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Worst Finisher in E-wrestling?; I got to sell this?
Topic Started: Nov 18 2005, 02:01 AM (4,282 Views)
JeremyS
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MUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!
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Buse,Nov 20 2005
11:59 AM
Which mother fucker said the claw was a bad finisher?

I'll kill that bastard, so help me God...I'll kill that bastard.

Ripping on the claw (or anything vaguely Von Erich-related) is a capital offense in Texas. Along with being a Sooners fan, voting for a liberal, and driving while sober. They'll gut you and hang you from a tree. Provided they're sober enough to find a tree.


Jeremy S.
(just shut out Oklahoma in Norman on his PS2, Buse would have shed tears of joy)


PS - Truth is stranger than fiction: nothing's worse than the Worm.
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keenings
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Guards! Seize him!!
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All right, all right, I openly confess that I rip on poor Joel's creations but... there was just so much ammunition with Jessie Muldoon that wrestlecrap.com could devote an entire wing to the guy.

This may not be the worst of all time but check out the following from when Muldoon donned a mask and wrestled as DOOMSDAY. And no, there was no redeeming features as found with the beloved DOOM (who was far superior in a completely different way).

Quote:
 
The Dark Mark - DOOMSDAY stands the opponent up, hooks their arms as if he was going for a Powerbomb, he then lifts the opponent up into the air, spins them around and then drives the oppnent to the mat with a Powerbomb Piledriver..


That's a direct cut-and-paste from the app so the poor spelling and grammar is original. And while the concept for the move itself may, if I could ever figure it out, be not so bad, it's the description of it that makes it nonsensical.

I dunno, am I just being spiteful here?

Patrickus Lurkus
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In the old BSCW a guy had a finisher that just had a bad name...it was the Hospitalizationalizer or something like that.
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dalbellorage
Carl Brutananadilewski
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keenings,Nov 22 2005
09:41 AM
All right, all right, I openly confess that I rip on poor Joel's creations but... there was just so much ammunition with Jessie Muldoon that wrestlecrap.com could devote an entire wing to the guy.

This may not be the worst of all time but check out the following from when Muldoon donned a mask and wrestled as DOOMSDAY.  And no, there was no redeeming features as found with the beloved DOOM (who was far superior in a completely different way).

Quote:
 
The Dark Mark - DOOMSDAY stands the opponent up, hooks their arms as if he was going for a Powerbomb, he then lifts the opponent up into the air, spins them around and then drives the oppnent to the mat with a Powerbomb Piledriver..


That's a direct cut-and-paste from the app so the poor spelling and grammar is original. And while the concept for the move itself may, if I could ever figure it out, be not so bad, it's the description of it that makes it nonsensical.

I dunno, am I just being spiteful here?

Patrickus Lurkus

A trifle spiteful. :D Basically the guy's going for a double underhook powerbomb then on the hoist he spins the guy 180 in the air and brings them down in a sit-out piledriver.

It might be quite the stunt and impossible in real pro wrestling, but then aren't most e-wrestling finishing sequences and finishers?
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dalbellorage
Carl Brutananadilewski
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I still don't know if there's a finisher worse than my Pizzazz's Hand of Hate finisher. Which was basically a series of bitch slaps that either earned a submission or left you too stunned to avoid the pin. I actually took it from a video game called Time Fighters or something where the Jeanne d'Arc character had a bitch slap clinching manoeuvre.

Yessir, Pizzazz was a bad bitch. :D At least I had her use a tilt-a-whirl piledriver before she used the hand. Oh, how glorious early 90s e-wrestling was.

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StygianSmileyFace
Sir Loin
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WILDHack,Nov 20 2005
03:51 PM
You gotta get in line behind the other guy. And I'll say it again damn the claw damn the wright brothers and damn you!

It.... It's the Claw? How can someone not think that the Claw is dangerous? It... I mean... It's the Claw?

And the Garvin Stomp? I mean.

*sigh* Life just isn't worth living.
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Picky
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Now let us retreat wench, for tonight, we feast on snobbery...
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The Preston Mayfield Manifesto: a leg lace horribly applied.

Worst finisher ever.
Have I told you how much I loathe your continued existence today?

