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NWA: New England Wrestling; This is the place for news on NEW!
Topic Started: Apr 19 2006, 08:02 PM (6,345 Views)
Scrooge McSuck
I'll get you next time, toilet!
[ *  *  * ]
All he has is Chris Jericho. :D
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The Swigg Lebowski
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Current Two Time DWB Champion
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Before I get slammed for false advertising, my main event is actually Batista vs. Raven.

So watch NWA Midwest's Saturday Night for all the best garbage brawling you'll EVER see.
Scrooge McSuck
 
I'm too hefty for my slacks. The zippers off it's tracks. I've stretched it to the maa-a-a-a-x.
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TheGreatWhiteChoate
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dWb Superstar
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Hey, it's New England Wrestling. I have to an ardent supporter...even as I write promos for Plague.
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The Ultimate Warrior dancing with Phil Collins. My life, at last, complete.
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Scrooge McSuck
I'll get you next time, toilet!
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Batista vs. Raven? (flushes toilet)
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SamoaRowe
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dWb Superstar
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Scrooge McSuck,Apr 20 2006
08:14 PM
Batista vs. Raven? (flushes toilet)

My main event looks pretty good in comparison now, doesn't it?
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The Swigg Lebowski
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Current Two Time DWB Champion
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SamoaRowe,Apr 20 2006
08:14 PM
Scrooge McSuck,Apr 20 2006
08:14 PM
Batista vs. Raven? (flushes toilet)

My main event looks pretty good in comparison now, doesn't it?

I've also got Regal vs Monty Brown, Homicide vs. Paul London, and The Briscoe Brothers vs Balls Mahoney and a partner of his choosing.

So yeah, garbage brawling and some good X division action
Scrooge McSuck
 
I'm too hefty for my slacks. The zippers off it's tracks. I've stretched it to the maa-a-a-a-x.
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Scrooge McSuck
I'll get you next time, toilet!
[ *  *  * ]
Regal/Brown has cluster-fuck written all over it, Homocide/London is feh, and anything with Balls sucks dick.
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The Swigg Lebowski
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Scrooge McSuck,Apr 20 2006
08:21 PM
Regal/Brown has cluster-fuck written all over it, Homocide/London is feh, and anything with Balls sucks dick.

There's a siq quote in that post
Scrooge McSuck
 
I'm too hefty for my slacks. The zippers off it's tracks. I've stretched it to the maa-a-a-a-x.
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SamoaRowe
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Quote:
 
The NEW Championship Tournament Brackets
5/5/06


Chris Jericho
Sonjay Dutt

JBL
Steve Corino

Tajiri
Rene Dupree

Christian Cage
Daivari

Kane
Mick Foley

Big Show
Edge

The Rock
Ric Flair

The Undertaker
Gregory Helms
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The Swigg Lebowski
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Current Two Time DWB Champion
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Nice Brackets, Rowe.
Scrooge McSuck
 
I'm too hefty for my slacks. The zippers off it's tracks. I've stretched it to the maa-a-a-a-x.
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SamoaRowe
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TheBigSwigg,Apr 21 2006
10:24 AM
Nice Brackets, Rowe.

Thanks :) I'm hoping it turns out to be an interesting tourney.
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SamoaRowe
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NWA: New England Saturday Night!
May 6th 2006


The show opens with an outdoors shot of the David R. Cawley School in Hooksett, New Hampshire. A limo pulls up to the entrance and out steps none other than… The Rock! The Rock confidently strolls into the building with his luggage.

Next up a generic opening video plays. It is just crazy graphics right now, since no actual NEW footage exists… yet.

This groundbreaking first edition of NEW Saturday Night is airing live from the sold out gymnasium at the school (it’s a huge gym, believe me). 1,757 wrestling fans have crowded there way in and there is a relatively nice looking stage set up (kind of reminiscent of the one used on iMPACT!).

NEW President Ernie Rowe and local madman Professor Plague are on commentary.

Rowe: Ladies and gentlemen, it is my great honor to welcome you to the first ever NEW Saturday Night! We have a jam packed show for you tonight! The Rock is here! We are expecting Mick Foley and Ric Flair at any moment! Not only that, but the first two matches in the tournament to crown the first NEW Champion will be held this evening!

Plague: That’s cool and all, but I’m really just excited about our first match of the evening. We are in for a treat.

