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| [bannedsycho] 2nite's Story is Somewhat Unique | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: Jan 21 2012, 09:33 AM (168 Views) | |
| sychosys | Jan 21 2012, 09:33 AM Post #1 |
This Space For Rent
  ![]](http://z5.ifrm.com/static/1/pip_r.png)
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[A horrible HD image of a pudgy faced man with a dizzying array of hideous scars criss-crossing all over his face, made even more horrible for the people who knew him as the baby-faced "Majestic" Maurice McArthur, but made a little less horrible by the fact that that face is actually smiling.] 4M: Hello Petrow marks! This is the man who beat Billy Shakespeare, Randy Acorn, and Chris Quigley in the Double Eye, the man who used the "Blood, Breasts and Beers" motto to beat Jason Keening and rise to the top of the SCRA, and the man who took a mad eunuch and used him to become a TWO TIME! TWO TIME! Tag Team Champion of the WOOOOORLD! 4M himself, Mr. Majestyk Maurice McArthur! And after all those leagues collapsed, there wasn't a single damned fed in North America who dared try to handle me! Just when I was about to go back to flipping burgers, Petrow found me a gig in Death Japan Pro Wrestling. Ain't a single other gaijin ever lasted six months in DJPW, but I just finished up 10 YEARS, longer than even any of the Japanese boys! I'm *still* the only man to ever kick out of a direct C5 explosion to the face...though the 22 chair shots to the head afterwards was enough to keep me down for the count... Anyway, you're probably wondering why I'm here flapping my gums instead of the guy you came here to see. Petrow tells me he'll edit in a cut scene when I say so, so...SO! [The video cuts to a scene from the protest of the last video:] [The Iranian is wild-eyed with rage as he lunges forth, blasting Petrow with a front elbow smash that takes the former World Champion off-guard. Sharif grasps Petrow's neck in bothhands, and hamers him straight in the jaw with his forehead, landing on top of him as Petrow falls back.] [Back to 4M] 4M: So yeah, that headbutt by that Iranian broke Petrow's jaw, so he's got his gums wired shut for awhile. He wrote that he found somebody else to fill in, but his future endeavored ass didn't show up, so instead he got in touch with his longtime partner...no, not like _that_, get yer goddamned mind of the gutter! Anyway, he filled me in on it all and asked me to say a few words for you while he's sipping soup from a straw. [McArthur takes a second to spit his chewing tobacco into a nearby wastebasket, and his speech becomes a little more understandable.] 4M: Well, if there was no place in North America for me before, it sure sounds like things have only gotten worse. All that talent that the AWA gets their hands on, and they handicap them with all sorts of restrictions and hokey gimmicks. Goddamned Caleb Temple looked like a freaking school girl compared to his old self. Ain't no wonder that this AWA can't win any wrestling awards, making a guy like Temple watch his words and his actions instead of letting the guy entertain people the best way he knows how! The guys who put wings on this bird wanted to bring back the wrestling of their youth. I get it. The rose-colored glasses, the "things were so much back then" feelings. And in small doses, retro is fun. But these guys have been around what, four years now? That's an eternity in wrestling these days. There ain't nothing that stays cool for four years anymore. If you want to survive, you've got to evolve. You've got to get with the times. You've got to go balls to the wall with everything you've got, and not stay captive to some romantic vision that stifles your creativity! Unfortunately, there's only one guy in the whole AWA organization who knows what needs to be done, and he's not willing to come to the forefront to fix it. Well, I ain't never gonna get a run with those guys, so I'll come out and say it. The guy who put the Double Eye out of business with a goddamned smile on his face knows what needs to be done! Bring Petrow back, bring Langseth back, bring back everyone they can that knows how to entertain people, and take the goddamned shackles off! The time to be quaint and restrained is over! It's time to take wrestling back to the 21st century, where it belongs! And if you're feeling that same way, then get your hands out from under your ass and do something about it! Signs, chants, whatever things that your predecessor fans in the 90's used to do to empower themselves, make your voices heard so that they can't keep ignoring you anymore! [McArthur spits back into his wastebasket and wipes his face with his hairy forearm, paying no mind to the mess it leaves] 4M: Well, I'm not really a promo guy, and Petrow tells me that the Jews will get angry if I talk too long...damn, the Jews AND the Muslims hate this guy!? Anyway, if yer ever down in Nagasaki, come check out 4M's Steakhouse! I'll throw in an extra plate of my famous deep-fried grizzle on the house! [The freakish face with the surprisingly charming grin flashes a big thumbs up to the camera, and the video ends abruptly.] |
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| Overly_Critical_Jue | Jan 21 2012, 11:44 AM Post #2 |
Amigo, I ain't anybody but Juan Vasquez!
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4M wants The Meatman to fix things!? |
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| BigPoppaBuyrate | Jan 21 2012, 12:37 PM Post #3 |
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Poppin' Buyrates Since 1996
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I have to point out that I think it's kinda funny that both Petrow and I sent our jobbers to Japan to become death match workers as that's the same story I gave for Maniac Jack. |
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| sychosys | Jan 21 2012, 05:30 PM Post #4 |
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This Space For Rent
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And we both stole the idea from Cactus Jack! At least the Cornette Seven Year Statute of Limitations was observed... |
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11:35 AM Jul 13