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| Dungeons And Dragons; Character Background | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: Oct 28 2007, 05:46 PM (388 Views) | |
| CrimsonGenesis | Oct 28 2007, 05:46 PM Post #1 |
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Brackenwood Newbie
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Um, just a background story for my character (Male Dwarf monk/reaping mauler) and how the party met each other, my first attempt. [size=7]~ Dwarven Master Gau ~[/size] Ğuin Suo Gulòus Durāin “Gentle Gripping Fists” Gau grew up in a medium sized village on the outskirts of a huge mining tunnel network. Gau didn’t do much schooling and spent a majority of his early youth adventuring deeper into the caverns surrounding his village. His parents always disapproved of his behavior, for his father was the guild master of the Turein Dwarven Guild and was highly respected by the Dwarven community. At the age of seventeen, Gau stumbled across a huge nest of strangerlers and was almost beaten to death. He was saved the villages’ martial arts sensei Guronu. From that day forth Gau was taken on by Guronu as his apprentice. Years passed, Gau trained with vigor developing strengths that most miners couldn’t even match, until the day of “The Slide”. On the day of the Teronus full moon, Gau and Guronu where helping miners fend of fiends in the mines, an extremely powerful tremor quaked through the village. An enormous landslide formed and crushed a majority of the village, consuming almost every building and taking with them, every member of Gau’s family. After the devastation, there were only a small few whom had survived, the ones that where out of town during. With only a few buildings remaining and only a handful of miners, Gau and Guronu to man the village, they departed into the world. Gau and Guronu traveled for many years, fighting numerous foes and restoring justice to corrupt and chaotic lands they journeyed through, the duo came to a halt in a small village, not much different from their former. Unfortunately the town was under constant attack from the beasts and bandits surrounding their village. Guronu was getting older and traveling was staring to take it toll on the old dwarf. He volunteered to stay and train the villagers in the sacred art of combat. Gau was forced to venture forth into the world alone, to continue on the path of righteousness, to recall peace and justice to the lands which he treads. Many years passed by, Gau watched the world fluctuate between good, evil, order and corruption. [size=7]~ The Unexpected Heros ~[/size] Dawn was fast approaching; the night had been long and tiresome. Gau had spent the last six hours in constant combat smiting those of the Limb-Rippers tribe, a brutal orc tribe whom had been murdering, raping and pillaging the local villages. Gau was heading along a forest path on the way back to the main village carrying the head of the Limb-Rippers chief, when he heard a rustle of leaves. “Who approaches? Show yourself!” Shouts Gau. He heard four, five, ten, twenty bow strings tighten. Far too many to avoid. “You kill tribe!” Came a low grunted voice from Gau’s right. “I said show yourself, cowards!” To Gau’s surprise twenty orcs moved out of the bushes, surrounding Gau. “You no kill all of us, some hunting. Lucky for me, I chief now. But you must die!” The orc makes a ripping motion and the surrounding orcs pull their arrows back further for full power. Gau prepared for the final attack, but none came. A soft melody was issuing out of nowhere. One by one the orcs dropped, and by the sound of their roaring snores, they were fast asleep. Gau looked wildly around for the source, and out from behind the nearest tree stepped a short jolly looking human. “In a spot of bother were we?” Said the man, sounding somewhat amused. “I was, those orc scum fight dirty. I greatly appreciate your help, human” “Me name’s not human, it’s Daith, and might I ask yours?” “I am Gau of Turein,” “From what I’ve just heard Gau, you’ve just come back from killing a tribe of orcs, correct?” “Yes, the Limb-Rippers tribe, they have been causing much upset in these villages such as Hurthein, Port Guitin and –“ “Renoudin, yes, that is my hometown. I was also hunting these orcs. But it seems you’ve made my job considerable easier if these are all that remain, friend.” “Ah, I see you’re a bard Daith, you are by far the most talented music weaver I’ve seen in my travels.” “Naturally” Smirked Daith. “Shall we dispose of these?” Indicating the drooling savages still sprawled across the forest floor. “It isn’t in my nature to kill a defenseless being; however it is also not in my nature to be so easily forgiving or merciful. Gau and Daith walked among the orcs, disposing of their lives with a slice to the throat or a twist of the neck. With only two orcs remaining, one started to rouse. As fast as they could Gau and Daith charged. Gau grabbed the orc and twisted it easily into a sleeper hold whilst Daith slit its throat. It flopped to the ground, Gau and Daith looked down at it. “Disgusting” Mumbles Daith. Suddenly out of nowhere, the split second noise of a bowstring retracting. Just as Daith was turning around, he stopped suddenly. An inch from his right eye was the pointed tip of an orc arrow, held by Gau. Gau lowered his arm, crushing the huge arrow into splinters. Daith stood there, stunned while Gau charged at full force towards the offending orc. As the orc was reaching over his shoulder for a second arrow Gau took the perfect opportunity for his ultimate devastating crush. He seized the orcs right arm and swung round behind him; Gau locked his arms around the orcs torso and lifted him clean off the ground. The orc let out a shriek of pain followed by a sickening and distinct sound of a spine snapping in two. As it slumped to the floor, twitching Gau finished it off with another twist of the neck. Gau proceeded back over to Daith “Alrigh’?” “How did you do that? That arrow’s speed was mind boggling… you saved my life” “We’re even” Daith regained himself and flicked the blood from his dagger. “Daith, care to accompany me back to your town to deliver the news of good faith?” “Why the hell would I want to do that?” Gau looked quite a taken back by this statement. “I beg your pardon?” Gau’s voice rising slightly. “Kidding, kidding” Chucked Daith. Gau smiled, “Let’s go then, I daresay this quest has made me quite hungry” It didn’t take Gau and Daith very long to