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Gable Winchester & Stacy Kissinger vs. Tooty Fruit
Topic Started: Apr 2 2011, 08:41 AM (158 Views)
Kassie Khane
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Admin and Second in Command of the Nation of Moderation
[ *  *  * ]
SCW Presents: Breakdown: April 13, 20]

Gable Winchester & Stacy Kissinger vs. Tooty Fruity & Peach Fuzz


1 RP Limit; 2 RP Limit PER TEAM for the Tag match
Deadline: Noon EST Tuesday, April 12, 2011

~~Good Lucky Everyone!~~

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The_F_Ups
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[ *  *  * ]
[align=center]"The Rise of Tooty Fruity"
PART ONE[/align]

The scene opens and it's dark and rainy, kind of like how a generic movie opens up, yeah it's not original and honestly I don't give a fuck what you think. Anyway, where were we....oh yeah...it was a dark and rainy night in the town of Fort Collins, Colorado, the birth place of Tooty Fruity, yeah I've never heard of this place either, but honestly who gives a fuck about Colorado anyways. Good ole' Chase, better known as Tooty, is with his father driving down the street after coming from the movie theaters after seeing a movie that I couldn't tell you what it was, it must of been a good movie cause it seems Chase is a bit happy, smiling from ear to ear. Chase's dad, I believe his name was Mark, looked a bit pleased also, though I think he loved to hang out with his kid, how touching huh? Must be a tear to your eye, well I hope it does, cause that was suppose to be a touching moment, so start crying damn it. May I add that this was when Chase was a kid, so this is a flashback, forgot to mention, sorry.

Chase Adams: "Thank you for tonight daddy."

Mark Adams: "You're welcome, son. I thought it was some good father and son time. Which we don't get enough of those due to daddy being so busy."

How touching....I'm about to be sick to my stomach.

Chase Adams: "Are we going to be able to do this a lot?"

Mark Adams: "I hope so, son, I hope so."

All touching moments to end. We flash forward to the next day where a police officer comes knocking on the door. Why? I don't know, I'm not God. Jesus... Chase's mother answers the door as Chase sits on the top of the steps listening to the conversation.

Police Officer: "Are you Janet Adams, the wife of Mark Adams?"

Janet Adams: "Yes I am. Why? Is there something wrong?"

Police Officer: "I'm sorry to say that your husband has been killed. We found his body in his car."

Janet Adams: "What.....no...."

Police Officer: "I'm sorry Miss Adams."

Janet Adams: "Tell me this is a joke he's playing on me. TELL ME!"

Police Officer: "I'm sorry this no joke. He's dead."

Janet Adams: "No. God. NO!"

I'm speechless. For the first time in my life of narration, I'm speechless. I don't know what to say. Chase and his father, Mark was just having a great night of fun, and now he's dead. I feel bad foor little, Chase. Chase is still sitting at the top of his steps tears coming down his face, right here I'd call him a pussy but at this situation I'm gonna let it pass. The Police Officer takes a look at the top of the stairs and sees Chase sitting there, as does his mother Janet, which I may say has a nice piece of ass. What? Calm down, jesus, I was just trying to bring some laughter to this sad moment. Janet looks at Chase with crying eyes, Chase comes running down the stairs and hugs his mother. It kind of seems the Police Officer may shed some tears. Damn this is getting really emotional. More crying goes on and a lot of kissing on the head and such as the scene fades and we cut to present day.

Chase Adams: "So that's pretty much what happened. I never really knew how my father died. All I knew that they found his body in his car. He could of got in a fatal car crash, or someone shot him..."

We now find ourselves in an office type room, my guess it's an office at his high school, and the person he's talking to is his guidance counselor, who I made looks mad fine, blonde hair, nice curve, beautiful smile.....oh man, a kind of woman I'd jerk too. If I were Chase I'd hit on that hot piece of ass, but of course he wouldn't, cause he's a pussy and fucking virgin. Jesus..

Chase Adams: "I miss him a lot. All I got now is a crack addicted mother who is barely sane enough to talk to me. It kind of sucks, Ms. Campbell."

Ms. Campbell: "That's horrible, Chase. I really feel for you right now, and hope the best for you. You got friends right?"

Chase Adams: "Yeah of course. I got a friend, or two."

Yeah, his hands. What? I know you were going to say the same. Don't call me evil.

Ms. Campbell: "OK. Good. I'd hate to see you be lonely with nobody to talk to him."

I feel the same about you too, baby.... Oh sorry. I kind of cut in on that. Carry on.

Chase Adams: "I'll be all right, Ms. Campbell. I've got my good friends, Scott, Barry, and Stevie to talk too."

Ms. Campbell: "Good. Just remember. I'm always here for you whenever you need to talk."

Chase Adams: "Thank you, Ms. Campbell. I'll see you next Wednesday."

Ms. Campbell: "All right, Chase, I'll see you then."

Chase sits up from his seat and just walks away without giving the kind lady a hug, fucking douche. I'd hug Ms. Campbell, cop a feel, and so many other things I shouldn't list. Anyway, Chase leaves the room and catches up with his friend, Stevie, who is in a good damn wheelchair. Jesus. Kid is making friends from the short bus, no wonder he's a virgin...

Stevie: "How did the talk go?"

Chase Adams: "It went well, I guess. Just a generic talk. Speaking about my father and such."

Stevie: "Damn, she went that far today?"

Chase Adams: "It's all right. I guess it was good to get out of the way, you know?"

Stevie: "Yeah, that's true, man."

Damn geek talk, nothing interesting ever goes on, sometimes I wish there was a fast forward button in life, would make things a lot better. Things may get better though, cause a girl is walking down the hallway and let me tell you how good she looks, black hair, nice curves, beautiful smile......what? I can't help myself, I'm quite obsessed with hot chicks. Shouldn't you be too.

Stevie: "Hey man, look it's Cassandra walking down the hall."

And, this is where he goes into his own little world fantasizing what he wants to happen, but it's not really happening. Yeah you know what I'm talking, you see it in every geeky high school movie.

Chase Adams: "Fuck this, Stevie, I'm going to talk to her."

Chase runs over to Cassandra and spits his motherfucking game. Oh wait this is a fantasy. Fuck. Damn virgin.

Chase Adams: "Cassandra."

Cassandra: "Yes, Chase?"

Chase Adams: "I've been wanting to say this to you for a long, long time, but I.....love you. I've loved you ever since the second grade. I've always wanted to fuck you so bad it's not even funny. I..."

Cassandra: "I get it, Chase. You're obsessed with me. You want me so bad, and to be honest, I always loved you too, I was just to scared to tell you."

Chase Adams: "Really?"

Cassandra: "Yes....I'm serious."

Chase Adams: "Well, damn, you wanna make out and make up for all the times we could of done it?"

Cassandra: "Sure."

Yeah, like that would really happen in real life. Shit isn't that easy. As that "make out" session is going on we go back into the real world, and Chase is just staring at Cassandra who is still walking down the hall.

Cassandra: "Stop looking at my tits, Chase. Jesus. Fucking perv."

Chase Adams: "Huh? What are you talking about."

Oh shit, douche bag got caught. He's really fucking bright. And, here comes Cassandra's boyfriend, Frankie, and he looks really pissed.

Frankie: "Hey dickweed, stop staring at my girlfriend."

