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NWA: New England Wrestling; This is the place for news on NEW!
Topic Started: Apr 19 2006, 08:02 PM (6,340 Views)
SamoaRowe
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jamiegeist,May 13 2006
02:07 PM
Kind of serves as a nice little "Event Center" so you can look at the upcoming matches and history as well.

Bingo. Now I just have to work on becoming talented with photoshop B)
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Viceroy Virus
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The Return of Andre "The Fucking" Giant!
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I don't know whether to say something about you screwing over Edge, or to be happy that Kane won.

I can already sense a Montreal style Screwjob with headbooker Ernie Rowe and Edge.
<a href="https://imgur.com/n82v3zw"><img src="https://i.imgur.com/n82v3zw.jpg" title="source: imgur.com" /></a>
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Scrooge McSuck
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Works for me, and I have new respect for it now that when I want to know what is set for the upcoming big shows in my Sheets, I have a simple source to check for you two, instead of going through an entire episode of Saturday Night.
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SamoaRowe
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NEW Saturday Night
June 3rd 2006


-The show opens with Ernie Rowe and Professor Plague sitting in a studio.

Rowe: NEW fans, this week we take a look back at the historical first month of NEW action.

Plague: That's right, folks, get out your blank tapes or dvd-r's, the next 60 minutes are must-have footage.

Rowe: Let's start by looking back at the very first episode of NEW Saturday Night, where Team 3-D did battle with the monstrous team of Big Show and Kane.

Kane And Big Show vs Team 3D
May 6th 2006


Kane and Big Show are playing the role of wacky tag team partners who hate each other. Team 3D dominates in the early going, as they isolate Big Show by targeting his knee. Show is at the point where he can’t put any weight on his left knee. There is a commercial break during a Brother Devon leg lock spot. After the break, Big Show catches both members of Team 3D and goes for a double chokeslam, but his knee gives out. Luckily, Show manages to fall into Kane’s corner and makes the tag. Kane cleans house on Team 3D and hits a mean chokeslam on Brother Ray for the win at 12:00. After the match, Kane mocks Big Show over his injury. Team 3D are pissed off and set up a table in the ring. Kane stands back and lets them put Big Show through the table with the 3D!

Winners: Big Show and Kane, **3/4. 83/85/79

Rowe: Not only was this the main event of the first edition of NEW Saturday Night, but it started Kane's dominance over NEW. Kane is the only undefeated member of the NEW roster!

Plague: On that same night, The Rock made his return to pro wrestling, and he was encountered by a most unlikely challenger.

In-ring segment
May 6th 2006


“If you SMEEEEEEEEEELL… what the ROCK… is COOKING” blares over the speakers and The Rock is in the house! Rock takes a microphone and addresses the crowd.

Rock: Finally… the Rock HAS COME to… Hooksett. A lot of people have come up to The Rock and asked “Rock, why have you come back to wrestling? What happened to Hollywood?” The truth is, The Rock has had a lot of fun in Hollywood, The Rock has made a lot of friends, and The Rock has made his fortunes. But Hollywood and The Rock were not a perfect fit. When the Rock is in the studio, The Rock cannot hear the cheers of the millions (and millions) of The Rock’s fans. Unlike that monkey-loving sonovabitch Chris Jericho, The Rock isn’t here for money. The Rock is here because The Rock loves entertaining his fans. The Rock also… (The Rock is cut off by some unfamiliar music. Sonny Siaki appears on the stage, holding a microphone).

Siaki: You know something, Rock, why don’t you spare us your crap. You come out here and badmouth Chris Jericho as if you’re better than him. We all know why you’re here, Rock. You are here because your movies suck and Hollywood doesn’t want you anymore!

Rock: Who in the blue hell are you?

Siaki: My name is Sonny Sia…

The Rock: IT DOESN’T MATTER WHAT YOUR NAME IS! You say Hollywood doesn’t want The Rock? You say Chris Jericho is better than The Rock? The Rock says you can take your outlandish theories, your imaginative rumors, and shove them straight up your candy ass! Let The Rock tell you one thing, Sonny boy, The Rock may have been away from the ring for a good long while, but the Rock can still kick your rudy-poo monkey ass all the way from Manchester to Seattle and not break a sweat. So in closing, all The Rock has to say is… just bring it.

Sonny Siaki charges the ring but quickly suffers a rock bottom. The Rock poses over the fallen Sonny Siaki and takes the microphone one last time.

The Rock: If you smell… what the Rock… is cooking. (83%)
--------------------------------------------------------------------

Rowe: The result was this big time match the next week on Saturday Night.

