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dt is here
Topic Started: Mar 25 2009, 04:28 PM (103 Views)
Dark Trooper
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BORAT BORAT BORAT
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For some reason I'm bound to, unconsciously, revisit these forums every year or so. It holds many important milestones and memories I will never be able to forget. Anytime anything... relevant happens in my life, I know I can just come here and write to an empty box, which you all will eventually fill up with kind words.

After the tough breakup I had more than a year ago, from a 9-month relationship, I thought I had completely moved on. I was convinced she had been inconsiderate and hurtful to a point in which I actually had to get away from her as much as I could, for my own good. I still had feelings for her and, knowing it would lead to nothing but pain, I ignored her and her attempts to maintain a friendship. Worst mistake ever and I will tell you why later.
She broke up with me because of a guy, six years older than her, who, in every opportunity he had, reminded her he had feelings for her. This plan worked out pretty well for him. She started having doubts and getting closer and closer to him as a friend and ended up breaking up our relationship so she could be with him. This is one of the worst things a girl can do to a guy. I felt so inferior and powerless, so torn apart... undescribable, really.
So I let her live her life and put myself in a position she wouldn't even try to reach me as a friend.
Around five months later, she started trying to talk to me again. She said she had changed (she actually did, but not for the best, as I would realize later), wanted to mend our friendship, crap like that. I fell for it. Not much time had passed, when she confessed she was looking for a more stable and caring love relationship, that she wasn't getting that from him, and that she started to have feelings for me again. :-/ <- this was, literally, my reaction.
Of course I had not forgotten her. I merely kept my distance so I wouldn't get hurt anymore and never worked things out with her. So I started to have feelings for her again and so we resumed from the point our relationship was left out. I can't quite explain it, but it was like we both were able to forget the 'gap' between both occasions. We just kept dating like those ~5 months didn't ever exist.
I could just resume the next 12 months as "greatest ones in my life" and the one after that as "I've never suffered this much in my life". Basically, she broke up with me again, this time because her feelings for me weren't the same, they were fading, and she felt we could be nothing more than friends.
I accepted it, but I was devastated. 9 months plus other 13, these were almost two whole years of my life in which I made our happiness my priority. I gave all my love to her. I was the best boyfriend a girl could ever have. And yet, she just didn't feel the same I felt for her. What went wrong... I just don't (didn't) know.
Ever since, she has been getting closer and closer to, surprise, that guy I told you about earlier. Apparently ever since they started talking to eachother again (around our 6th month), he insisted on telling her he liked her.
Now, I knew they had started talking to eachother. Why didn't I just made her choose... "Me or him!". I just couldn't do that to her. And she had assured me he was just a friend, and because he didn't try anything suspicious, I ended up accepting him as just one of her friends.

So yea. This was three days ago.

Lesson 1: Don't, ever, be this serious about a relationship, DT. It will just end up hurting you more than it should.
Lesson 2: You should always talk things out with your exes, and never think you can be simply a friend for him/her. From my experience, it is impossible.
Lesson 3: It feels good to talk about our problems.

~DT
Edited by Dark Trooper, Mar 25 2009, 04:29 PM.
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Death Knight
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It is in Men that we must place our hope.
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Woah, quite a retort indeed.
I have to admit i'm suprised you've posted this here, especially after all these months that have passed by, But were all friends here, it's good once in a while to let loose i guess.

I'll keep it short and just say that she wont be the last woman you'll have for a gf, through all the misgivings and errors you'll gain some valuable experience. It'll stand you in good stead for any future relationship you may wish to have. Dont let it get to you mate, i'm sure there'll be more pleasent suprises in the future for you. You'll settle down and the rest will be history, young at heart and 'all i suppose.

On another note, i've just also popped on for a little look. Glad you're still here somewhat, i hope sometime in the future everyone else will gradully find there way back here and we can all have a good laugh again!

- Your pal, Tony.
Form is temporary, class is permanent. Cheers gaffa!
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*random funny quote coming soon*
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Morais
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RM
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Hello. Yeah, surprisingly I'm back... I suddenly remembered this place existed, and decided to drop by. So... Looks like my english is very bad these days, 'cause I haven't been getting much practice, just listening to music and stuff isn't enough after all.

So... I bow to you DT, you expressed yourself very well in your post. Regarding your situation, I just want to say I had a 9 month relationship with a great girl, and it ended with me telling her my feelings for her were dead. It was very fucked up because it wasn't the first time I stopped liking someone just like that. So she cried a lot, I felt like disappearing and hurting/humiliating/whatever myself and now I'm back on track, wishing that I never fall in love again.

Most of all, I think it is crucial to create good friendships in this life. Love is so unpredictable, you never know when it's going to end, and in the meantime you're spendind your time with that special someone, time you will think about later and ask yourself "if it was going to end anyways, wouldn't it be better if I had been with my friends instead?". After breaking up and feeling the need to be with my beloved friends I realized the passionate kind of love is not what I'm looking for.

The end.

So, how are you guys doing? I'm in my second year at university, a pretty good one I suppose, and I'm hoping to become an environmental engineer. Things are looking good, I'm getting a scholarship for my performance in the first year, but I'm also very focused on living my life well, trying to have fun and strengthen the bonds with the people I love. Stuff like that. Also, I intend to learn how to play the guitar, which has been a dream of mine for a long time.

I also play the new pokemon games from time to time, maybe I'll be at Shoddybattle for a while in my summer vacations. Maybe, lol.

And that's all, peace to you guys.
Edited by Morais, May 30 2009, 11:17 AM.
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Ixion[gsc]: pidgey is a dumb bird who shits on trainers heads
Ixion[gsc]: that's why ash has always got a cape

Sir DK: well uu can be unpredictable
RM: not when it's me playing
RM: =o
Sir DK: you know all the movesets and everthing? o.o
RM: i'm just saying I suck at it
Sir DK: oh
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