Frankie pushes Chase up against his locker and a tear starts to fall down his face. What a damn pussy, Jesus...

Chase Adams: "I wasn't staring at your girlfriend."

Frankie: "She saw you dickweed."

Chase Adams: "Well, I wasn't looking at her. I was looking out that window over there."

Frankie: "Yeah, sure you were dickweed."

Chase Adams: "My name is Chase, not dickweed, you fucking moron."

Oh my God.....did he just? No. He couldn't have, there is no way. Did he just grow some balls and step up for himself? I'm about to shed a tear in happiness.

Frankie: "What did you just say?"

Chase Adams: "You heard me, ass clown."

He did it again! I can't believe my eyes. He makes me proud. Frankie doesn't look to pleased though, not pleased enough he punches Chase right in the face and pretty much knocks Chase the fuck out. Chase backs into the locker again and tears begin to fall from his face. God damn it. I thought this kid was manning up but not he's crying. I had hope, man. I guess he'll always be a damn pussy. Fucking Jesus.

Cassandra: "Frankie! Calm down, there is no need for that."

Frankie: "Fuck him, Cassandra. He deserved it. Forget about it and lets go."

Cassandra is actually feeling bad for this sorry soul. She checks on what is turning into a black eye. Jesus, Frankie punched him pretty damn hard.

Frankie: "Stop caring for the kid and lets go, Cassandra."

Chase Adams: "Stop bossing her around you jerk."

Frankie: "... What was that?"

He's doing it again!

Chase Adams: "She is not your puppet. She is your girlfriend. You care for her."

Frankie: "You're hilarious, dude. You just want to get your ass kicked don't you?"

Frankie throws another punch at Chase, but Chase moves out of the way and Frankie's punch hits the locker. Chase backs up a few steps and throws a punch at Frankie but it doesn't phase him one bit. Fucking weakling. Frankie laughs and Chase just stares at him and tries to throw another punch at Frankie but Chase grabs his hand and then punches him in the stomach. Chase falls to his knees and Frankie goes ahead and kicks him in the stomach. This is getting brutal. I'm kind of feeling bad for this kid.

Cassandra: "Frankie! Fucking stop, Jesus, you're going to kill him."

Frankie: "Stop caring for this kid. He's worthless. No one likes him."

Frankie grabs Cassandra's arm and walks away. As Cassandra is being pulled away, Cassandra is looking back at the hurt, Chase, feeling bad for him. Shit was brutal. If I were Chase I'd kick that kids ass, but he can't, cause he's a fucking pussy. Kid isn't ever going to get anywhere in life. Fucking pathetic.

Stevie: "You alright, man?"

Chase Adams: "Yeah....I think so."

Stevie: "What was up with that. You never really stick up for yourself."

Chase Adams: "I'm getting sick of Frankie, always pushing me around. I guess I snapped."

Stevie: "Um, yeah.....you got your ass kicked for it though."

Chase Adams: "I'll get my payback for it don't worry."

Chase gets up and walks off, looking a bit pissed. He ditches school. Guess you could say he's going to get karate lessons by Mr. Miyagi, cause that's the only way this pussy is going to be able to fight this kid, or unless he turns into some kind of superhero and that shit isn't going to happen. So, this kid is going to get his ass raped for the rest of life. Sigh.

[align=center]* * *[/align]

Well, well, well, look at what some of you thought we couldn't do. And, that is get a victory. We stomped all over that Disco Ninja and Decoy, and Peach Fuzz and I made them our bitches. We dominated, and ended it with the best finisher in the business today. THE DOUBLE CHOKESLAM OF DOOM! I know it was the best thing you have ever seen in your life, and wish you were us. But, don't fret. cause Peach Fuzz and I are going to do it again this week after we mop the floor with a chick and some negro. All the Fuck Uppers around the world and in the building will be chanting us on again as we show everyone that we are the greatest tag team of all time.

Stacy Kissasser and Gable Chesthair is going to shake in their little boots when they lay there eyes on us. They will beg us not to lay the smackdown on them. And, quite frankly, I don't care if your man, woman, my mother, grandmother, the pope, Brack Obama, the bum down the street, or God himself, I will beat the ever loving shit out of you until you can not move anymore. So, Stacy and Gable better be worried from what Peach and I are going to bring come Breakdown. We are not going to bring a sleeping bag and pitch a tent. We are not looking to make a sex video. We are looking to win this mother freaking match. We will not lose.

I am so ready for this match. So, Kissasser and Chesthair best be ready for the fight of their life. Fuzz and I are bringing everything, and I MEAN EVERYTHING. WE ARE NOT DISAPPOINTING ALL THE FUCK UPPERS THAT CAME TO SAY US FUCK PEOPLE UP.


Peach Fuzz: "Breathe man, you're kind of losing it."

Tooty Fruity: "Why do you always gotta cut into my promos?"

Peach Fuzz: "Cause I can, bitch?"

Tooty Fruity: "You don't see me cutting into your promos."

Peach Fuzz: "Cause your too much of a pussy bitch to do it."

Tooty Fruity: "You think so?"

Peach Fuzz: "Shut up and finish your damn promo."

Breakdown is moving near. I've been preparing hard for this match. I've been lifting my five pound weights. Been doing my jumping jacks. And, I've been punching the meat like no other. I've ran mile after mile after god damn miler, alright maybe it was only down my street, but I still have been running like no other getting trained for this match, and come Breakdown I will be ready to stomp a motherfucking mudhole in your asses.

You have been warned, bitches


Peach Fuzz: "You do know you were calling them Kissasser and Chesthair?"

Tooty Fruity: "That's their name isn't it?"

Peach Fuzz: "I don't know their name, all I know it isn't Kissasser and Chesthair."

Tooty Fruity: "Fuck man, why didn't you tell me?"

Peach Fuzz: "You hate me cutting in your promos, remember?"

Tooty Fruity: "You know you just wanted to make me look like an idiot."

Peach Fuzz: "Yeah, pretty much."

Tooty Fruity: "I hate you..."

Peach Fuzz: "I know you do. Anyway, let's get out of here and go to the strip club."

That's the only action they'll ever get. Sorry had to. The scene fades right here by the way.
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Stacy Kissinger
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Craig's Texas Rose
[ *  *  * ]
OOC: Before the following is read, please read Gable's post first as his character development comes before this. Besides that, good luck to the two of you...you know, the two of you that won't be fucking Stacy up or double penetrating her. ;)
______________________________________________________________________________

Prefix: Everyone wants to be a star. Everyone wants to be rich. Everyone wants to be famous. It’s something that all of us need to admit. And even if say you are a star, you want more. You want more money, more fame, and to be the biggest star in history. You want to have your name engraved on a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame.

But well, not everyone can get to this point. All we can do is try. For most along the way, they fall victim to the possibility of being a mega-star. They don’t keep themselves down to Earth. Instead they push their way to the top, not caring who they step on to get there. They want power. That’s all they think about. They eat it, drink it, sleep it, breathe it. And when they don’t get there, where do they end up? Despair…disappointment…and in the rare case, suicidal.