The Rock vs Sonny Siaki
May 13th 2006


The Rock comes out to a huge ovation and catches Sonny Siaki off guard. Rock fires way with some lightning fast punches, and knocks Siaki silly. Siaki goes to ringside to recover and Rock pursues him, but Siaki whips Rock into the ring post. Rock is busted open! Siaki then pummels The Rock with some hard strikes to the open wound on The Rock’s forehead. Siaki goes for the Siakalypse, but The Rock reverses the move. Rock hits the Rock Bottom and pins Sonny Siaki at 9:12!

Winner: The Rock, **1/4 (78/80/75)

Next we see a hype video for Foley vs. Flair. It features Foley and Flair encountering each other on the first show, their brawl from the second show, Foley sticking Mr. Socko down Flair's throat, and finally Flair beating Foley in the handicap match from last week.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Rowe: NEW is jam packed with some of the biggest stars in wrestling history. From The Rock to Ric Flair to Mick Foley to Chris Jericho, NEW has something for everyone!

Plague: But no debut was more highly anticipated than that of The Undertaker.

Rowe: That's right, The Undertaker rode in on his prized motorcycle in all his glory, as we witnessed the return of the biker Undertaker!

The Undertaker vs Gregory Helms
May 20th 2006


Gregory Helms is the first to the ring and he looks more nervous than he let on earlier. Then the arena goes dark… and the terrifying sound of a gong travels through the arena… and then…. “Dead Man Walking.” The lights come back on, strobe lights light up the arena, and the sound of a motorcycle can be heard. It’s the return of Biker Taker! The Undertaker rides into the arena to a monster pop. He quickly enters the ring and quickly tangles up with Helms. Undertaker hits all of his signature spots, including the old school rope walk, the legdrop on the apron, and even whips Helms into the steel steps at ringside. Helms in a daze, but manages to hit some offense of his own on Undertaker. Helms drops Taker with a dropkick and puts him in a sleeper. Undertaker fights out of it and hits the Last Ride on Helms for the win at 6:50!

Winner: The Undertaker, **1/4 (78/81/74)

Rowe: The Undertaker was dominant in his NEW debut.

Plague: But you have to give Gregory Helms a round of applause, he gave 'Taker a hell of a fight!

Rowe: Yes, and it has been confirmed that The Undertaker will be appearing at NEW River Rumble, June 25th at the Verizon Wireless Arena in Manchester, New Hampshire! The Undertaker just may well be competing for the NEW Championship, if he can continue advancing in the tournament.

Plague: That's right. Also confirmed for River Rumble is Team 3-D vs America's Most Wanted vs the Basham Brothers in a three-way match to crown the first ever NEW Tag Team Champions!

Rowe: That is cannot miss entertainment. Also, I need to take a moment to address something very important. Last week on NEW Saturday Night, we had this awkward situation:

In-ring segment
May 27th 2006


John Bradshaw Layfield comes out to the ring and he does not look pleased at all. He takes a microphone.

JBL: It has come to my attention that the man who beat me in the NEW Championship tournament, Steve Corino, has been traded out of NEW. It has also come to my attention that Corino ASKED to be traded out. Apparently, Corino feels that he is too good to be a part of NEW, and in all honesty he has every right to feel that way. I mean, NEW is definitely where the big boys play, but New England itself? Hell, New England sucks! This area is overrun by liberals, white trash, and is just plain boring in general. Every moment I spend in New England simply kills me! So in that regard, I wish Steve Corino the best of luck, even if its over in the central states, the only part of the U.S. I cannot stand more than New England. But on the other hand, Steve Corino, how dare you have the audacity to beat the wrestling God and then run out of town before I could get my rematch! And how dare you give up your spot in the NEW Championship tournament so damn easily! This brings me to why I am out here… (looks toward the commentator’s booth) Ernie Rowe! I am asking… no, I am DEMANDING that you give Corino’s spot in the tournament to me.

Rowe: Why should I, JBL? It would only cheapen the tournament to let someone coast through without even winning a damn match! You know I am pissed off at Corino more than anyone, for already tarnishing the glory of the tournament and for walking away at such a prestigious prize as the NEW Championship. So you know what I am going to do, JBL? You will compete in a second opening round match, one that will replace the one you had with Corino. It will take place right now, and it will be against the man who came to us from NWA:CSW in exchange for Corino. Ladies and gentlemen, it is with great pride that I introduce you to the newest member of the NEW roster: Chris Sabin! (From here a clipped version of the Sabin/JBL match plays).
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Rowe: My point is that I am the president of NEW, but I also take great pleasure in calling the matches from ringside. JBL made me a part of a show and forced me to be a nonobjective announcer. I cannot allow this to happen, so I have gone out and hired someone to act as the "General Manager" of NEW. This man answers to me and me only, but I have told him that he is free to handle things the way he best sees fit, because I don't want to be dragged into the show anymore than I have to. Starting next week, the new GM of NEW will debut.

