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Viewing Single Post From: The Terribly Titled Reaction-locke of Pokemon Reborn
DerogatoryTrainer
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Greatest in the Galaxy
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There was a writer's strike

Because reasons

Mostly lazy reasons.


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Ah Youtube comments...

You'll never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy.




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I'm a weird mixture of grateful and mad at Cain right now

On one hand he got rid of the orphans for me

On the other he also got Shelly captured by terrorists

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I guess I'll thank him as I pound him into oblivion

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You're not Cain.

Why are you even standing here?

Also Hi.

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That's exactly how I see it too

Shelly and "others"

Maybe Heather.

Her muteness is a huge improvement to her character

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Why?

I can just hop over that small hole in the ground

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Uhhhh...

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Did she tell me about that at some point?

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Blah blah Gimme my Pokemon already!

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Ahhh I was so carefree and happy back then...

Full of hope and wonder...

All gone now.

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Jesus...that's a loooot of stuff to do...

Those kids will be dead by the time I'm done.

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That's a terrible idea Victoria.

Why would we go with him?

We just tell him to give me the key to fight his sister and he gets the HM from Kiki

You know...The "split up and look for clues" method

Also what's this "we" thing about?

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No choice in the matter as usual

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The voices are all me

Swearing profusely

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There he is!

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Time for a beating Fishnets!

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Even better I saw it on Shade's HDTV

Such high quality dumbassery I have never seen mate.

Congrats.

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Ha.

Ha.

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Really?

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And why hasn't anybody done anything about this yet?

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I really really doubt that

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Well okay then

Muk is able to swim apparently

So just give me the key to the Wasteland and we'll meet back here yeah?

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Wait...

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GET BACK HERE YOU PURPLE POOF!

I HAVEN'T BEATEN THE SHIT OUT OF YOU YET!

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I will BREAK him.

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Amaria?

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One second love...

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Good no murderous redheads around

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HI AMARIA NICE TO SEE YOU NOT NEAR ANY HIGH PLACES HAHA

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Oh? Do tell?

I'm also curious how you've managed to trace it to one specific place but we'll discuss that later

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Really?

No Really?

Nobody thought the ominously named factory might have been behind it?

NOBODY?

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Sure I don't have anything important to do or save right now

Let's go.

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Later at the old innocently named BlackSteam Factory










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Ahhhh staring off into the dark brown lake made of poison is just so romaaaaantic~

And if you look hard enough you can see a purple idiot drowning on the horizon

Because a blob made of poison isn't a stable raft

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Bust down the door?

Simple yet effective. I like it.

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Ah good thinking this place might have guards

We should use stealth and climb up the wall

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Wait wha-

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FUCKING MOTHER FUCKER

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...

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I...You...What...How...

I have so many questions...

Let...let's just go...

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Ennnngh...

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Ennnnnnnnnnngh...

This is like stupidly dangerous

I slip on steps often enough but one's made of fucking ICE!?!

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Also why didn't she do this to save that Oshawott back in Season 1?

Oh well no point crying over stupid ugly traitorous Oshawotts anyway.

Also is that just like an barrel of oil knocked over on the roof?


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Ah.

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*siiiiiiiigh*

It'd be a nice change if it wasn't ALWAYS these dumbasses

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Yeah yeah let's just get this over with...

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Heheh You ain't half bad Amaria

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Whoa ho ho hold the fucking phone

That ain't right

I mean a Pokemon stronger than Sickle?

And by such a huge margin?

THERE IS NO GOD IN REBORN

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Why did you even bring me here?

You could do this single handed

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I mean I'm amazing and all but there's a 40 level gap between us

All of Team Meteor is weaker than me right now

WHY AM I HERE???

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I somehow doubt that.

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Fuck.

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Okay you take the 5 on the right

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And then take the 5 on the left okay?

It'll be much quicker that way

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Nnnnnnghhh saying that means you're going to do something that endanger's my health sooooo

Nah.

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Oh jesus

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Look it's nothing against you personally I just don't trust anybody ever

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Yyyyep...kept me safe and comfortable...and...alone...

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Boo hoo hoo sadness.

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Oh god not another stairs Amaria...

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But I'm tiiiiiired...

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Gah fuck it here I gooooo~

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Hi there. How's it going.

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You know I could get Mako to set them on fire if you needed the help right?

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What was I thinking?

Of course I don't get to use fucking non-HM moves outside of battle

That'd be too easy.

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Oh boy and now I'm blocked by easily flammable grunts that refuse to battle me

And it's a dead end leading to the only Meteor who could probably beat me

MOTHER FUCKI-

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AH AND IT'S YOU!

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Have...we met before?

I mean of course yes...how could I forget the lovely...uh...