Of course on the bright side there are those who aren’t looking for power. They just strive to do the best they can. And sometimes, it pays off for them. Just look around the music industry, the sporting world, and actors and actresses on the big screen. They earned their places. They knew their natural talents and worked their way to where they all are today. From the leads and household names to those who only get a few lines to those who have pieced together a masterpiece behind the scenes. Those who have been willing to do the work have become the stars that will always be remembered…

As far as Stacy Kissinger is concerned, she has been one of those hard workers. She’s worked through the good times and the bad times to get to where she’s at, even wavering from her path for a while, trying to take the short cut. But in the end she chose not to continue on that “cheap” path. She has shown that she’s going to earn everything she gets. Every dollar, every fan, every championship, even every second she gets with the man she’s loving more and more with each passing day……


[align=center]
Supreme Championship Wrestling Presents…

A Kiss-chester Production…

“THE ROAD AHEAD”
[/align]

Chapter 5: Everyone Wants To Be Famous

The sun set hours ago and darkness has long since overcome Sacramento, California. As it nears 11 o’clock, Gable and Stacy find themselves silently filing into their hotel room for their last night in the city, before they’re due to head down south to Los Angeles. But their upcoming trip doesn’t seem to be on the mind of Stacy as she sits on the edge of the bed, sighing very loudly as she does so. Gable looks to her and can see that despite the night out alongside the Next Level and Jack, it hasn’t helped with her troubled state. Really the last few days have been all the same. Gable steps towards her and speaks in what seems to be a comfortable tone to Stacy. She does at least look into his eyes.

Gable: Well Stace, I was kind of hoping tonight would help your mood, but I understand.

Stacy: Yer prob’ly the only one Gable. Sorry if I sound a lil’ blunt, but as ya know, I STILL have yet to reach my mothah via phone. I have no clue if Jenna went back home yet. I know that my fathah is somewhere on the loose doin’ lord knows what. To be honest Gable, I could reach my breakin’ point at any time. I certainly didn’t need Chad verbally attackin’ me like how he did. I know it comes with the business and he’s always known to go below the belt, but if ya hadn’t been there to hold me back…well…Lohan there woulda gotten her wish, whereva she is these days.

Stacy sighs a second time before she just pulls her black singlet top up and over her head before just randomly tossing it to her right. For Gable, as much as seeing Stacy’s white bra tempts him, he holds back, probably thinking that this is still not a good time for “play time”. Instead he responds, verbally.

Gable: We agreed to stop thinking about Brittany. She’s over and done with. She’s the past. We’re the future Stace…and the future is now! We have a GREAT chance to really be famous after Riding The Lightning when we’re STILL the SCW World Tag Team Champions! As for now, I know that you’re troubled, but that’s what I’m here for. We’re partners Stace, and not just in the ring.

Again Stacy looks her fiancée square in his eyes as Gable sits next to her on the edge of the bed. She gets out a partial smile and Gable, well, he’s happy to see it. Taking the smile as a good sign, he leans in to go for a kiss. Stacy doesn’t stop him and instead welcomes it. Her tense shoulders relax as their lips touch. The pair stays connected until Gable’s fingers touch the large engagement ring on Stacy’s left ring finger. Their kiss ends and Stacy looks down at it, speaking to Gable at the same time.

Stacy: With everythin’ goin’ on lately Gable, I…I have to admit it…I haven’t thought enough ‘bout our future. Yer right. We’re partnahs. Wheneva I feel down, I’ll come to ya more often.

Gable: Sounds good to me Stace. And don’t worry, things will turn out alright. I’m sure Jenna wants to see her family again. If she hasn’t gotten on a plane by now, I’m sure she will soon enough.

Stacy: I hope so. She needs to go home. Not fer my sake, but fer hers and her family’s. Perhaps I should call ‘em…though then again it’s been ovah a year. They might be just gettin’ ovah her…um…well, ya know…

Gable: I know. Kind of a conundrum. It’s probably best to just let Jenna return home, her family opens the door wide in shock, and they have their reunion, the end…

Stacy shakes her head a little bit, trying to keep a stern, serious look on her face as she responds to Gable.

Stacy: One could only hope that that’s what happens. I mean, I really wanna be optimistic ‘bout it Gable, but well, I don’t see it happenin’ exactly that smoothly. I know her family well. And they know me well. And if any of ‘em has heard what my fathah did to her…it could erupt into a family feud. Perhaps it might be best if she HAS stayed in Vegas. Who knows? Maybe that place’ll make her famous. She seemed to be fittin’ in there and she was quite comfortable.

Gable nods as Stacy pulls herself completely on the bed and goes to lie down, that is after unbuckling her belt and downing her jeans before shaking them off of her feet and allowing them to drop off the edge of the bed. Gable turns to see his future laid out before him on the bed. He moves up so he’s completely next to Stacy on the second pillow. She turns to him and lays on her side.

Stacy: And well, I’m as comfortable as I can be right here with my fiancée, who I’ll admit is full of win.

Gable smiles his Winchester smile which does bring a bit more color to Stacy’s cheeks.

Stacy: Anyways, it’s been quite a long night. Sleep is invitin’ right now, but um, don’t go anywhere. I’m sharin’ this sleep with ya tonight Gable. I know I’ve been distant lately. Ya don’t deserve that.

Gable: I understand though Stace. Though I’m obviously happy to be right here.

Stacy: I know ya are. Night mah Gable.

Gable looks like he’s about to respond with his goodnight, but doesn’t get the chance as she gives him an intoxicating kiss that has him moving as close to her as possible. When Stacy decides to release him, Gable rolls out of the bed and goes to turn off the light. It’s but a few moments later that he’s back in bed alongside his tag team partner. Even though we can’t see in the darkness, the two most likely are now closing their eyes, getting ready to drift off to dreamland for the night.

[align=center]* * * * *[/align]

Unbeknownst to both Stacy and Gable, as they sleep, Mr. Kissinger is back on the move. Shockingly he’s just passing the city limits, heading back into Dallas, Texas. The bikini picture of his daughter is still on the dashboard as he soldiers on in the truck he’s driving, all the way until he turns on to the familiar roads of his neighborhood. He drives all the way until he gets home. He pulls into the driveway and gets out of the truck. With each step he heads closer to the front door. Mr. Kissinger is about to knock, but then remembers that he has a copy of the front door key in his truck. He goes back to grab it and returns very quickly. A few seconds later he’s back inside the house that he himself purchased. He turns the light on in the living room to see that Mrs. Kissinger must have somehow escaped the couch. He walks into the kitchen to see that the kitchen is clean. He smiles, knowing that his “wife” is still living here. He steps lightly as he heads upstairs, all the way to the master bedroom. Mr. Kissinger walks in and there his “wife” lays, sound asleep. Mr. Kissinger shakes his head and just turns away from her, tuning her presence out. Carefully he makes his way to Stacy’s room, doing his best to not make any noise. He finds himself quickly back on Stacy’s computer. Before he peruses around on it though, he looks in the drawers by the computer and smirks as he comes upon a few things that he knows he can put to good use…the password to her facebook and the password to Stacy’s Supreme Championship Wrestling twitter account. He whispers to himself so there’s no way Mrs. Kissinger will hear him.

Mr. Kissinger: Shoulda known she’s be on that twittah thing. Perhaps I should take a peak and see what she’s up to. Maybe find out where she’s headin’ fer the next few shows of hers…

Without delay and making sure to type softly on the keyboard, he logs in to Stacy’s twitter account and immediately rolls his eyes at the sweet, innocent display picture that Stacy has for her account. He sighs before again whispering to himself.

