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Top 5 Rebuttals; Fill this out please
Topic Started: Aug 25 2007, 08:35 PM (174 Views)
The Real Speed
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Spam God..The Shinigami of SCW, and better then you
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Hey everyone,

I'm sure we've all be "annoyed" during dinner times when a telemarketer calls our places. Or for some are just annoyed period because they hate telemarketers. So I'm looking for everyone to compile a quick list for me. Just 5 of your most used rebuttlals when purchasing a product or talking to a sales agent.

So just reply with your top 5 for me.

Thanks,

That guy

PS- I asked the mods to make sure my topic doesn't get spammed, so don't spam it or the post will be deleted anyways. Thanks.
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Jason Casey
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(these are made up just for the fun of it. chances are, they are highly terrible)

-"I like your idea, but would you possibly sell family time because right now you're using mine."

-simply try to pitch them a product, acting like you are the telemarketer

-tell them you have tourettes and constantly swear at them in a demeaning manor.

-pretend you're an answering machine, and if they leave a message, tell them to fuck off

-just go fucking nuts on them.
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The Real Speed
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Spam God..The Shinigami of SCW, and better then you
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I don't want made up ones, I want the ones that you use on calls. I'm compiling a list of the most common rebuttals so I can create my rebuttals to the rebuttal.

I'm that asshole who calls you to close you on a sale.

So try again
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James Exeter
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this is an ocelot
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Why is it that I find it hilarious that speed is a telemarketer? =P

Anyways, I usually just hang up on them so... yeah.
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The Real Speed
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Spam God..The Shinigami of SCW, and better then you
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telecommunications specialist*

I'm above the low level telemarketer.. I can close lol

and yeah, it's good money James. Get in the biz
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St. Claire
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Funniest ones I've ever heard are from my best mates dad whilst he is drunk. It's hilarious when he tries to ask telemarketers out on dates, and then they get tired of him first and hang up.
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The Real Speed
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Spam God..The Shinigami of SCW, and better then you
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EDIT!


Dont' tell me your funny ones, I don't need telemarketer jokes. I have a huge list of those and pranks that are far superior to anything you guys can come up with.

I want standard rebuttals.. if I call you up, try to sell you something. What would you say?

Chad would say "fuck off" and then rape me verbally with insults while I try to sell to him.

Now that's awesome.. cause I just cut him off from talking about what he would do. Anyways here's an example of what im looking for (but better/more unorthodox)

"I have to talk to my husband/wife about this"

"i dont have the finances"

"Can i have your 1-800 # to call you back on?" (thats a fuck off question)

Where I can make up my own rebuttals or comebacks to those. I need to compile a list by next week, so help me out and stop being stupid.
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James Exeter
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this is an ocelot
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Yeah, the "I need to confer with someone else and they aren't here right now."

Or just tell them you're under 18 and aren't the person of the household who is capable of making decisions on purchases like this.

And I almost did get into that business this summer, but meh, didn't get hired. Oh well.
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Greg Cherry
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Mine is "No thanks" followed by an abrupt hang up of the phone.
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Jay Gold
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YES! YES! YES! YES! :)
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I've used this one...frequently.


"What was that again? I'm sorry, you're breaking up...click."

What? :CTface: They sometimes call back, but meh... <_<
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Cid
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Silenced Hero
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Jay sucks.

I say that I'm in the middle of throwing up and then hang up.
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Lenne Perez
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SCW Women's Knockout Champion <3
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I just yell random words and then hang up.

Except this one place calls every day, regardless of me yelling at them.
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The Real Speed
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Ok different scenario..

what you guys are describing would be cold calling. I'm to good for cold calling, it's for the people who can't close shit and need to read a script. I don't have a script.

Ok so you own a cellphone from the company, I work for that company. You are on a pay as you go plan, and my job is to make you see the benefits of the 1 year plans, 2 year, 3 year.. that stuff.

Seems pretty easy on paper, and it will most likely be. But in this scenario you most likely do not hang up cause it's to do with your cellphone and a better deal (as I would most likely lead off with the fact that I can help you save money on your monthly phone bills)

:)

Top 5 rebuttlals to someone pushing a cellphone contract onto you?
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Jason Casey
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"gee, i guess i should buy your plan because it's fuckfaces like you who keep calling me and wasting my money." click.
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The Real Speed
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Spam God..The Shinigami of SCW, and better then you
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Ok you people are to un-educated to understand this concept on what I'm trying to write out. THanks for trying to help, but you all failed.

Thanks for trying, good luck in life.
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Jason Casey
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well you didn't say the same thing as the first part, so i assumed you switched it up for the second time.

good luck in life on grammar.
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The Real Speed
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Spam God..The Shinigami of SCW, and better then you
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Grammar is worthless, I do min writing all day. In fact, I wrote more rping then anything else.

I know how to talk thankfully, it's a skill that I find greater then being a perfect writer.
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St. Claire
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The Real Speed,Aug 26 2007
02:00 AM
Grammar is worthless, I do min writing all day. In fact, I wrote more rping then anything else.

I know how to talk thankfully, it's a skill that I find greater then being a perfect writer.

In your line of work it is. Telemarketers still suck though. If you were really good at closing the sale, you wouldn't be a telemarketer. In fact, you'd be able to sell telemarketers shit they don't need when they call YOU.
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Sarah Punche
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SCW Talent Analyst & Davis' Biggest Obsession
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Michael Buffer:

Ladies and gentleman.....are you ready?

I said....are.....you.....readyyyyyy?

Then for the thousands in attendance and the millions around the world...let's get ready to rumbllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllle!!!!!!

:o :o :o
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Cid
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Silenced Hero
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.. Would someone just

lock Jay already
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Shorty Jr.
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God of Wrestling
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Most of the time the telemarketers call for my mom or dad. I tell them she / he is not available (asleep/work/gone out) and call at 10:00 PM (they never do) or 8:00 AM (no one picks up the phone around that time). I got Caller ID so most of the time I just don't pick up.

:CTface: I know I'm late, Speed, just doing what I thought you wanted as far as common rebuttals.
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Damian Angel
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The Devil Himself and Member of the Nation of Moderation
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Me: "I'm sorry... can I put you on hold for a couple minutes?"

*put them on hold*

*come back 15 minutes later*

They're never still there.
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John Blade
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"The Master Of Disaster"
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The Real Speed,Aug 26 2007
07:27 AM
Ok you people are to un-educated to understand this concept on what I'm trying to write out. THanks for trying to help, but you all failed.

Thanks for trying, good luck in life.

Normally I'd listen to see if the offer suits me. The things that could be used to say no are:

- I'm happy with my plan at the moment
- I don't pay for my contract and my mom/dad/whoever isn't around right now
- I'm not happy with the service I'm currently getting and I don't want to re-new my contract
- The phone I got with my contract doesn't work properly/the signal doesn't work properly, so I can hardly use my phone as it is
- I don't use my phone enough to really renew a contract, I'd be better off with pay as you go.

Can't think of much else. Sorry.
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Dresser Boys
Karma's Warrior
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I only need to do one thing. Give the phone to M V and let him talk. Works Great
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The Real Speed
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Thanks John Blade, you at least understood what I was asking.

A rebuttal is not hanging up the phone, if I wanted that answer I'd go down to another office.
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