| Welcome to JTF Squaretable. We hope you enjoy your visit. You're currently viewing our forum as a guest. This means you are limited to certain areas of the board and there are some features you can't use. If you join our community, you'll be able to access member-only sections, and use many member-only features such as customizing your profile, sending personal messages, and voting in polls. Registration is simple, fast, and completely free. Join our community! If you're already a member please log in to your account to access all of our features: |
| [bannedsycho] hEllo WorlD | |
|---|---|
| Tweet Topic Started: Dec 20 2011, 04:59 PM (200 Views) | |
| sychosys | Dec 20 2011, 04:59 PM Post #1 |
This Space For Rent
  ![]](http://z5.ifrm.com/static/1/pip_r.png)
|
[The shot features the head and shoulders of Joe Petrow in a plain white t-shirt and week-old stubble, with the IIWF Championship Belt hanging on the wall in the distance] JP: Did ya miss me? Fact is, I didn't really miss you. After what happened a couple of months ago, I was pretty fed up with everything. I figured that none of you people appreciated me, or the things that I was trying to do for you. But then I caught that moment of SuperClash...on YouTube of course, as I didn't watch that tripe live. But, in the midst of total blackness, one spark of light appeared in the form of a young man, who probably traveled from far away, as Memphis is world-renowned for having the stupidest fans in the business, but anyway, this was a young man who attempted to call out the AWA on their bullshit. Now, if you cared enough to find and watch this video, then you deserve an explanation for why I was booted from the AWA so suddenly. You see, Royalty already had the tag team titles, and there was no escaping from the fact that they were going to *have* to give Mark Langseth his long overdue title shot. So, in a very short time, yours truly, Joe Petrow, was going to be running the show in the AWA. But the thing about me that you all know already is that, this mouth here [points to his mouth and shakes his head for emphasis] doesn't come with a filter. The things I'm thinking, they come straight out. And, just before I get the AWA by the testicles, I started talking about the tip of the iceberg of things that are wrong in that place. Somebody realized what was about to happen. And they didn't go with the pepper spray foreplay; they went straight to the AK-47. They fired me and banned me from the buildings. They banned Mark Langseth from the buildings. They took Dave Cooper and EMS, who didn't heed my warnings to bail out, screwed them at the Stampede Cup, screwed them out of their titles, and *then* banned them from the buildings. And just like that, Royalty was not only gone, they were practically erased from history. Like Chinese democracy, the AWA have worked their asses off to preserve the illusion. You want to know what's really going on? Then just open your eyes, because it's there for everyone to see. When Mark Langseth came to the AWA, it was the place where the greatest wrestlers in the world were coming together to ply their craft. That's what brought guys like Dave and Eric in. And that's even what got me to come out of retirement to be a part of. But somehow, that wasn't good enough for the AWA. They decided appealing to intelligent, discriminating, adult wrestling fans wasn't good enough for them. They wanted to bring in the kiddies. They wanted to turn professional wrestling into some family friendly sports entertainment, as if would be appropriate for any mother to have their young Teletubbies watching child watch Jackson Haynes' forehead bleed like a faucet. But their minds were made up. In came the clowns. The bumblebees. The ethnic stereotypes. The fat, G-rated rappers. Rainbow Brite refugees from "the future" [Yes, Petrow makes those stupid quote marks with his fingers...] The AWA was determined to dumb this operation down to the level of the dumbest fans to be dredged up from the South. Rehashing all of the stuff from the 80's that insulted my intelligence, and made me so god-damned embarassed to be a wrestling fan. All the things that I swore I'd fight against as a wrestler myself. Instead, I'm ashamed to admit that I went along with it. I had the greatest wrestler in the world dressing up in capes and crowns, and riding on a stupid paper mache throne. We were all spouting royal puns that made me cringe. But I bit my lip and went played the game that they wanted, because when the AWA National Championship would come under control, we would finally have the power to change all of that. But, of course, they wouldn't let that happen. And you saw that stupid, face-painted goof take Mr. Langseth's rightful spot wrestling for the championship that controls the fate of professional wrestling. I could talk for hours about all of the problems with the AWA, but the solution to all of them starts at the same point: Bring back Mark Langseth. And give the undefeated, undisputed, Hall of Fame legend, his well deserved title shot. [Petrow stands up, backs away from the camera until most of his body is in view, then, while speaking, slowly raises his arms perpendicular to his body whilst letting his head flop loosely to his side.] JP: Man-With-Duct-Tape-Over-His-Mouth, I have heard your silent cry, and I am rededicating myself to the cause. Whatever my sins are, and only the AWA brass knows how they are greater than those the likes of James Monosso and William Craven have orchestrated, the only thing that Mark Langseth is guilty of is being the best. Of being with the AWA since the beginning and never losing a match. In over three years. Not one, single, god-damned match. [Petrow slowly drops his self-crucifix pose and walks back, returning to a head shot on the screen] I've been fired, and that's not going to change, but there are still things that I can do from the outside. If you believe in the cause, then I ask two things of you. First, don't forget about us; and don't let us be forgotten. Don't let the AWA forget what they don't want you to know. And subscribe to this YouTube channel, bannedsycho. Because you can bet that I'll have more to say and show you when the time is right. You, my friends, line up the targets for me...and I'll shoot. [Petrow points to the camera, makes the sign of a gun, and softly whispers "bang." while "pulling the trigger", as the video abruptly ends.] |
 |
 
|
| Overly_Critical_Jue | Dec 20 2011, 06:08 PM Post #2 |
Amigo, I ain't anybody but Juan Vasquez!
|
tl;dr |
|
|
|
| JeremySAtWork | Dec 21 2011, 03:06 PM Post #3 |
|
Unregistered
|
*subscribes* |
|
|
|
 ZetaBoards gives you all the tools to create a successful discussion community. |
|
| « Previous Topic · AWA · Next Topic » |
11:35 AM Jul 13