Mr. Kissinger: My daughtah should be showin’ off what everyone else can’t have. I’ll fix that.

Knowing where to look, Mr. Kissinger uploads a sexy bikini picture of Stacy and then begins to look at some of the postings of Stacy’s fellow SCW roster members. He just shakes his head and says to himself that it’s a waste of his time as he’s not finding out any information that he wants. So he chooses to go over to Stacy’s facebook account. It’s here that he sees that SCW is currently heading through California. Mr. Kissinger grins and nods his head before exiting out of the internet and logging off Stacy’s computer. Quietly he leaves Stacy’s room and heads down the stairs, with the two passwords in hand. Once he’s outside he’s visually proud of himself as he gets back into his truck and backs down the driveway before leaving the “scene of the crime”. Mrs. Kissinger still is fast asleep upstairs, having no clue that her deranged “husband” was in the same house with her…

[align=center]* * * * *[/align]

Promo: Not What Ya Think

Another day has come. The morning came with Stacy still aside Gable. Even now she’s smiling as she undoubtedly remembers how content she felt waking up alongside her fiancée. So content that she has requested him to be alongside her even now, even though her music lyric notebook is open and she’s trying to come up with words for yet another song for her album that has been slow in the making, but will no doubt be worth the wait to the Stacy Kissinger fans of the world, which is not a low number. Stacy looks up from her notebook and Gable looks impressed as Stacy hums the tune she’s thinking about for a few more seconds before stopping.

Gable: That sounds good Stace. Running it by Scoresby no doubt the next time you see him?

Stacy: Yeah. That’ll have to wait though. Ain’t gonna see him ‘til prob’ly aftah Ridin’ The Lightnin’.

Gable: Oh.

Stacy: Speakin’ of that, I should really get my mind back on track. I wanna be there fer ya 100 percent next Sunday. Don’t wanna be losin’ the tag team titles to eitha team that we’re facin’.

Gable: I’m with you on that one partner.

Both Gable and Stacy stand up and deliver one another a high five. Gable holds Stacy’s hand in the air and the two of them warmly smile before letting one another’s hands go.

Stacy: ‘Course unlike them though, we got some work to do before the pay per view. Don’t know ‘bout you Gable, but I’m gonna take Peach and Tooty seriously. Besides, that’s just me, I take every opponent I face seriously. Yeah, even Katelyn. I don’t see anythin’ as a joke.

Gable: Yeah I know Stace. So, since Jack is probably sleeping late like he always does, want me to go get us breakfast from downstairs?

Stacy: Sure Gable. That’s very sweet of ya.

Gable: I’ll come right back up.

Stacy nods.

Stacy: Sounds good Gable. A lil’ breakfast in bed…

Stacy closes her eyes for a moment, seeming to cherish that thought. When she opens her eyes she sees that Gable is already heading out the door.

Stacy: See ya in a bit. Don’t be too long mah Gable.

Gable: I won’t be.

And with that, he’s gone. No sooner is he gone, Stacy digs into her purse and pulls out her small camcorder. She opens it and places it on top of the television. She hits the record button and goes and sits on the bed that’s right across from it. She places her hands in her lap and goes right ahead with her current thoughts.

Stacy: With the days to Ridin’ The Lightnin’ dwindlin’, I fer one can feel the anticipation buildin’ and buildin’. Now I’ve been dealin’ with stuff away from the ring right and left, and as everyone saw this past Friday Night, dealin’ with Chad’s childish remarks. Now fer a lot of people, it would be a lot to balance. I’ll admit it, it’s been hard on me too. But that’s why I’m glad I have my rock, my tag team partnah, Gable Winchester. He’s been there fer me and I’ve promised that I’ll be there fer him when I’m called upon to be. That’s what makes us powahful World Tag Team Champions. We’re a team. Much like you Peach Fuzz and you Tooty Fruity. Now I know everyone sees ya both as the runnin’ jokes of SCW. But take me seriously when I say that I see ya two much differently. When I look at the two of yas, I see two more competitahs. Sure ya wrestle a bit sloppy, but yer both doin’ the best ya can every time ya hit that ring. There’s no give-up from the two of yas. The two of yas aren’t in this business fer the politics and the games, unlike Chad Evans, Katelyn Buehler and the whole of Infamous. That I commend.

Stacy pauses, but it’s not a long one by any means.

Stacy: What I don’t commend though is the fact that yer growin’ a bit full of yerselves, ‘specially you Tooty. Now I know my fiancée does tend to grandstand and that’s his nature and whatnot, but to be honest, it’s his weakness and he knows it. But you Tooty, you and Peach win one match and already yer thinkin’ that yer gonna show the whole world that yer the greatest tag team of all time? Seriously, it takes a lot of work to get to that point. Trust me, Gable and I know how that long road feels. I know Ravyn believes we got our first tag team title shot against Greg Cherry and Jake Starr outta the blue, but when ya look at thangs, that’s not how it went down. We both showed a lotta moxie. We both showed a lot of heart in our quests fer singles gold. We both showed a lotta passion and well, we both showed to the world that puttin’ us togetha would only make us strongah. Now look at Gable and I. We’re SCW World Tag Team Champions ‘cause we earned the championships…twice. Now of course pretty much everyone’s writin’ Gable and I off fer Ridin’ The Lightnin’, just like they’re all writin’ the two of yas off to have successful careers. In this case, we’re very similah Peach and Tooty.

But here’s where we diffah. Tooty, ya think that Gable and I are gonna be scared in that ring? Ya think we’re gonna be shakin’? Nah. I wouldn’t even shake if Gable and I were facin’ 10 Gunnah Waynes! Nope Tooty, we’re gonna come in to Breakdown in Los Angeles not even thinkin’ ‘bout the pay per view. The two of yas are gonna have our undivided attention. It won’t even mattah if Dark Fantasy or The Gospel wants to make their mark, ‘cause here’s the thang…they won’t. Instead what’ll happen is this. Gable and I are gonna get in that ring and we’re gonna pour our hearts and souls out against you guys ‘til the bittah end. Like always we’re gonna give the crowd in attendance somethin’ to cheer about!


Stacy breathes a few times before continuing.

Stacy: Again at least somethin’ we all want. All four of us are ‘bout the people standin’ up outta their seats and just enjoyin’ the great action. Everyone in Los Angeles is waitin’ to see what our two teams are gonna do next as we head towards Ridin’ The Lightnin’. Everyone. All I can say ‘bout that, from where I stand guys, what’s next will be the Kiss that neitha of ya wanna feel…the same Kiss that will dash not just yer hopes of gainin’ a win ovah the SCW World Tag Team Champions, but also the hopes of Dark Fantasy and The Gospel…the same Kiss that will result in one of Gable’s arms and one of my arms being extended into the air in victory!

Again the lovely Texan finds herself taking a few deep breaths as she just looks into the camcorder lens, looking quite ready to take on the challenges that are lined up in front of both her and Gable in the coming days. Should the two of them get through these challenges, it could be said that both will be more famous than they are now. For Stacy Kissinger though, fame is not even close to the top of her list of cares. She knows that there are so many other things…more important things to be caring about.
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Gable Winchester
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Legend Thriller Extraordinaire
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OOC: Sorry for the late post, but enjoy regardless

The Favour
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The_F_Ups
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OOC: Sorry about the lateness. I am having to run around to find internet. I wrote this a few days ago and it started off kind of slow, where Peach Fuzz has a lot of fighting against Magnum XL, earning his respect and against a super villain. And other stuff goes down. Enjoy because it is fucked up.