Plague: Who is it?

Rowe: You'll find out next week.

Plague: Damn you, Rowe. Anyways, our last match of the evening was the exciting three on two handicap match from last week's Saturday Night. It was a great match, if I do say so myself.

Rock N Sock Connection vs Chris Jericho, Ric Flair, and Sonny Siaki
May 27th 2006


Chris Jericho makes it clear in the very early going that he is not interested in teaming with Sonny Siaki. Jericho starts off against The Rock, and they lock up. Jericho dishes out some knife edge chops while Rock hits his signature punches. Jericho goes for the Walls of Jericho, but Rock makes it to the ropes. Rock fights back and goes for the sharpshooter, but Jericho quickly tags in Ric Flair. Flair chops the life out of Rock, but Rock comes back with a spine buster. Foley is begging for a tag, so Rock obliges, but Flair quickly tags Jericho back in. Foley overpowers Jericho with his brawling and clotheslines him over the ropes. Foley backs Jericho into the steel steps, while Flair and Siaki double team The Rock in the ring. Foley runs back in for the save and helps Rock remove both Siaki and Flair from the ring. We head to a commercial at 5:05.

After the break, Foley and Jericho are going at it. Jericho hits a lionsault on Foley and goes for the cover, but The Rock breaks it up. Jericho makes it clear that he is avoiding tagging in Sonny Siaki, whom he has no confidence in. Flair is back in the ring, and doesn’t mind wrestling a hurt Foley. Flair drops some knees on Foley’s chest and goes for the figure four. The Rock breaks it up. Jericho charges the ring but Rock sends him flying over the ropes. Siaki then makes a blind tag to Flair and cleans house on Rock and Foley. Siaki hits the Siakalypse on Rock, but walks right into Mr. Socko and the mandible claw from Foley. Siaki is in big trouble, as Jericho storms back into the ring. The Rock cuts Jericho off again and they brawl into the audience, forgetting the match. In the ring, Foley has forced Siaki to pass out, and drags him to Flair so he can make a tag. Flair makes the reluctant tag and they tie up. It isn’t long before Flair accidentally clotheslines the referee. Foley and Flair are both exhausted and circle each other when suddenly… TOMMY DREAMER runs in with a kendo stick. Dreamer threatens to hit Flair with the stick, but instead nails Foley in the head with it! Foley goes down. Dreamer revives the referee, who is able to count Flair’s cover, giving him the win at 14:45!

Winners: Chris Jericho, Ric Flair, and Sonny Siaki, **3/4 (86/90/78)

Rowe: And there you have it! The first month of NEW was highly memorable, and I cannot wait to see what happens in the second month and beyond!

Plague: Its been a wild ride thus far, I too cannot wait to see what happens next.

Rowe: To the fans watching at home, see you next week! The unveiling of the NEW GM will be held, as well as the continuation of the NEW Championship tournament! This will include our big main event of the evening, as The Rock faces The Undertaker in a quarter final match!

Plague: Later, folks!

Rating: 2.19 (because I say so :P )
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jamiegeist
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Nice clip show. You managed to advance a current story (GM) and recap all of the other major action without having to worry about writing a show and putting it through EWR. Hope your flood stuff all works out.
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Scrooge McSuck
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Quote:
 
Rowe: Not only was this the main event of the first edition of NEW Saturday Night, but it started Kane's dominance over NEW. Kane is the only undefeated member of the NEW roster!


WOO! KAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANE~~!!!!
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TheGreatWhiteChoate
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I see all pretense of no bias has evaporated.
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The Ultimate Warrior dancing with Phil Collins. My life, at last, complete.
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Scrooge McSuck
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Who had protest of what?
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SamoaRowe
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NEW Saturday Night!
June 10th 2006


The opening video package plays and we are airing live from the Cawley School in Hooksett, New Hampshire! The fans are excited to be here, as are the announcers, Ernie Rowe and Professor Plague. The NEW tournament continues tonight, and so far the brackets stand as: http://www.i2.ca/tournawiz/16draw.php?id=8&uid=samoarowe

Rowe: Welcome to the sixth installment of NEW Saturday Night. It is great to be back in business after the harsh weather conditions that have plagued New England.

Plague: You just had to drag me into this, didn’t you!

Rowe: That’s right, Plague, the world revolves around you. But on with the show! (Stands up and takes a microphone). Ladies and gentlemen, allow me to introduce you to the first NEW General Manager…. Eric Bischoff!

Eric Bischoff comes out to the ring to mostly boos. Bischoff takes it in stride and takes a microphone.