Proud member of the Quote Pyramid Builders Union Local #317
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Mr. B,
Unregistered

A long time ago in a federation far, far away.. well, New York actually,, and th eFed was called WAR! ( a bad start already, I know..)

A good friend of mine submitted a one joke character called 'The Fur King' Juan Kerr. His gimmick was that he was a big time animal trapper with an obsession for fur.

No, really.

HGe was never seen without his 'Fur Kit', with included, amongst other bad jokes, a 'Fur Cue', (a fur handled pool cue which he used to whack opponents round the noggin) and a 'Fur Cup' (a big silver trophy.. covered in fur).

His finisher, god forbid... was the Fur Cough.

Imagine Tajiri's mist, but instead of the mist the guy coughs up a hairball in his opponents face. Worst. E-finisher. Ever.

Frighteningly, despite the fact that the guy was intended from the start to be nothing but a joke, he got over bg time. The Fur Cough knocked people out cold, and NO-ONE ever kicked out from it.

RF, if you're out there.. I hate you still. :)
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dalbellorage
Carl Brutananadilewski
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Okay, some had a worse finisher than the Hand of Hate. The Fur Cough. I like that, actually.
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SteinarB
Monstermothman
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Mr. B,,Mar 14 2006
08:14 PM
A long time ago in a federation far, far away.. well, New York actually,, and th eFed was called WAR! ( a bad start already, I know..)

A good friend of mine submitted a one joke character called 'The Fur King' Juan Kerr.  His gimmick was that he was a big time animal trapper with an obsession for fur.

No, really.

HGe was never seen without his 'Fur Kit', with included, amongst other bad jokes,  a 'Fur Cue', (a fur handled pool cue which he used to whack opponents round the noggin) and a  'Fur Cup' (a big silver trophy.. covered in fur).

His finisher, god forbid... was the Fur Cough.

Imagine Tajiri's mist, but instead of the mist the guy coughs up a hairball in his opponents face.  Worst.  E-finisher.  Ever.

Frighteningly, despite the fact that the guy was intended from the start to be nothing but a joke, he got over bg time.  The Fur Cough knocked people out cold, and NO-ONE ever kicked out from it.

RF, if you're out there.. I hate you still. :)

Ah, the Fur Cough. The memories come flooding back. The horrible, horrible memories! :) One of my characters, Sid Starr, has the dubious distinction of having been the only character to ever be _hospitalized_ for several months by the Fur Cough.

Yeah, I should probably hop on over to England to hunt down Roger and Jake for some payback for that one some day. :)
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Is Mr.B....Mike Parkinson aka Lord Byron?
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Mr. B
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Anything's possible in the wonderful world of e-wrestling ;)
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JViotlo
Unregistered

A personal favorite of mine...the "T-Vault" from a guy named T-Train.

If memory serves it was a shoulder tackle...but the best part is the guy would "rev" up like a train...or the Godfather's "Ho Train" splash.

I made a joke wrestler that was an old-school wrestler tht was down on his luck. His name was Tom "Shooter" O'Reilly. His finisher was "The Irish Remedy"...a sleeperhold. He ran was a guy named Micky Douglas...who used the dreaded "Closed Fist" as a finisher.

They didn't go too far...but it was DAMN fun writing O'Reilly's promos. It made Hulk Hogan's and Ultimate Warrior's shit look like GOLD. Nothing like a promo full of "bro", "dude", "cool", and other 80's slang.
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DTPTrey
Emory
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The CLAW! :) I use to have DTP use the claw as his primary finisher for a while. The only reason was that everyone else had their guys doing the most unrealistic moves ever like the triple somersault piledrivers off the top rope. I'm not even sure if he ever won a match with the claw move. It more or less became a mid match move that the guys writing always put over. I have no clue why.

LONG LIVE THE DREAMLOVER CLAWHOLD!!!!

TRACE
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Vile Side
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Keith
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In my continued pursuit of wrestlecrap I'll drop Vile's finisher out there.

The Satan's strut is a fargo strut into an eye gouge.


Awesome... if you like the fargo strut.


...But at the end of the day it's still an eye gouge.
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