So just like everyone else, I am pretty fucking shocked that the two biggest rejects in the wrestling biz today…yes…The Fuck Ups…yes Peach Fuzz and Tooty Fruity…managed to win a match. Yeah, you heard correctly. They won a match. We should all take a moment of silence, because I am pretty sure that will not happen again, because let’s face it…this upcoming match will not be like the previous match up. They are facing the newly crowned SCW Tag Team Champions in Chad Evans and Katelyn Buehler…oh wait, I am sorry. They already lost. Let me try that again. This week on Breakdown, the final show before Riding the Lightning, the Fuck Ups are facing the newly crowned SCW Tag Team Champions in Stacy Kissinger and Gable Winchester. So yeah, you can see my point in that their little winning streak will not last. I am referring to your favorite masked idiots and they aren’t members of Karnivale. Peach Fuzz and Tooty are in way over their heads if you ask me, your loyal and most favorite narrator. Sure you will never see me, but that’s OK. I don’t want to steal all of their spotlight, because let’s face it…I am the shit. The Fuck Ups and even Magnum XL want to be me. But that’s another story for another time.

This is their biggest match yet. Their biggest test to date and I hate to break it to them, but the Fuck Ups are nowhere near ready. The way I see it, SCW management wanted the tag champions to look strong going into the pay per view, because their mentality is that the Fuck Ups will…well ya know…fuck up. And I am not going to disagree. They managed to win their last match, but that was against an even bigger idiot in Disco Ninja and his decoy or whatever. I didn’t want it. It was a bathroom break and I took a well rounded shit, because Taco Bell kills my stomach but it is so damn good. Now I would love to be able to praise the Fuck Ups, since I have to narrate their story for the most part. I think my job is to cover Peach Fuzz and Magnum XL. Hell, I don’t know. I just show up to work and collect a paycheck. Anyways, as I was saying. I would love to sit around and praise them, because while they are a couple of pussies in reality, they do have a lot of heart that they don’t even know about. A lot of heart and a lot of potential could go a long way in the wrestling business, but deep down, in my gut, I don’t see those two tapping into it. Or tapping anything for that matter unless it’s a keyboard or a game controller.

Fucking virgins.

But it does irk me when someone else besides me points and laughs at them. Sure they are dorks. Sure they are nothing more than a couple of wastes of spaces, but you can’t help but love them. Yeah I said love them. Everyone loves a retard, no matter who you are. Even Chad Evans loves retards. Look at his relationship with Katelyn Buehler for example. The Fuck Ups have been training a lot more than they were when they made their debut. They just put on masks and those ridiculous costumes and learned how to wrestle playing video games and shit like that, taking a page out of Dillusion’s book. It didn’t really work too well. So Magnum XL and yours truly, The Narrator went to work to pump them up full of Flinstones vitamins and made sure they’ve been eating their Wheaties, preparing them for moments like this. This non title match will basically be as close to Rise to Greatness quality as they will more than likely ever get. Saying that makes me sad, because I would love to narrate a story for them on the biggest stage of them all, but shit happens.

I hope Stacy and Gable are ready for the Fucks Ups, because they aren’t ready for this match. The Fuck Ups are, however, ready to get their asses handed to them by two of the best wrestlers in the SCW, that aren’t hogging up the main event scene or airwaves by constantly talking and bitching. We, here, among the Fuck Ups thank this interracial porn in the making couple for that.


Peach Fuzz: “Dude we won!!!”

We open up after the Fuck Ups manage to win their match on the last episode of Breakdown. Yeah, like I said earlier. It was a big surprise. Probably even bigger to them than it is to me and everyone else in the world who matters. Peach Fuzz, if you didn’t noticed, squealed like a little girl just then. It is freaking sad.

Magnum XL: “Yeah…you won. Big deal. You will more than likely lose next time. You guys are about as consistent as Katelyn Buehler’s win-loss record.”

I have to admit…that was a burn. And not the sort of burn Katelyn more than likely experiences ever so often.

Peach Fuzz: “Easy man. Don’t be a hater. Just because we got to wrestle and you didn’t, doesn’t mean you have the right to rain on our parade.”

Wow…he just ran his mouth to Magnum XL. We should all know how this story is going to end, but to those of you who don’t know…I will give you a play by play. Magnum glares at Peach Fuzz who is feeling rather ballsy at the moment. That isn’t good for his health, especially when Magnum has a gigantic case of blue balls. Magnum gets up from his seat on the toilet, as he was taking a shit while Peach Fuzz was talking shit. Toilet paper hangs out of Magnum’s wrestling trunks. Peach Fuzz begins to quickly regret his decision to be a wise ass as Magnum releases an animalistic roar, before kicking him in the gut, putting Peach’s head between his legs, letting him get a whiff of his asshole, that he may or may not have wiped clean, before picking Peach up and slamming him through the glass top on the coffee table…Oh yeah you know what I am talking about.

DOUBLE PENETRATION!

DOUBLE PENETRATION!

And then, Magnum speaks.


Magnum XL: “Don’t you ever tell me what to do with my life again, because next time, I will beat you like I as Ike Turner and you are Tina.”

I am going to go ahead and speak for everyone that would not be pretty for anyone involved. If it goes down, viewer discretion is advised.

Peach Fuzz: “Is that the best you got…bitch?”

Yeah, this isn’t going to be good. If you are squeamish, you need to go ahead and find something better to do with your time. But then again, you should be doing that anyway. That’s just my opinion. Magnum smirks at Peach Fuzz, as Fuzz manages to get to his feet. Tooty Fruity is eating popcorn. Where it came from is beyond me. If I didn’t get paid to include him, I would have missed it just like everyone blinked and missed Chad and Katelyn’s tag title reign.

Magnum XL: “Are you still running your mouth? I am going to assume you took too many shots to the head from that fucking decoy. I don’t want to hurt you Fuzz.”

Peach Fuzz: “That’s good, because your mom would be disappointed.”

Oh Jesus…

Magnum XL: “Excuse me?”

Peach Fuzz: “I think you heard me. Your mom will be glad that you won’t hurt me, so I can put a hurtin’ on her later on tonight. We are going to celebrate.”

Magnum XL: “I am going to cripple your ass, Fuzz. I didn’t want to do this, but you’ve left me no choice.”

And then for some reason, Tooty Fruity pops up in between Fuzz and Magnum, wearing a referee shirt, complete with stripes and a whistle. Fuzz and Magnum look at him, confused, just like I am doing right now, before they turn to look at one another, while I sit here, narrating, still confused as to how Tooty got the shirt and where this is going to go.

Tooty Fruity: “OK bitches! Let me break it down for you. I want a good clean fight and this match will only end in a pin fall or submission. Are you ready?”

Magnum nods. Then so does Peach. Hell, I am ready to see Fuzz get his ass handed to him, so he can realize that he is a pussy, once again. When he realizes that, all will be right in the world again. Let’s do this!

Tooty Fruity: “Let’s…get…it…ON!!!”