Bischoff: Now I know some of you are worried about me being assigned as the General Manager of New England Wrestling, and I can’t say I blame you. I’ve got a bit of a bad reputation, some might say I’m something of a snake. But you know what, I am coming here to New England Wrestling with no political agenda, no biases, and no scores to settle. I’m going to be fair and impartial, that I promise you, the NEW fans. My first order of business this week was to keep Tommy Dreamer from appearing here tonight. His interference in the main event two weeks ago did not go unnoticed. In fact, next week Tommy Dreamer will make his in ring debut next week against Mick Foley, in a hardcore match! (Rowe marks out). So NEW fans, sit back and enjoy the show!

Rowe: It looks as if I made the right decision by hiring Eric Bischoff.

Plague: We’ll see about that, I liked the old Bischoff a lot better.

Match 1: Chris Jericho vs John Bradshaw Layfield (Quarterfinal tournament match)

This is a well worked heel vs heel match. JBL and Jericho try to see who can out cheat the other one, which earns them each some face pops from the crowd. JBL positions to put Jericho away with a clothesline from hell, but Sonny Siaki shows up at ringside and trips him. This gives Jericho time to hit the running bulldog and the lionsault for the victory at 6:44. After the match, Jericho smacks Siaki for getting in his business again.
Winner: Chris Jericho, **1/2 (75%)

Rowe: That match was hard to call since I didn’t really want either man to advance.

Plague: But what’s the problem with Chris Jericho? Every time Siaki helps him out, Jericho acts all whiny.

Rowe: Jericho may be an arrogant, cowardly, son of a bitch, but it would appear he does have some honor.

-After a commercial break, Eric Bischoff is back in the ring. He has a mic again.

Bischoff: My second act as General Manager was to secure a big time guest star for NEW Saturday Night. Most of you know him as the man who has made a career out of pointing fun at my mistakes, he runs the successful Wrestlecrap.com. He is the one and only R.D. Reynolds!

Reynolds comes out to a nice pop from the crowd, since NEW has been advertising his website for the past several weeks.

Reynolds: Hey, its great to be standing here with one of my favorite targets. Who ever thought the day would come when R.D. Reynolds and Eric Bischoff would be standing in the same ring and NOT fighting.

Bischoff: Believe it or not, but I enjoy your work. When professional wrestling goofs up, you’re there to lead the fans in enjoying a collection laugh at it.

Reynolds: Its part of my passion, because I do love wrestling and… (the music of Ric Flair cuts him off).

Flair: R.D. Reynolds… what the HELL do you think you are doing here! You are a bigger embarrassment to wrestling than Mick Foley, and that’s saying something! You think wrestling is something to be laughed at?

Reynolds: C’mon, Ric, wrestling can be pretty goofy at some points. I mean, wasn’t it true that WCW once wanted you to cut your hair, wearing an earring, and wrestle as Spartacus?

Flair: How dare you bring that up! Jim Herd was out to ruin the Nature Boy! You think that’s funny? You can kiss my ass, you no good (gets cut off by Foley’s music).

Foley: C’mon, Ric. Have a sense of humor. Besides, I think if you had become Spartacus, it would’ve been an improvement. That way you could’ve had fans laughing with you for the past fifteen years instead of laughing at you for trying to pass yourself off as the great wrestler you used to be.

Reynolds: Gentlemen, if you could excuse me, this is my interview time. Besides, Mick, didn’t Vince McMahon want you to be “Mason the Mutilator” when you first arrived in the World Wrestling Federation? That would’ve been less embarrassing than participating in that wonderful dog poo match in 1999.

Flair: He’s got a point, Mick.

Bischoff: You know something, you guys have just given me an idea. Flair and Foley obviously cannot stand each other and both are out of the NEW title tournament. And since you have both gone and interrupted Reynold’s interview time, you have given me a great idea for a match. At NEW’s first big mega event, River Rumble, you two will face off in the first ever WRESTLECRAP match! If Flair wins, Foley must be “Mason the Mutilator” for an entire month! And if Foley wins, Flair must be “Spartacus” for a month as well.

Flair: What! That’s an outrage! You cannot do this to the Nature Boy!

Foley: What’s the matter, Ric, think you’ll have trouble beating me? I mean, according to you I’m the biggest embarrassment to wrestling, so it should be a cake walk.

Flair: Shut up, Foley. I’ll see you at River Rumble. Oh, and good luck next week against my new buddy, Tommy Dreamer. By the time he’s through with you, I won’t even need to break a sweat beating you at River Rumble.

The two stare down again to end the segment.