get back to Renoudin after taking a few of Daith’s choice shortcuts. The guard at the town gate jumped at the sight of Gau and Daith strolling out of the forest towards them, but let out n audible sigh of relief as the got closer. “Daith! Did you find them? Did you slay them?” stammered the timid guard. “Ah, morning Aaronok, Indeed, they are dead. But this mighty dwarf got there before me.” “Nonsense, I wouldn’t be standing here if not for your help!” boomed Gau “Well I thank you both, go on in. Lord Kousp is waiting your return” The guard still watching them with awe. Gau and Daith proceeded into the heart of the town and into the largest building. In the entrance hall stood Lord Kousp, a large bear looking man, talking to two distinguished looking men. “My Lord” Says Daith, in a low bow. “Oh Daith my boy! Enough with the formalities. How did it go?” Lord Kousp bustled past the two other men and embraced Daith. “They are dead uncle. This is Gau of Turein; it was he that destroyed the tribe.” Said Daith with a renewed sense of laughter in his voice. Lord Kousp still holding Daith at arm length turned his head slowly to Gau. “Gau? The apprentice of Guronu?” “Aye, well I used to be. He stayed behind to train small towns in combat” Heaved Gau, looking somewhat disgruntled. “It is an honor, Guronu must have seen much promise in you, for he denied me training thirty years ago.” Lord Kousp wasn’t bitter, but genuinely smiling. “And again, Daith helped me dispose of the last group of the orcs, he shant go unrewarded” “Oh and rewarded he shall be, as you master dwarf. Come, to the sitting room!” They strolled past the two other men staring with a confused look on their faces and into the large circular sitting room. Lord Kousp popped his head back out into the hallway. “Herec Gefrein, Dominc would you mind joining us?” The two men walked into the sitting room and sat down opposite Gau and Daith. “Daith, I was getting worried about you, and so I was about to send these two out to find you” Said Lord Kousp sitting down in a large backed chair to the right of Daith. “This is Herec Gefrein, the son of Herector and Gerinmor the master scouts, and of course Sir Dominc son of Sir Domanitor. Dominc’s forefathers have been the faithful protectors of Herec Grefrein’s family line for many generations.” Herec Gefrein and Dominc bowed to Gau and Daith, whom bowed back. “Yes, I have heard many tales of your families adventures. Some say your families have charted the entire world, inch for inch, and helping those in need on the way. I have much respect for this” It was Herec that spoke first. “I thank you Gau, yes it is true, I heard Daith say you’re from Turein?” “Aye, from the former Turein” “We passed by Turein two years ago, It was completely demolished, the only remaining life were the old miners in a camp just outside the rubble” Said Dominc, his voice was much deeper then expected. “Yes, I was taking care of a fiend infestation in the minds when it happened” Gau replies. He insisted upon changing the subject. “So, since you’ve got the entire world mapped, what are your reasons for continual travel?” “Well the lands are forever changing, and so do our maps also. Our background isn’t entirely rich, so we run an additional mercenary business to earn our way-” Said Herec before Gau interrupted. “Ah, so you help if it pays well?” Gau staring at the pair with a steely gaze. “You misunderstand us; sure we’ll help those in trouble. But if someone capable requires further assistance it is only fair we receive equality goods of service.” Replied Dominc, standing back up. “Leaving so soon lads?” Boomed Lord Kousp who also now standing. “Well yes there really isn’t any need for us to remain here, I see the task was complete and your nephew returned” Said Herec as he was fastening his backpack. “To where are you heading?” Asked Gau “West, through the swamplands, is this your destination also?” “Aye” Gau looked around at Daith who was talking with Lord Kousp in the corner. “Well, I think that’s about it, we bid you farewell” Said Herec as he and Dominc turned facing the door. “Wait!” Came from the corner of the room, Daith had spoken. “The only reason I’ve stayed in this town was to help protect it from the tribe of orcs, now that there isn’t any threat to the village I was going to journey out around the world to better myself. Do you two mind if I join your expedition?” Herec turned to Dominc; they seemed to be communicating somehow without words. Suddenly Dominc spoke “I see no reason why not. A bit of extra skill doesn’t go astray, especially in such a dangerous world.” “Excellent! It’s settled then. Before you go, might I treat you all to spot of brunch?” “Gau, you’re heading west too are you not? Why don’t you join us?” Gau looked from one to the other, pondering before reaching his decision. “If you wouldn’t mind, my journeys have been quite long and lonesome; a bit of company would be nice for a change.” Before heading west, the newly formed group enjoyed a huge banquette, and were supplied with new equipment as gifts from the townspeople. Days turned into weeks, weeks into months, months into years. The group made a good team and therefore never ended up separating. To this day, they continue to adventure throughout the world. |
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| Turnip05 | Oct 28 2007, 09:56 PM Post #2 |
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Majestic Turnip
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Interesting, I like the RPG-ish feel to it
There a few little things that struck me though when reading through the first time. In the first paragraph you use a lot of 'Gau' when it would be more effective to just use 'he'. We already know you're talking about Gau after the first sentence so you can just use 'he' until Guronu comes in. Sometimes your tenses changed randomly and didn't make much sense, or you forgot to put in 'was' -
There might be a few more too, so you just need to check it over. Apart from a few spelling mistakes, I really like it! Hope I've given some useful advice. If not, sorry for being picky
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| CrimsonGenesis | Oct 28 2007, 11:23 PM Post #3 |
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Brackenwood Newbie
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oh yeah i forgot to mention i accidentally changed the writing style three or four times lol |
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6:42 PM Jul 11