Tooty Fruity blows his whistle and Fuzz jumps at Magnum, only for Magnum to catch him, then body slam him into the floor. Fuzz gets back up and charges towards Magnum, but Magnum plants him with a spine buster. This is getting good. I hope for some blood and guts. Magnum stomps over towards Peach Fuzz only for Peach Fuzz’s cowardly instincts to kick in, as he kicks Magnum in his cock and balls. Magnum drops down to his knees and begins to gasp for air. Fuzz grabs Magnum and plants him with a DDT. He then goes for a quick cover.

1...

And Magnum kicks out, tossing Peach Fuzz in the air. Fuzz lands hard onto a piece of the broken coffee table. Magnum gets to his feet and picks Fuzz up off of the ground, then whips him into the metal lockers repeatedly, while Tooty goes back to eating his popcorn. This is good and I am actually envious of Tooty. That never ever fucking happens. Magnum then slaps Peach Fuzz and he shrieks like he is Michael Jackson reincarnated. If you don’t get that joke, then fuck you. You would have to really care less for Mr. Jackson to get it. Maybe.

Back to the action.

After the slap and the shriek, Fuzz falls to the floor and he sees his reflection in a piece of the broken glass. He is bleeding and tears have filled his eyes, close to flooding his eyelids and he sees Magnum laughing. Fuzz feels a deep burning sensation and at first he thinks it’s gas. Or that it is herpes after the attempted rape at the hands of Tiffany. But then, Fuzz realizes that is the buried anger he has held inside since he accidentally electrocuted his parents, cock blocking his father from the last piece of ass he would ever attempt to get. He slowly stands up and turns to face Magnum XL who is the epitome of everything Peach will never be and Peach clenches his fists, then lets out an baby lion roar. Think about Simba’s first roar in the “Lion King” and that is what you get when Peach does. Peach begins to run, charging at Magnum and he leaps in the air and flies like he Neo from the fucking Matrix. He edges closer and Peach begins to feel great about this move, only to realize that he is going to fall short, which he does. Magnum just looks down at him and laughs a little bit more. I don’t blame him. I am laughing too. Watching a nerd get his ass kicked always makes me smile. It reminds me of high school.


Magnum XL: “Do you want to try that again?”

Peach Fuzz: “Do you mind?”

Magnum XL: “Nah man. Go ahead. It’s about time you become a man. So get up and go over there. Get really mad and whatever else you have to do, to at least get close to me.”

Peach Fuzz: “I really appreciate you letting me do this…”

Peach Fuzz stands up and goes to turn around, only for Magnum XL to grab him and kick him in the gut, then planting him with the Double Penetration. Magnum covers him. Tooty continues to eat popcorn. Magnum looks over at him.

Magnum XL: “What the fuck are you doing?”

Tooty: “Eating?”

Magnum XL: “Are you going to count the pin or what?”

Tooty: “Oh yeah man. Sure. No problem.”

Magnum picks Fuzz up again and hits his move a second time and goes for the cover. Once again, Tooty doesn’t budge. Magnum looks at him frustrated. Hell, I am getting frustrated. I haven’t been this frustrated since I watched since Syren and Ducky got it on. I mean, a wrestling match not sex. Either way, I know it’d be hot.

Tooty: “OK man sorry.”

Tooty gets down out of his seat, and begins the count.

1...

2...

Peach Fuzz kicks out! Magnum looks on in disbelief. He gets up and begins to stalk Fuzz as your hero slowly makes it to his feet, bloodied and battered. He turns around and faces Magnum, then tells him to suck it, before earning yet another Double Penetration. Magnum goes for the cover again. 1...

For the love of God…pull a Rodney King, Fuzz and just stay down. It will be the best thing for you to do. Either way, this is more than likely going on Youtube.

Tooty goes to slam his hand down on the ground once more, but Fuzz kicks out. Magnum backs away and just looks at him, as Fuzz climbs to his feet. It takes way too long, giving you the viewer and myself tons of drama and Tooty turns his random CD player on and some dramatic music begins to play. They have a whole CD dedicated to dramatic music. They have nothing else to do with their time besides jack off to women they will never ever have. Magnum looks up at Fuzz and extends him arm and makes a fist.


Magnum XL: “Respect…”

And in a moment that makes me feel like I am on the “Jersey Shore”, Fuzz and Magnum bump fists. That shit is everywhere. Fucking hell.

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Elsewhere

I have to do this because Peach Fuzz wants there to be some sort of villain in his not so heroic life. I went around on the search for the perfect villain and I believe I have found him. His name is Stain. Yeah Stain. He pumps steroids and after kicking the shit out of people, he beats off on them, then flees the scene. He mainly attacks elderly women in wheelchairs because it cracks him up that they can’t do shit about it. Now that I think about it, it’s kind of funny. You don’t have to admit to it, but you know it is. He wears a mask as well, because I paid him to do this, just so Peach Fuzz would feel OK and keep his confidence after earning Magnum’s respect. I don’t predict it lasting very long, but we will go with it. His mask is basically a hockey mask and he wears a wrestling singlet. It’s pink for some strange reason, but it is all we could find so fuck off. He may not look intimidating, but he goes through a fit of roid rage about every two hours, so I wouldn’t want to be around when this pink pussy looking monster flips his lid. And if I were you, the viewer out there, I’d make sure to lock your grandmothers up tight at night. That rhymed. Unintentional.

But right now, Stain is having a fit and he is running over rooftops, in the rain, a lightning storm actually, since that is what Peach Fuzz wants. Fuzz is a weird kid. Stain is on the lookout for anyone and everyone who is alone. He has a raging hard on built up and he wants to get his nut. He also has the urge to stomp someone’s ass. He stops atop of a grocery store that is closing and Stains waits. He waits until he sees his perfect victim. It takes quite some time, so Stain has to think about naked old women to keep his boner, which is weird. Why Peach Fuzz wants this sort of thing in his story creeps me out a little bit. Can I have Tooty Fruity or something? I will gladly trade. Anyways…Stain finally sees one. An elderly lady. She must be an employee at the store, as she has on the official store attire and she is walking to her car. Alone…just the way Stain like his victims. He climbs down off of the roof and he hides beside the Pepsi machine. Other people walk by him, but he doesn’t think they see him and after a few moments, he races towards the elderly woman and yells.


Stain: “STAIN!!!”

She turns around and screams. And what a coincidence…guess who comes walking out of the grocery store? None other than your favorite wannabe hero…Peach Fuzz. Right now he is…he really wants me to say this…holy fuck…Right now he is mild mannered Scott…fucking hell…he got high with Magnum XL in celebration of earning Magnum’s respect. I figured Magnum would get the poor bastard laid, but I can’t see any tits. Moving right along. Gotta keep Fuzz’s peach happy. Fuzz hears the old woman scream and he looks on, to see Stain attacking her. Slapping her around and he hears Stain tell the old woman he is going to fuck her with a donkey’s dick. Really? Fuzz…wearing a trench coat for some weird reason, with his wrestling…err…hero costume underneath it…removes the coat, pulling his mask out of one of the pockets, then over his face and he begins to race towards Stain, letting out yet another baby Simba like roar. Stain stops kicking the shit out of the old woman and turns to face Peach Fuzz. Fuzz gets about a foot away from Stain and they lock eyes. Both breath heavy and Peach Fuzz speaks, trying to make his voice sound rough and gruff, but fails miserably, sounding like a twelve year old boy going through puberty. Jesus…

Peach Fuzz: “Who are you?”