Match 2: America's Most Wanted vs D'Lo Brown and Tajiri

This is AMW’s debut match in New England Wrestling. They put on quite a show against Brown and Tajiri. Tajiri becomes the face in peril for several minutes, but hits some stiff kicks to the head of Wildcat Chris Harris. Tajiri tags in Brown, who cleans house on both members of AMW. Brown goes for the LoDown on Storm, who moves out of the way. Tajiri makes a blind tag, but fails to notice when James Storm handcuffs Brown to the ring ropes. This leaves Tajiri as an easy victim to the Death Sentence, and Storm covers Tajiri for the win at 10:00.
Winners: AMW, ***3/4 (82%)

Plague: That was an impressive debut by America’s Most Wanted, giving them some outstanding momentum going into River Rumble, where they’ll meet Team 3-D and the Basham Brothers for the NEW Tag Team Championship.

Rowe: These two are talented indeed, but I could have lived without the handcuffs.

- Backstage, Iron Troy Cumings is standing by with John Bradshaw Layfield. Iron Troy asks JBL how he feels about his loss to Chris Jericho earlier tonight. JBL states that he got screwed by Sonny Siaki, and he won’t be forgetting about it anytime soon. JBL goes on to talk about River Rumble, where he had planned on winning the NEW Championship, but now he doesn’t even have a match. JBL places the blame on Steve Corino, saying that Corino should’ve been the one losing to Jericho tonight, so JBL could laugh in his face. JBL tells Corino that he is superior to any worker in NWA:CSW and that Corino went from being at the bottom tier of NEW to being the big fish in a small pond in CSW. JBL states that CSW is pathetic and that anyone who watches it should be kicked in the ass, just like the already fired Viscera.

-Meanwhile, Christian Cage is strolling down a hallway, when Edge comes out of no where and spears him into the wall. Christian is down and out, but Edge has some words for him. Edge tells Christian that he will not forget how Christian cost him the chance to be NEW Champion, and that he has no chance in hell of being Chris Jericho in the semifinals of the tournament.

Match 3: The Rock vs The Undertaker (Quarterfinal Tournament Match)

This is a huge match to be featured on live television. The Rock and Undertaker do a stare down before they start trading punches. The Undertaker overpowers The Rock, even going for an early chokeslam. The Rock counters and hits a big DDT on the Undertaker. They brawl to ringside, where The Rock clotheslines ‘Taker onto the announce table. ‘Taker fights back and body drops The Rock onto the table, with it collapsing under his weight. We then take a quick commercial break. After the break, The Undertaker has The Rock in a triangle choke, right in the middle of the ring. The Rock fights out of it, and lays the smackdown on ‘Taker. The Rock hits the Rock Bottom on the Undertaker and is about to do the People’s Elbow, when CHRIS JERICHO flies into the ring and flattens The Rock with a steel chair. This gives The Rock the DQ victory at 14:40. The Undertaker gets to his feet, outraged, and chokeslams Jericho.
Winner: The Rock, **1/2. (88/95/74)

Rowe: What a main event that was, up until Chris Jericho ruined it for everyone!

Plague: Whatever, we all know that Jericho is winning this tournament.

Rowe: We’ll see about that. I just got word over my headset from Bischoff that next week he wants The Rock and Undertaker to face Chris Jericho and Sonny Siaki in a big tag team match.

Plague: Wow, add that to Foley vs Dreamer in a hardcore match, and next week is stacked!

Rowe: That’s right, you cannot afford to miss another thrilling episode of NEW Saturday Night!

Updated tournament brackets: http://www.i2.ca/tournawiz/16draw.php?id=9&uid=samoarowe

Overall: 84
We got a 2.06 rating for 'NEW Saturday Night!'!
The attendance level was 2504 people.
We made $75120 from ticket sales.
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jamiegeist
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Great show again this week Rowe. Glad to see you returning to weekly programming.

I was a bit hesitant about the R.D. Reynolds thing, as I don't even know who the fuck that is, but you spun it into the Wrestlecrap idea, which seems cool. However, when I read the line about a WRESTLECRAP match, I immediately thought of all the horrible gimmicks and ideas that could be spun into that match. Instead the stip has them playing their proposed shitty characters? Left me a little flat, thats all.

Your tourney is setting up very nicely with Cage/Jericho and Kane/Rock being great matchups.

Good debut of sorts for AMW to hype them into River Rumble, and I'm looking forward to next week with Rock & Taker v Jericho & Siaki.
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SamoaRowe
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jamiegeist,May 26 2006
12:05 AM
I was a bit hesitant about the R.D. Reynolds thing, as I don't even know who the fuck that is, but you spun it into the Wrestlecrap idea, which seems cool. However, when I read the line about a WRESTLECRAP match, I immediately thought of all the horrible gimmicks and ideas that could be spun into that match. Instead the stip has them playing their proposed shitty characters? Left me a little flat, thats all.