Match 1: Gregory Helms vs Shark Boy

The match starts off slow, as Shark Boy is playing to the crowd. The kids in the audience LOVE Shark Boy. Helms loses his patience and slaps the taste out of Shark Boy, which results in a short brawl. It is not long before this turns into a fun spot-fest, with Shark Boy dominating. Unfortunately, Helms hits a Shiny Wizard out of no where and picks up the victory at 6:56.

Winner: Gregory Helms, *** (72/59/86)

Plague: And there you have it, folks. That was the greatest match in NEW history!

Rowe: At this moment, that was the only match in NEW history. Do I need to remind you that I own this company? I could fire your ass.

Plague: Whatever, its time for a commercial.

-After the break, a familiar car screeching sound blares over the speakers and the crowd goes nuts for the arrival of the hardcore legend himself, Mick Foley! Foley grabs a microphone and heads to the ring.

Foley: Before I get started, I just have to mention how great it is to be here, in Hooksett, NH! (cheap pop from the crowd). Seriously though, it is such an honor and a privilege to be a part of this company. I have wrestled all over the world, main evented Wrestlemania, and am a proud three time world champion , but this has gotta be by far the greatest… (Foley is cut off by some more familiar music).

“WHOOOOOOOOO!” blares over the speakers and out comes “Nature Boy” Ric Flair. Flair has his own microphone.

Flair: Foley, I am here to save these people from your self serving crap. You like to think you are some sort of legend in this business. What exactly did you do? You fell off of a cage? You got hit over the head with a chair a few too many times with your family watching in attendance? You got retired by Triple H in your own match? Hell, your three world title reigns added up consist of less than two months! Foley, you are nothing but a glorified stunt man. You have done nothing in this business! Your career doesn’t even come close to matching that of, WHOOO, the Nature Boy! I’m the 16 time world champion, and I’m sure as hell going to be the first, whoooo, NEW Champion!

Foley: You know what, Ric, you’re right. I have had my ass kicked more times that I care to remember. I’ve been bloodied, bruised, but I’ve always come back for more. I may not have had the career you’ve had, Ric, but I did things my way and I’m pretty damn proud of what I accomplished. That’s right, I’m proud. And one of the things I’m most proud about is never once exposing saggy man boobs to the world the way you have! I’ve at least had the smarts to keep a shirt on.

Flair: We’ll see how good you look when you hit 56! Foley, you are an idiot, just like every single one of these fans. You are a disgrace and so is this promotion! You call yourself a wrestler? You embarrass me, you fat, out of shape, good for no…

Foley cuts Flair off by punching him in the face. Flair tackles Foley and they fall to the ground wrestling. Security runs out and breaks them up. (97%)

Rowe: Oh my God. Ric Flair and Mick Foley have brought their long standing hatred of each other to NEW!

Plague: We’ll be right back, after these messages.

-Chris Jericho makes his entrance to a nice face pop, but Jericho is not smiling. Jericho takes a microphone and berates the fans in attendance. Jericho says there is no reason for him to be in this ring tonight, since he is filthy rich and has done it all in wrestling. Jericho says the only reason he is here is because he does not feel he is rich enough. Jericho’s rant is cut off by Sonjay Dutt’s music and the match is on! (100%).

Match 2: Chris Jericho vs Sonjay Dutt (Opening Round tournament match)

This is a fast paced match from bell to bell. Jericho dominates Dutt in the early going, even going for the cocky pin. Dutt fires back with some offense, even managing to hit the sprinkler. Dutt gets a near fall on Jericho, but almost being pinned fires Jericho up. Jericho hits a nasty lionsault and locks Dutt into the Walls of Jericho. Dutt taps out at 4:20, and Jericho leaves the hold on well past the bell. He only lets go when the referee threatens to reverse the decision.

Winner: Chris Jericho, *** (80/76/84)

Match 3: Steve Corino vs JBL (Opening Round Tournament Match)

JBL and Corino put on a rest heavy match up. Corino works the neck and wrist of JBL for several minutes, before JBL clobbers back with some fallaway slams. JBL hits the Clothesline from Hell, but Corino gets his foot on the ropes during the cover. JBL removes the padding from a turnbuckle and goes to slingshot Corino into it. Corino reverses and drops JBL chest first on the bare turnbuckle. JBL is easy prey for the Old School Expulsion, as Corino pins him at 7:00.

Winner: Steve Corino, ** (77/80/72)

-“If you SMEEEEEEEEEELL… what the ROCK… is COOKING” blares over the speakers and The Rock is in the house! Rock takes a microphone and addresses the crowd.