Stain: “STAIN!!!”

That’s it? All he can say is his name? He goes from threatening an old woman with donkey cock rape to just saying his name? Bland man. Really bland…like a Stacy Kissinger promo. Yeah, she means well and she is a hell of a wrestler, but me personally…not impressed. I’d rather just watch her strip…I’m just saying. Peach Fuzz will more than likely have something nice and respectful to say when and if he ever cuts a promo…that is…if he makes it out of this battle alive. But not me. I pull no punches.

Peach Fuzz: “Well…STAIN…you need to leave that poor woman alone. If you want to pick on someone…pick on me.”

Stain laughs. I do too. I can’t help it. Fuzz is going to get killed.

Stain: “Be prepared to get STAINED on…”

Peach Fuzz: “What?”

Stain pulls his penis out and begins to stroke it and Fuzz looks at him disgusted and jealous. He then looks at Stain as he puts on his “O” face. Fuzz knows that there is only one thing he can do, so he charges at Stain and nails him right in the head of his penis, denying Stain his nut, just as Fuzz did to his own dad. May he rest in peace. Or barbecue sauce…dude got fried…sorry. Too soon. Stain yells in agony and falls onto his back and begins to take giant breaths and Fuzz goes over to old lady to see if she needs help, but she pulls out a can of mace and sprays it into his eyes. Fuzz draws back and screams like a little girl again, something he is becoming known for, only to be met with a big boot from Stain. And Fuzz thinks…

Oh know…all I wanted was some munchies…I gotta stop getting high.

Stain picks Fuzz up and slings him into the light pole and Fuzz groans. He turns and is nailed in the face with a right jab, then a left uppercut. Fuzz drops to his ass and spits out some blood. Stain laughs at him and begins to taunt him, taking a few pages from my book as he calls Fuzz a pussy. Pathetic. And so on and so forth. Fuzz slowly gets to his feet, holding his stomach, feeling his entire body shake in pain, but he tells Stain something.

Peach Fuzz: “Bring it you shit stain sandwich!!!”

Um…OK…nice one…

Stain: “With pleasure little man…”

Stain draws back, but stops as the sound of sirens can be heard. Fuzz looks over Stain’s right shoulder to see half a dozen police cars pull into the grocery store parking lot. Fuzz reacts quickly and kicks Stain in the nuts again, before running off, picking up his coat and hopping into Tiffany’s station wagon and speeding off, hoping that he doesn’t get into a high speed police pursuit. His babysitter doesn’t know he took her car. His driver’s permit has expired. He is still pretty high. And he is about out of gas. He keeps driving, constantly looking behind him to see if there are any cop cars behind him, but there aren’t. He sighs with relief as he pulls into his driveway and creeps back into the house, praying to Krypton that Tiffany doesn’t confuse him with a burglar again. He gets into his bedroom and plops down on his bed. He waits for a few moments, before rolling over and burying his face into his pillow and beginning to weep like Rachel McAdams in “The Notebook.” He cries and cries again and we go to a few commercial breaks, before he finally sucks it up and tries to be a man for a little while and he begins to think to himself.

I saved that old lady’s life, even though that stupid bitch maced me. Jesus that shit still burns. I am surprised I made it home. But who was that guy? STAIN? He was fucked up…

My thoughts exactly.

I was a hero tonight. I won’t get any credit for it, because I am not bad ass enough to stick around and shit like Superman. Everyone loves that guy though. Nobody loves me, except for the Fuck Uppers. I am a hero to them, even though they don’t know my real purpose in life. Wrestling is just a way to make a living. Another way to give back to them. But outside of the ring, I am fighting to defend them. They just don’t know it yet. I need to train my body and up my fighting skills, to make sure I stop being a pussy. I can’t remain a pussy my entire life. I need to make some changes.

What gave that away?

I need to become a man as well. I need to believe in myself before I can be a true hero. Before I can become a true man. Before I strike fear into the hearts of those who choose to do evil. To haunt the nightmares of creeps like STAIN! But how? What do I have to do? Do I need to build a Fuzz cave? Do I need a Fuzz mobile? I need weapons for sure. I know that. But what kind?

I cannot believe he is seriously thinking about all of this shit. He needs to become a man. In order to do that, he needs to get some strange on his shriveled old man penis. Yeah…I know. I’ve been narrating his life since birth. Yeah fuck my life right? Right.

I wonder if Tiffany can help me…

I don’t like where this is going. Where is he going? Stop Scott! Shit! Stop Fuzz! Holy Christ don’t do what I think you’re going to do. Yeah…he’s going into Tiffany’s room. Holy shit. Holy shit. Can I go ahead and resign? Anyone want to take over? Anyone? Shit.

Peach Fuzz: “Hey Tiffany…”

Tiffany: “Yeah sweetie?”

He clears his throat and I am building up vomit.

Peach Fuzz: “Can you help turn me into a man?”

Tiffany: “Why certainly. Do you have a condom?”

Yeah he has a condom. It’s in the fanny pack he keeps around his waist. Jesus…why is this happening?

Peach Fuzz: “Yeah sure…”

Tiffany: “Good…because I may or may not have herpes…”

Peach Fuzz: “Good to know…I guess…(whispers) I may have made a mistake…shit…”

WAY TO GO CAPTAIN OBVIOUS!!! Gable I will pay you to let Peach dip his cock in Stacy’s down south area…if God or someone stops this from happening!

Tiffany: “Alright sweetie…get undressed…wake me up if you need help finding the hole…”

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[align=right] “You can tell by the way I use my walk, I’m a woman’s man, no time to talk…[/align]

Peach Fuzz wanted me to put that in here as well. Don’t ask me why, but I am pretty sure it has something to do with his twenty seconds in herpes filled Heaven. Right now, he is at school, walking…or should I say…strutting down the hallway, swinging his arms back and forth, with a smirk on his face, expanding from ear to ear. Not literally, but it’s pretty fucking big and twice as annoying. He walks into class and his cockiness vanishes. His eyes rest upon Samantha Portman as she sits at her desk, studying or something, as I am studying her breast. Those things are fantastic. And that ass of hers is no slouch at all. It’s exquisite if I do say so myself. I can see why Peach Fuzz or…Scott Reed…forgot he isn’t in his costume…I can see why Scott Reed gets all hot and bothered. The only difference is that I am not a pussy. I would do something about it.

Scott sits down at the desk right beside Samantha and they look at each other, but he doesn’t say anything and neither does she. She smiles at him uncomfortably, probably feeling a little weird still after their last interaction. Scott curses himself for not having the balls. Even he is admitting that he is nothing but a pussy. He then thinks about last night, when he finally scored. He owned that shit, he tells himself. He owned it! He then turns towards Samantha and unfortunately, speaks.


Scott Reed: “Hi Samantha.”

She looks at him uncomfortably, while I get comfortable in my chair, looking at those tits!

Samantha Portman: “How’s it going, Scott?”

Scott Reed: “I am feeling pretty good actually. I feel like…I feel like I am going through a lot of changes.”

Samantha Portman: “I guess that’s a good thing. What happened to your face?”

Yeah, Scott is wearing the bruises from getting his ass kicked by Magnum XL and STAIN! I forgot to mention that. I wonder how he’s going to cover this one up.