Oh, there will be stips in the actual Wrestlecrap match, I just didn't want to overdo that segment this week :) Expect more details next week.
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Viceroy Virus
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The Return of Andre "The Fucking" Giant!
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You had jBL beat in 6:44? Well, I guess that's not all that bad, I guess.
<a href="https://imgur.com/n82v3zw"><img src="https://i.imgur.com/n82v3zw.jpg" title="source: imgur.com" /></a>
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SamoaRowe
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NEW Saturday Night
June 17th 2006


The show opens with a recap of last week’s Undertaker vs. Rock match. This includes the set up for Rock and Undertaker vs. Jericho and Siaki… which will take place right away!

Ernie Rowe and Professor Plague welcome us to another wonderful edition of NEW Saturday Night. They hype up tonight’s big main event, which will be a hardcore match between Mick Foley and Tommy Dreamer.

Match One: Undertaker and Rock vs Chris Jericho and Sonny Siaki

The Rock is eager to tangle up with Jericho, but Siaki insists on starting off on his side. This seems like a foolish move, since Rock overpowers Siaki in the early going, knocking him off his feet several times. Siaki makes a tag to Jericho, who immediately gets a blind low blow in on Rock, giving him the advantage. The next several minutes are devoted to Siaki and Jericho taking turns holding Rock still while the other one beats the tar out of him. Finally, Rock ducks, causing Siaki to inadvertently hit Jericho. This pisses Jericho off, who slaps Siaki. The distraction lets Rock tag in Undertaker, who cleans house on both men. Undertaker isolates Siaki, and hits the Last Ride for the win at 7:45!

Winners: The Rock and Undertaker, ***1/4 (78/90/82)

Rowe: This match makes me wonder why Siaki constantly tries to buddy up to Jericho.

Plague: Its because Jericho is great, and Siaki understands that.

Rowe: Either way, Siaki has been humbled once again… wait a minute!

Rowe is alarmed due to Chris Jericho taking a bat and cracking it over the skull of The Rock. Jericho takes Undertaker down as well. Siaki gets to his feet and hits the Siakalypse on Rock Meanwhile, Jericho uses the chair to bash the Undertaker’s skull in. Siaki tries to celebrate with Jericho, but Jericho threatens to hit him with the chair, so Siaki leaves the ring. Jericho stands over The Rock and can be heard saying “Good luck with your tournament match next week, you pathetic son of a bitch!”

In-ring segment: Foley and Flair’s contract signing.

NEW General Manager, Eric Bischoff, is in the ring. There is a desk set up with a contract on it. Foley and Flair make their entrances, and stand on opposite sides of the desk. Bischoff takes the microphone.

Bischoff: Gentlemen, I am well aware that both of you hate my guts, and to be honest, the feeling is mutual. But we have business to conduct, so I expect both of you to behave in a way becoming of an NEW superstar. This contract states the terms and conditions of your upcoming Wrestlecrap match on June 25th, at River Rumble. The current stipulations state that should Mr. Flair win the match, Mick Foley must be Mason the Mutilator for one month, and he has to at least pretend to be enjoying it. Likewise, if Mr. Foley wins, Ric Flair must be Spartacus for one month, and he must act as if he is enjoying it as well (Flair grimaces). But that is not all, in addition to the match stipulations, there will be a couple of additions to the match itself. (Flair is mouthing “please let me have Dreamer in my corner). First off, this match, being the first ever Wrestlecrap match, will take place in…. the DOG KENNEL OF HELL! That’s right, you will be battling in a cage surrounded by ferocious Doberman dogs! And finally, this match will also be a DOG POO MATCH! That’s right, I believe Mr. Foley has already competed in one of these classic matches. There will be no pin-falls, submissions, or count-outs, the winner will be whoever throws his opponent in the Doberman’s crap first!

Flair: You…have…got… to… JOKING! I’m a sixteen time world champion! I’m the most respected wrestler in the entire world! You cannot expect me to agree to this!

Foley: C’mon, Flair, sounds like fun to me. (Foley signs the contract).

Bischoff: Tell you what, Flair, I can understand why you wouldn’t want to wrestle in this match. But you know what else? You have been a pain in the ass since New England Wrestling started and if you do not sign this contract, I’ll fire your ass so quickly you’ll be begging to play Spartacus.

Flair glares at Bischoff for several seconds, but then signs the contract. Flair then takes the contract and blasts Bischoff in the head with it. Foley jumps Flair but gets hit as well. Foley goes down. Flair takes the microphone again.

Flair: On second thought, Foley, this match will be a shining moment in my career. I’ll expose you for the piece of crap that you are by throwing you into a fresh pile of it. I’ll see you at River Rumble, “Mason.”