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Wait before you "correct me" I have a question!

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Why were you hiding in this room?

I mean you guys obviously planned this out but why was leading me to this storage closet the plan?

I mean for fuck's sake man you're supposed to be evil and calculating

Don't hide in closets just to jump out and shout "BOO!"

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Wait no I seriously wanted an answer

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Yyyyyyep

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SUUUUUUUCCKKKKK MMMMMYYYYYYYYY

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DIIIIIIIIICCCKKKKK


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And so ends the tale of the Derogatory Trainer...















































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Uggggghhhh....all of my everything hurts...

Was...I dead?

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Unfortunately not...

I'm just in prison...

Again...

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Never been in a PokePrison though...

...Hmmm that's a catchy name...

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Oh no the poor thing...

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I know!

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FEEL BETTER!

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AAAAGHHHH! I WAS TRYING TO HELP!

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WHAT? ARE YOU TALKING TO ME?

I MEAN YOUR MOUSTACHE THING BLOCKS YOUR MOUTH SO I CAN'T TELL

...

WHY DO YOU HAVE A MOUSTACHE SICKLE?

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WHAT? I CAN'T READ WHAT YOU'RE SAYING!

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Hang on it's coming back

Good thing blowing out your eardrums is super easy to fix.

Now what the fuck are you saying?

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Oh heavens looks like I'm never going to escape with this eagle eyed guard watching me

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I have been forsaken by destiny and must now remain here for the rest of my days

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*plays amazing harmonica solo*

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Uh-huh...I'm afraid someone as dull witted as me will never figure it out mighty jailer

But it's not like you'd slip up and tell me how to break the bars

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You'd be right there.

If y'know we DIDN'T live in a world where a good chunk of the wildlife have god damn super powers

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You're absolutely right I mean It's not like I have a super fighting monkey who is also on fire right?

OH WAIT! I totally do.

Mako? Mind helping me out?

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You lot are the most unhelpful Pokemon I ever trained

Also you don't wear clothes.

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Better make use of all these highly destructive creatures seeing as my own are jerks

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Awww the poor abomination...

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I don't know what I can use you for to be honest

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I did not give my consent for this

I feel violated...

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But on the plus side I have super powers

Yay?

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Awwww...glad to see the horrible abuse and neglect hasn't dampened your spirits little buddy

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Wait no this joke happened way to much on the fucking sho-

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It's sooo laaaaammmmeeeeeezzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz




















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I'M NOT GOING BACK TO HELL!!!

I...uh...meant...

Fuck.

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Alright you fucking piece of pink shit I'm skipping this puzzle

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Right I deafened myself again and played Jigglypuff's song so the guard would fall asleep

I moved the Loudred further away so the guard wouldn't wake up when I woke Abra

I then used Abra's teleporting ability to warp all you see above you and hey presto instant escape

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That was a fun puzzle

Just one small problem...

Why could Abra not teleport itself or me out?

And why could it only teleport the Pokemon into other cages?

I guess we'll never know...mainly because these pokemon are off to the glue factory now.

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I'll see you later Meteor Grunt

You'll probably be the only survivor of this place after Amaria is done with it

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Although she seems like an actually nice person so your friends might get lucky

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Farewell trapped Pokemon

If only I could free you from your captors

I mean I totally could but I don't think my character will ever reach the "Becomes a true Hero" arc in this story

So...I'm going to check out that basement that's just begging to be searched

Byeeee~

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It's quite dark but I can't be arsed to get up and turn off the lights for effect.

This is the lazy episode ladies and gents.

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I keep running into these fucking doors...

I'm starting to get creeped out by them...

And this one is super weird being in a modern building and everything...

Oh well time to beat up some goons.

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WELL THEN I'M JUST GONNA LEAVE SO!

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Chin up Sean...don't let him see you cry...

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A special little butterfly are you?

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Also are those your Pokeballs on the wings?

Just when I think you people can't get any more ridiculous...

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Yeah that's totally what will happen

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Okay what the fuck is he wearing?

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No I haven't.

Apparently you guys wear black Snuggies as uniforms?

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Oh it's much stupider.

Is he seriously wearing a...a...I don't even know what the hell he's wearing.

And it's being used to store his Pokeballs too

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You guys do know that they're called Pocket Monsters for a reason yeah?

I mean I wear mine on a belt and it's super easy to get them

I'd fire whoever designs your uniforms mate.

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Safe to say I beat him quite easily.


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Ahh so I'm back where Amaria and I split up

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I don't show me picking up items much but just assume I got most of the obvious ones yeah?

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Well thanks for telling me

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Not often people offer to be shot in the face

It's a nice change.