Rock: Finally… the Rock HAS COME to… Hooksett. A lot of people have come up to The Rock and asked “Rock, why have you come back to wrestling? What happened to Hollywood?” The truth is, The Rock has had a lot of fun in Hollywood, The Rock has made a lot of friends, and The Rock has made his fortunes. But Hollywood and The Rock were not a perfect fit. When the Rock is in the studio, The Rock cannot hear the cheers of the millions (and millions) of The Rock’s fans. Unlike that monkey-loving sonovabitch Chris Jericho, The Rock isn’t here for money. The Rock is here because The Rock loves entertaining his fans. The Rock also… (The Rock is cut off by some unfamiliar music. Sonny Siaki appears on the stage, holding a microphone).

Siaki: You know something, Rock, why don’t you spare us your crap. You come out here and badmouth Chris Jericho as if you’re better than him. We all know why you’re here, Rock. You are here because your movies suck and Hollywood doesn’t want you anymore!

Rock: Who in the blue hell are you?

Siaki: My name is Sonny Sia…

The Rock: IT DOESN’T MATTER WHAT YOUR NAME IS! You say Hollywood doesn’t want The Rock? You say Chris Jericho is better than The Rock? The Rock says you can take your outlandish theories, your imaginative rumors, and shove them straight up your candy ass! Let The Rock tell you one thing, Sonny boy, The Rock may have been away from the ring for a good long while, but the Rock can still kick your rudy-poo monkey ass all the way from Manchester to Seattle and not break a sweat. So in closing, all The Rock has to say is… just bring it.

Sonny Siaki charges the ring but quickly suffers a rock bottom. The Rock poses over the fallen Sonny Siaki and takes the microphone one last time.

The Rock: If you smell… what the Rock… is cooking. (83%)

Match 4: Kane And Big Show vs Team 3D

Kane and Big Show are playing the role of wacky tag team partners who hate each other. Team 3D dominates in the early going, as they isolate Big Show by targeting his knee. Show is at the point where he can’t put any weight on his left knee. There is a commercial break during a Brother Devon leg lock spot. After the break, Big Show catches both members of Team 3D and goes for a double chokeslam, but his knee gives out. Luckily, Show manages to fall into Kane’s corner and makes the tag. Kane cleans house on Team 3D and hits a mean chokeslam on Brother Ray for the win at 12:00. After the match, Kane mocks Big Show over his injury. Team 3D are pissed off and set up a table in the ring. Kane stands back and lets them put Big Show through the table with the 3D!

Winners: Big Show and Kane, **3/4. 83/85/79

Rowe: What a night we have had! Chris Jericho and Steve Corino have both advanced in the NEW Championship tournament!

Plague: That main event kicked all types of ass too.

Rowe: Don’t forget to tune in next week! I have been informed that the NEW title tournament will continue with the next two opening round matches!

Plague: Not only that, but The Rock will take on Sonny Siaki!

Rowe: And what will Ric Flair and Mick Foley have to say in response to their brawl from earlier tonight?

Plague: You cannot afford to miss the second action packed episode of NEW Saturday Night! Good night, folks!


OVERALL SHOW: 85%
We got a 2.10 rating for 'NWA New England'!
The attendance level was 1757 people.
We made $52710 from ticket sales.
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jamiegeist
Poops McGee
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I gotta give it up Rowe. That was a damn entertaining show. Easy read, but plenty detailed as well. You're obviously high on star power, and your segment (Flair/Foley, Rock, Jericho) just destroyed and kicked alot of ass. I've always wanted Rock to slap Sonny Siaki around a bit, so that is nice.

Very good start, and very impressive Show Rating and TV Rating. How in the blue hell did Kane & Big Show v 3D pull off an 83 total rating? Thats's over ***, are you f'n kidding me?

Anyway, great show, and I already look forward to next weeks.
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Scrooge McSuck
I'll get you next time, toilet!
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Kane/Show vs. Team 3D got nearly ***?! Holy shit... and go Kane!
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jamiegeist
Poops McGee
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It's actually over 3 stars. The 83 number is the one that matters.

The other rating is just one of the silly "My Opinion" ratings that your recapper puts out there.

The scale: 50=DUD, 60=*, 70=**, 80=***, 90=****, 100=*****

Got it from a forum, trying to get it over as an "official" scoring method. And it is pretty accurate.
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