Rowe: Oh, the audacity of Ric Flair! I hope Foley teaches him a lesson at River Rumble, I think spending a month as Spartacus could really humble Flair.

Plague: Give me a break, Rowe, how can you stand for the ill treatment of a legend like Flair!

91%

Match Two: The Basham Brothers vs. Kane and Big Show

Big Show and Kane do not like one another, giving the Bashams an edge in this match. Kane and Big Show’s power and size manages to overcome the Bashams for several minutes. This lasts until Doug Basham targets the famously weak knees of the Big Show and the Bashams take turns tagging in and out to violate Big Show’s knee. Kane stands by, but decides he has had enough. He storms the ring, chokeslams both Bashams and his partner as well! Kane storms off, leaving Big Show victim to a double team from the Bashams. Doug pins Big Show at 5:45.

Winners: The Basham Brothers, **1/2 (70/80/76)

Rowe: The Bashams pick up a big victory on their way to the three way tag at River Rumble. They could very well become the first ever NEW Tag Team Champions!

Plague: Kane once again showed that he is too good to hang with the Big Show.

In-ring segment: JBL is on a quest.

John Bradshaw Layfield makes his to the ring. He takes a microphone.

JBL: You know, ever since Steve Corino abandoned New England Wrestling for NWA: Central States Wrestling, I have wondered why he would want to. I mean, New England as a place to live is horrible and the locals’ teeth are greener than the grass on my lawn, but NEW has quickly established itself as being where the big boys play. Let’s face it, this promotion rocks (this actually pops the crowd a bit). I think Steve Corino is a very foolish individual for leaving these green pastures to go to the stink house that is CSW, but there is a man who is his stark opposite. This man decided that CSW wasn’t for him and that NEW was the place to be. But not only did he realize that CSW had an inferior show and inferior fans, but upon arriving here he realized how horrible the CSW locker-room is. So right now I am demanding that Chris Sabin come out here and tell us all about the shady CSW locker-room.

Chris Sabin comes out to the ring. He looks to be ready for a fight if need be.

JBL: Okay, Chris, this may be hard for you to deal with the emotional trauma of having worked at CSW, but I need you to be strong. Tell me about how the politics backstage are killing CSW. Tell me about how the stars need to do sexual favors for advancement. Tell me about how corrupt the management is, particularly President Jamie Geist. Speak up, man!

Sabin: Actually, JBL, I have no idea what makes you think I had any horror stories to tell you. The truth is that CSW is a perfectly fine place to wrestle, I just thought NEW suited my needs more. I wouldn’t knock them, they are doing their own thing and we’re doing our own thing.

JBL: That is the biggest load of crap I have ever heard! You were forced out weren’t you and you are just trying to suck up to President Geist! You know you were on your way to the top there but realized you actually have to work for your spot here. Isn’t that the truth!

Sabin: Chill out, man, go have a glass of water or something. Why are you so out to make CSW into something that its not? I think you’re just pissed that Steve Corino beat your sorry ass and then decided to switch territories before you could find a way to embarrass him so now you’re attacking his new employers. I wasn’t at CSW very long, JBL, but I was there long enough to know that you wouldn’t do any better there than you are here!

JBL: IS THAT SO?!? Well in THAT CASE I have a promise. I don’t have a match for River Rumble. Why don’t you call your little friends over at CSW and tell them THIS! If any one of them has the BALLS to step into the ring with the wrestling god, then all they need to do is simply show up and I’ll beat the HELL out of whoever it is. I will embarrass CSW the way Corino embarrassed me! In fact, I damn well hope Corino shows his sorry face here again so I clothesline him straight to HELL!

Rowe: JBL has issued an open challenge to anyone from NWA:CSW!

Plague: Do you think anyone from CSW would dare step up against JBL?

Rowe: I don’t know, that would only encourage JBL.

83%

Match Three: Christian Cage and Shark Boy vs. Edge and Gregory Helms

The Christian/Edge feud continues with this match, where each man chose a tag team partner. It turns into a fun spot match, as both teams make quick tags, keeping the action fast paced and fresh. Shark Boy gets some fun offense in on Edge, which infuriates him. Edge removes the turnbuckle padding and tries to drop Shark Boy’s head on the exposed steel. Shark Boy counters, causing Edge is be slightly busted open. Edge tags in Helms, who hits a shining wizard on Shark Boy. Christian makes the blind tag and hits the Unprettier on Helms for the win at 6:00.

Winners: Christian Cage and Shark Boy, **3/4 (68/73/80)

Rowe: Christian Cage continues to impress. Next week Christian will be in the fight of his life when he meets Chris Jericho in the semifinals of the NEW Championship tournament!