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It's a condition I have

PokeProtagonistitis

god that was lame

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TAKE THAT BACK YOU MONSTER!

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Nah that's okay man I'm just gonna leave now okay?

Don't want to fight all of you without Amaria to be honest

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Well thanks for ratting me out zEl

You are so off my Christmas card list

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Uh yeah okay...

Listen you mind not standing right behind me?

I get the feeling you're about to stab me.

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As opposed to what?

It's always been a fucking puddle

And they don't make good boats either CAIN!

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Sorry what?

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...

Mother...

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What?

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FUCKING HELL

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Am I dead?

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I guess your Garchomp's been put ON ICE.

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Hey Ponytail maybe you should CHILL out!

HAHAHAHA

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Jesus that was close...I almost died

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I'm fine Amaria

I think I might love you but we'll come to that later

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Because they're assholes?

I mean I get why you're surprised being the Water Gym Leader and all

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Cheshire don't interrupt his evil monologue.

It's very rude.

And it's also my job.

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Whoa Amaria calm down

Don't want to make him cry

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Pssst Amaria...

What is their motivation?

I don't think they've told us yet.

They just shout about kicking everyone out and then they spill oil everywhere

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Well...that was...something...

Ponytail likes Amaria's fashion sense apparently

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Who?

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No seriously who?

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Fuck.

That was actually a really cool line.

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Right-o babe!

I'll "de-activate" it alright

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And who's going to make me?

You and your shitty Eveeloutions?

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It's just too easy sometimes...

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Oh yeah I have to fight that thing


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Oh dear god that's disgusting.

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I'll take your word for it all but at the first sign of trouble get out of there

You're so close to being a giant robot I can almost taste it


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Oh well that wasn't so bad

Al's pretty decent at fighting

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Wait what?

MUDDY WATER?!?

ALPHONSE!

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Uhhh...holy shit.

Well Al I guess you were right about being able to handle it

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I shouldn't have doubted you

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But he's a water type know so I won't chance anything so come on back

INSIDE ALPHONSE'S POKEBALL
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Rock it Jazz!

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Calm down it's really shit at fighting so you'll be fine

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See? It's fiiiiine.

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It's an annoying asshole but it's fiiiine.

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Nice we're almost done with this loser

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I think we all know what happens next

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Bitches get Sickled

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No argument from me

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So Ponytail's name is Solaris?

That means of the sun in Latin right?

Hah gaaaaaaaay.

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That's how most people look next to me Sunshine

Don't be to hard on...her/him/it

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Wanna bet on that?

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Also holy fuck is Amaria fighting that Tyranitar with her bare hands?

She know's her Lapras is right there right?

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Miiiiight be a good time to move Amaria...

This guy likes breaking the Poke-rules far to much for my liki-

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Heh I love how after being punched by a demon lizard made of stone Amaria just sounds like she cut her finger

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Siiiiiiighhhh....

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Not if I have anything to say about that...

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I'm just going to stop trying.

I've given up on ever stopping them leaving.

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And good job to you Amaria.

You've made me like you.

A amazing feat in this game.

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He also said he didn't expect to see me again

After doing nothing that would guarantee that happening

Unless he though Simon and Tara could actually beat me

So fuck him.

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What are the odds they messed that thing up too?

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Are you okay?

I genuinely do care.

Want me to take you to a Human Center?

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Ah don't worry I'm sure Cain can handle i-Blagh

Sorry threw up in my mouth a little

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...

You're...just giving me your boat?

I...uh...

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I honestly don't deserve it Amaria

If anything I owe you my life

Oh god I think I'm developing emotions other than rage

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Hmmmm....

You mention her a lot...

Too much for a platonic relationship

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Oooooh she's a lesbian

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Can't say I'm not disappointed but I like her enough for it not to matter.

Kind of annoyed that the game makes all the good shipping material gay or robotic...

But whatever it's early days yet


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I'll do that.

I mean the plot will force me that way but I'd like to feel that it was my choice

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Make sure you stay away from cliffs and redheads okay?


















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Well I guess that's as good a place to end as any

Found a character I actually like besides Florinia which is nice

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Shame I won't see her for ages now

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And next episode I'll have to deal with Cain and Victoria's idiocy no doubt

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Oh well my brain aneurysm isn't going to hemorrhage itself now it it?

See you guys next time


ON THE ADVENTURES OF....THIS!
FUCK

I FORGOT THE REPLIES AGAIN

Replies


Edited by DerogatoryTrainer, Nov 2 2015, 08:24 PM.
A Most Excellent Journey Of Pain And Misery

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Another world, another Terribly Titled series : Pokemon Rejuvenation

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The Terribly Titled Reaction-locke of Pokemon Reborn · Completed Screenshot and Written Log Runs