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Random Thoughts about the UWF; Because these things pop into my head
Topic Started: Jul 1 2009, 04:05 PM (7,205 Views)
Overly_Critical_Jue
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Amigo, I ain't anybody but Juan Vasquez!
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Some random thoughts post-Gold Rush...

-When the hell did Juan Vasquez have time to shave his head after getting attacked? Did there just happen to be a barber shop inside Ford Field?
-Alex Epstein took 18 chairshots from Vasquez. "Might get bludgeoned" is kind of an understatement, Amy Marshall.
-Am I the only one who thinks of Gandalf or Moses whenever I read Gabriel Whitecross rps/matches/promos? I keep imagining he's this Zeus-like white bearded dude with a voice that booms like thunder.
-How did Nikki the Cat win the protege, again? You go through this long, drawn out process to get the creme de la creme and somehow wind up with the most incompetent one of all.
-Kyle Lee must have got one hell of a payoff from winning the CL Cup if he's got enough money to run two promotions.
-So, how did that post-win celebration for Trey DaMann go? Did they just prop up his corpse in the corner while everyone else partied, or what?
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RedRajah
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Shocked Woona is Shocked
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Overly_Critical_Jue,Jan 7 2010
05:55 PM
Some random thoughts post-Gold Rush...

-When the hell did Juan Vasquez have time to shave his head after getting attacked? Did there just happen to be a barber shop inside Ford Field?

Shave & a Haircut!
And here's where I pretend to be a writer...
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Overly_Critical_Jue
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Amigo, I ain't anybody but Juan Vasquez!
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Yeesh. If UWF was like WoW, Alex Epstein would draw aggro constantly and Trey DaMann would be one of those lvl 1 noobs that stumbled onto the wrong server and constantly gets killed.
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RedRajah
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Shocked Woona is Shocked
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Overly_Critical_Jue,Jan 7 2010
06:27 PM
Yeesh. If UWF was like WoW, Alex Epstein would draw aggro constantly and Trey DaMann would be one of those lvl 1 noobs that stumbled onto the wrong server and constantly gets killed.

Would that make Tumaffi be Hogger?
And here's where I pretend to be a writer...
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Overly_Critical_Jue
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Amigo, I ain't anybody but Juan Vasquez!
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This may now quite possibly be the nerdiest thread in the whole forum.

And that's saying something.
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Flouzemaker
The Luther Burger
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Overly_Critical_Jue,Jan 7 2010
05:49 PM
This may now quite possibly be the nerdiest thread in the whole forum.

And that's saying something.

If I stumble upon a pocket pencil holder and/or nasal spray sale, I'll spread the word.
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Mozeart
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Sheik-ee, Sheik-ee, give me your answer do...
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blibblab,Oct 19 2009
01:57 PM
Flouzemaker,Oct 10 2009
02:41 PM
Tommy Stephens is Samoan, which is not the same thing.

Actually, Tommy Stephens is... maybe German-American? Well, white European. He just took up the whole Samoan tag after purchasing a small parcel of land in American Samoa so he could be a "Samoan Citizen" and tap into the awesomely powerful skills that comes with being a Samoan.

Johnny Axis is 1/2 Australian Aboriginine and 1/2 African Pygmy, but you wouldn't know it 'cause he's also a shaven-headed albino with very tall shoe lifts.

Also martian.
And it was at this moment that the entire world realized, in unison, that tandem bicycles were AWESOME~!
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keenings
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Guards! Seize him!!
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Overly_Critical_Jue,Jan 7 2010
04:55 PM
-Am I the only one who thinks of Gandalf or Moses whenever I read Gabriel Whitecross rps/matches/promos? I keep imagining he's this Zeus-like white bearded dude with a voice that booms like thunder.

Combine that with his theme music (Nuclear Assault's "Something Wicked This Way Comes") and you'll see why I've been a Whitecross mark since 1997.
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Overly_Critical_Jue
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Amigo, I ain't anybody but Juan Vasquez!
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Random thoughts following the reveal of that monstrosity of a roster...

-Seriously, did Kyle Lee win a billion dollars from the CL Cup or something? How the hell is he paying all these people?
-Juan Vasquez's contract was always described as "the highest salary on the roster...plus one dollar." Those checks better not be bouncing, damnit.
-30 women wrestlers on the roster? No wonder I can't even get my foot in the front door.
-There's no one with a terminal illness on the MBC roster, right?
-The people that run the UWF must REALLY REALLY hate Rick Marley, huh?
-Out of everyone in that main event, only Vasquez doesn't hold a title. By proxy, we can assume he's the real UWF world champion and Trey DaMann is only champion in name only...he still doesn't want any part of Zeus Whitecross.
-How long are these cards now? 8 hours? Yeesh.
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ratrangerm
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Aging veteran
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Vengeance is insane... so while not terminally ill, he is mentally ill.

And the real thought to ask is this: Does Juan Vasquez even KNOW what he has gotten himself into?!
"Just as I discovered the meaning of life, it changed." -- George Carlin
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Overly_Critical_Jue
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Amigo, I ain't anybody but Juan Vasquez!
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You think Juan Vasquez is sane? He's got split personalities!

His life is a hazy mess of rage punches, acting normal around Tommy Stephens and trying to save wrestling in Texas.
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texanspaniard
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The Luther Burger
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To be fair you only get a trophy and (now retroactively) 2 spots for the company you represent for the next year's tournament when you win the CL Cup. Maybe he sold the trophy!!!! How could you Kyle?!!
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Overly_Critical_Jue
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Amigo, I ain't anybody but Juan Vasquez!
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That trophy must have been made from unobtainium.
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JeremySatwork
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Overly_Critical_Jue,Jan 8 2010
02:30 PM
That trophy must have been made from unobtainium.

They dug up a Samoan's grave and carved it from his skull.
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Overly_Critical_Jue
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Amigo, I ain't anybody but Juan Vasquez!
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JeremySatwork,Jan 8 2010
11:37 AM
Overly_Critical_Jue,Jan 8 2010
02:30 PM
That trophy must have been made from unobtainium.

They dug up a Samoan's grave and carved it from his skull.

Impossible. The only material hard enough to carve into a Samoan's skull...is a blade crafted...from a Samoan skull.
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