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Miyuki and Penny's Excellent Adventure; An unreleased UWF rp
Topic Started: Jun 7 2013, 02:03 PM (192 Views)
Overly_Critical_Jue
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Amigo, I ain't anybody but Juan Vasquez!
[ *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
So, while cleaning out my in-box, I stumbled upon this rp that was meant to have been used for the last unreleased UWF card. It was the first in a three part adventure that would have eventually involved Tesla St. James. It would've been like the movie Get him to The Greek, with Penny in charge of getting Miyuki and Tesla to the arena in time for the card. Part One is springing Miyuki out of jail(she and Tesla had gotten locked up after their street brawl on the previous card). Part two would've been picking up a hitchhiking Tesla and having various cuts and edits showing the deep joo joo they ended up getting into and part three would've been arriving at the arena. Kinda sad we never got to finish it. Anyhow...enjoy this piece of Flouze/Jue insanity.
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[Fade in. Voices. And feet. The camera follows two pair of unidentified
feet as they make their way down a long corridor in well polished men's
boots and business-appropriate heels.]

Male voice: "I mean, she might've been let go when we let the redhead
go, but she...well, you've seen the list of charges."

Female voice: "Listen, I know about all the shady history. And the
weird youtube stuff. She's fluent in fifteen languages, yet can't
speak English properly. She knows a Tupi-Guarani dialect exclusive to
the Yanaigua and speaks it like a native."

Male voice: "She speaks what?"

Female voice: "Yanaigua."

[By the cut and color of his pants, it can be surmized that the male
voice belongs to an officer of the law. The woman, perhaps a lawyer,
sighs.]

Female voice: "It's one of those uncontacted tribes. No clue how or
why she pulled that one off..."

Male voice: "Regardless, we checked her background. She's currently
on a flight ban and she comes up
as the author of several banned cultist manifestos."

Female voice: "No, no... She just wrote a series of best-selling young
adult romance novels when she was fourteen. Something must have gone
wrong in the translation because weird cults spontaneously began
springing up across Southeast Asia, basing their lives around the
teachings contained in the books. All pretty lame, if you ask me.
Japanese equivalent to Stephenie Meyer, that's all. Rest assured no
sparkly vampires are involved."

Male voice: "Yeah, well we have it on good authority that she leads a
group of dangerous paramilitary ninjas."

Female voice: "Alright, so she does lead a small army of highly
trained Japanese schoolgirls who all worship some strange, unobtainable
standard of aesthetic perfection only achieved through hand-to-hand
combat. But officially... they're dancers. Just dancers. Not a
terrorist cell."

Male voice: "But she-"

Female voice: "Yes, she did in fact knock out a kangaroo. But even
PETA agrees the marsupial had it coming. She is definitely NOT a
terrorist."

Male Voice: "Are you sure about that? Our dogs are STILL afraid to go
near whatever she has in her bag."

[The feet stop moving, as they stop directly in front of a holding
cell.]

Male Voice: "Anyway, here she is."

[The camera swings over to the inside of the cell, where we see Miyuki
Ozaki seated cross-legged on the floor. She stares up with a grim,
almost feral-look on her face...made disturbingly adorable by the two
messy pigtails she has braided her hair into.]

Miyuki: Oh...it's you.

[A frown.]

Miyuki: The Geisha.

[The camera then cuts back to "The Geisha." The fedora crowned Penny
Zadian, dressed in her well tailored business jacket and skirt.]

PZ[rubbing her temples]: Win several judo state championships as you
finish up your doctorate, and this is the kind of errand they send you
on..

[Miyuki stifles a laugh.]

Miyuki: They have graduate course for fetching Amy Marshall the coffee?

[Penelope narrows her eyes.]

PZ: No. Sports Management.

[Miyuki responds with a cuter way to narrow one's eyes.]

PZ: With a focus on combat sports.

[The UWF staffer narrows her eyes that much more.]

PZ: In both theory and practice.

[Miyuki doesn't seem to be impressed, dismissively waving her hand at
Penny.]

Miyuki: Sure, sure...can defend coffee from thieves backstage. So what
you want, Hat Girl?

PZ: I'm taking you out of here and up to L.A. in time for your
match... So that I can make a even more important meeting with some
potential big-wig Hollywood sponsors. Those movie people have a lot of
money to spend, so no weird stuff.

[Penny tosses a Chococat plush backpack at Miyuki.]

PZ: No silly business.

[Miyuki opens her backpack as Penny continues to lecture her.]

PZ: No time to lose. We're driving straight up to the Staples Center
and the last thing I want to do is spend more time on the road than
necessary. Clear?

Miyuki[Still digging through the bag]: Yes, Miyuki-chan
understand...you in big hurry. But first, we need to see Becky
Carlisle-Skullhead-san.

[A confused look from Penny.]

PZ: Huh... Why her?

Miyuki: Voodoo curse not working correctly.

[Miyuki holds up a stitch-work, pin cushioned voodoo doll that sure
enough...resembles a certain TNT recap writer.]

Miyuki: Signs of mental slowness from Scottie, as expected...but hair
has not fallen out. This a big problem!

[She stares at the doll with a frown.]

Miyuki: Maybe needed more than lock of her hair and three drops of
blood?

[Penny seems slightly disturbed, but shakes it off.]

PZ: Really, I'd think any loss of hair would be an improvement for
Saratoga's current look...but that's beside the point. I said no weird
stuff!

[She begins to push Miyuki out the door.]

PZ: Now, let's go!

Miyuki: WAIT!

PZ: What?

Miyuki: Is car convertible?

PZ: Yeah...

[The Japanese beauty digs through her bag once more and pulls out a
pair of oversized, pink star-shaped sunglasses, which she puts on.]

Miyuki: Let's rock.

[And with that, she slings her backpack over one shoulder and strolls
out the cell, past Penny, who shakes her head as we fade out.]
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