Scott Reed: “I uh…I got into a fight last night…but I’m alright…”

Apparently he has turned himself into Dr. Seuss. Fucking A.

Samantha Portman: “Oh really? You got into a fight? You don’t seem to be the type to get into fights.”

She seems almost as intrigued as I am with her boobs.

Scott Reed: “I guess I am just full of surprises, huh?”

Samantha Portman: “It seems that you are. So how did it go?”

Scott Reed: “Oh I uh…gave it my best shot. I was just minding my own business when I saw someone who needed help, so I sprung into action and did what I could to help that someone.”

Samantha Portman: “You look like you got your ass kicked.”

He did.

Scott Reed: “It was pretty even I must say. That someone got away unharmed, so that is all that matters. I wasn’t about myself. I just felt that I should do what was right and I feel that I did that. This town needs someone to stand up for the weak and the innocent.”

Why must he ramble? No wonder he can get any ass except for his ex porn star babysitter. She is always horny.

Samantha Portman: “Scott…what are you talking about?”

Scott Reed: “What do you mean?”

Samantha Portman: “You’re rambling.”

Scott looks at her intensely. Key the dramatic music…really? Again? Jesus. And then he speaks.

Scott Reed: “All of this…school…being a nerd…it’s not…it’s not me. I am…I am more…”

Samantha and I roll our eyes.

Samantha Portman: “Let me guess…it’s not who you are underneath that defines you…but it’s what you do…”

Scott Reed: “Well yeah, but you have to say it seriously to have a true effect.”

Samantha Portman: “OK…well I am going to go back to studying now. Good talk, Scott, good talk.”

Scott Reed: “I love you…”

Samantha Portman: “Excuse me?”

I cannot believe he went there. I really can’t. Can I write his story? There are so major changes that need to be made, because Scott has no fucking clue as to what he is doing.

Scott Reed: “Hmm? I didn’t say anything.”

Samantha Portman: “Did you just tell me that you love me?”

Scott Reed: “No I didn’t. You must be hearing things. I would never say that…”

Samantha Portman: “You wouldn’t?”

Hold the phone. Something really isn’t right here.

Scott Reed: “What do you mean by that?”

Samantha Portman: “Wouldn’t you like to know?”

I think we all would. Go ahead gorgeous…spill it! My boy needs to get laid. Just make sure you have him checked first. He may have herpes. FYI, baby, FYI.

Scott Reed: “Yes, I would Samantha. We have known each other since we were kids. We should be able to talk. Things shouldn’t be so awkward all the time. Even if you are popular and I’m…not.”

Samantha Portman: “Yeah that can’t be helped, but I agree. We can still talk.”

Scott Reed: “Then talk.”

Samantha Portman: “You said that you loved me, did you not?”

Scott Reed: “No…yes…Yeah I did. It just slipped out.”

Samantha Portman: “So you definitely meant it. Then, you tried to cover it up, but you failed miserably.”

Story of his life, Samantha, story of his life. I mean it though when I say I’d like to lay my hot dog in between ya buns and by that I mean, my penis between your boobs.

Scott Reed: “Ok…”

Samantha Portman: “Maybe I love you too. Maybe I always have. Maybe I’ve just never said anything, because I didn’t think you were interested in girls.”

Scott Reed: “You mean…you think I’m gay?”

Samantha Portman: “Well…not really. I don’t know anything about you anymore. I wish I did, but you never talk to me. You never invite me over to hang out or anything.”

Scott Reed: “You want to hang out? But what about Edward?”

Samantha Portman: “He doesn’t own me, Scott. I can still come over. It’s not like anything is going to happen.”

If I had my way, things would most definitely happen. I would make sure of it, by God.

Scott Reed: “Nothing is going to happen?”

Samantha Portman: “Who knows?”

Scott Reed: “…The Shadow…knows…”

And he has killed my mood. He has killed any hope he could have had to get laid by someone as smoking hot as Samantha Portman. Way to go, hero! You are an idiot!

Samantha Portman: “Right….we’ll talk later.”

Shit…

[align=center]---[/align]

Well let me tell you something fuckers, this is by the biggest match of our fucked up careers and your heroes, the Fuck Ups, Peach Fuzz and Tooty Fruity are going to be in one hell of a battle, but that doesn’t mean we aren’t going to give the fight right back to the reigning SCW Tag Team Champions. Stacy and Gable hold the titles the Fuck Ups want and the titles the Fuck Uppers want us to wear…at least…even if we have a shorter reign than Chad and Katelyn, but that’s neither here nor there.

We will use the power that we get from the sun, with the energy it gives us, and we will run wild with Fucked up mania, using the power our fans give us as they cheer us on, to overcome the biggest obstacle in our careers, the biggest obstacle on our ride to the top, as we carry the fans with us all the way to the White House…or at least to the top of the tag team division. This match right here…ladies and gentlemen is the start of something good. Man that’s a good song…I think this is the start of something good…Get back on topic Peach Fuzz…

Last Breakdown, yours truly and my partner in heroism…yeah I changed it…so what? But anyways, last Breakdown, we overcame Disco Ninja and his Decoy to get our return off on the right foot, something Stacy Kissinger and I can hop on, so we can do the bad thing and by that, yes I mean sex. I can’t be any worse at that than I am at wrestling and Tooty and I are still pretty bad. We go out there and we try and we cannot be denied that. This match, I promise you, will not be a wrestling clinic and I will more than likely beg for my mother at certain points, and I will get knocked down repeatedly, but I will keep coming back. Tooty will keep coming back and in the end of it all, he and I…along with our Fuck Uppers out there, will do our best to fuck the tag team champions up. Well, maybe just Gable, in a jealous rage, because we secretly want to bang Stacy.

(…Pause…)

Tooty has just informed me that secret is no longer a secret. Well shit…I am hopped up on Red Bull and it really does give you wings, because I believe I can fly and at Breakdown, I can guarantee you that I am going to fly and drop bombs on you guys and give you the fight of your lives…if you were in kindergarten or something…I just hope you are both prepared, because we may or may not be, but I just hope we make it out alive…along with the victory.


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Peach Fuzz sits atop the roof off his favorite neighborhood arcade and he stares down at the small town, as far as he can see. He stays hidden within the shadows of the night. He sees families walking together, smiling and eating snacks from the arcade and he thinks about when he was a child and how he was with his family. Growing up he loved being around them. As he got older, he grew distant, because he just became fucking weird. His dad tried to get him to be cool, but for Scott Reed…that was out of the question. He smiles as he sees their smiling faces, before thinking to himself. And is it me or is this getting absolutely fucking depressing?

I am a hero. I will do whatever I can in order to protect the people of this city. Even if I have to sacrifice my body and my life…if that is what it takes, then so be it. That is what I will do. And if STAIN…or any other dastardly villain decides to pop up in my area code, then things will get nasty. I have to prepare myself for the worst and I have to come out swinging, with my guns blazing. I have to pertain this to my wrestling career as well, but the thing is that I need to find a way to keep both realms separate. My real life and my wrestling career. And I have to find a way to get Samantha Portman to truly fall in love with me, so we can possibly get busy. Or I can at least get a boob grab. I can have hope. There is nothing wrong with that.

That sounds promising. Her tits…Jesus…Well until next time…Same Fucked Up time, same Fucked Up channel…
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