Backstage Interview with The Rock

Iron Troy Cumings is backstage with The Rock. He asks The Rock how he feels about what Chris Jericho did to him and the Undertaker earlier. The Rock says that regardless of circumstances, he wants to wrestle Chris Jericho at River Rumble. He says it may happen courtesy of the tournament, but if one or both of them lose their semifinal matches next week, he wants the match to happen anyway. The Rock feels that it has been too long since Chris Jericho had a good sized boot lodged up his ass and he needs to remember what it feels like.

100%

Match Four: Mick Foley vs. Tommy Dreamer (hardcore match)

Dreamer and Foley each bring weapons to the ring. Dreamer has his signature kendo stick, while Foley has his baseball bat wrapped up with barbed wire. Foley swings at Dreamer, who ducks and cracks the kendo stick across Foley’s gut. Dreamer cracks it again over Foley’s back and goes for the cover. Foley kicks out and mounts a comeback against Dreamer. Foley hits his signature over the ropes clothesline, and they hit the ringside area hard. They brawl over to the announce table, where Foley takes a monitor and nails Dreamer in the head. Foley sets Dreamer up on the table for a piledrive, but Dreamer counters and hits the Dreamer Driver! The table is destroyed! Dreamer goes for the cover, but Foley kicks out. Dreamer sets Foley up for a piledriver on the ring steps, but Foley counters it and drops Dreamer on the steps back first. Dreamer crawls back into the ring for a safer environment, but Foley takes the opportunity to grab “Barbie.” Foley hits Dreamer with the evil weapon several times before putting Mr. Socko on and taking Dreamer out with the mandible claw. Dreamer submits at 13:13!

Winner: Mick Foley, ***3/4 (74/84/83)

After the match, Flair tries running in, but thinks twice when he sees Foley wielding “Barbie.” The show ends with Foley posing over a bloodied Tommy Dreamer.

Rowe: That was a horrific match we just witnessed!

Plague: That was a sickening reminder of why Foley is the hardcore legend and why Dreamer is the “Innovator of Violence!”

Rowe: It’s been a wild ride folks, but don’t forget to tune in next week! The NEW Championship semifinal matches will take place as Christian Cage will battle Chris Jericho and The Rock faces Kane!

Plague: It will set up the main event for River Rumble, you won’t want to miss it!

Overall: 79

We got a 2.14 rating for 'NEW Saturday Night!'!
The attendance level was 2509 people.
We made $75270 from ticket sales.
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SamoaRowe
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NEW management would like to send a special congratulations to the success of Brian Kendrick, Jerrelle Clark, and Sonjay Dutt in NWA: Mexico. NEW is proud to be represented by these three talents and look forward to their returns to New England Wrestling.
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SamoaRowe
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Hey folks. Due to time constraints, no internet at my home, and a big ass standardized test I need to take on Saturday, I'm just going to post my show results for now and then write the show properly on Monday or Tuesday. River Rumble is being held on June 25th and I've ran it through EWR already. I will post that show on Monday or Tuesday as well.

But for now, here are the quick results for the final NEW Saturday Night before River Rumble.

NEW Saturday Night
June 24th 2006


In a semifinal tournament match, Chris Jericho defeated Christian Cage, thanks to an assist from Edge. After the match, Edge beat the holy hell out of Christian, took a microphone and told Christian that they will be squaring off at River Rumble.

Backstage, Chris Jericho confronts The Rock, bragging that he has made it to the tournament finals and that the only way he will wrestle The Rock at River Rumble is if Rock can beat Kane their semifinal match.

Team 3D beat the debuting Gene Snitsky and Andrew Martin. The match was surprisingly good, as all four men are capable brawlers. After the match, America's Most Wanted layed out Team 3D.

Mick Foley cut a promo in the ring promising to humiliate Ric Flair in their Wrestlecrap match at River Rumble. Foley said he thinks the match will be a lot of fun, but he has no intentions of losing the match and being forced to be called "Mason The Mutilator" for a month.

D'Lo Brown and Tajiri defeated Gregory Helms and Shawn Daivari, earning them a NEW Tag Team Championship match next week on Saturday Night.

Sonny Siaki cut a promo in the ring, saying he was outraged at how he's been treated by the "big stars" in New England Wrestling. Siaki says he will make an impact and he will do this by wrestling The Undertaker at River Rumble. This bring out The Undertaker, on his motorcycle, and he chases Siaki out of the ring.

In the NEW Championship semifinal tournament match, The Rock defeated Kane when the Big Show interfered. Kane and Big Show brawled after the match, while Chris Jericho appeared on the stage to have a staredown. It becomes official, as Ernie Rowe announces that Kane will face Big Show at River Rumble and the main event will Chris Jericho vs. The Rock for the NEW Championship!

As mentioned before, full results will be posted on Monday or Tuesday.
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