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2018 Anzac Cup Winners : BETTER THAN SEX /with Vile vince Viper & Spike Nelson

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Livewire 8/4
Topic Started: Aug 4 2004, 02:44 PM (285 Views)
SWAT Team
Member Avatar
Syndicate Wrestling & Tradition

[The scene opens, with the camera fixed on a the large, bullet-riddled SWAT logo, a desk in front. Entering from right comes SWAT President Domino, wearing a low-cut and extremely tight black shirt and a tight leather skirt, curves abounding in all the appropriate places. She’s also wearing glasses, proving once and for all that hot women are hotter with glasses on. Instead of sitting behind the desk, she leans on it.]

DOM: Hello SWAT fans, and welcome to another installment of Livewire! First, some announcements…

[Domino adjusts herself on the desk, and rufles through the papers in her hand.]

DOM: Well, first thing to report is all the comings and goings in SWAT this weekl. As you know, I have said that if you don’t promo with Chuck when we come looking, you can say BYE BYE! And look! Chuck’s no shows this week-

[Side-by-side pictures of Nick Rimmer and Vulcan are shown.]

DOM: Rimmer and Vulcan, sorry boys… but you’re out of here. If you want to show up for a match, give me a call. I have to say though, the resemblance between these two is absolutely uncanny! It reminds me of another similar resemblance…

[The pictures of Rimmer and Vulcan are replaced by those of the Ultimate Warrior, in a WWF ring circa 1990, and one of a clean-cut 2004 Warrior making a rousing speech to aspiring conservative college students on “Neo-Conservaplexing in Today’s Magnomificent Supraficial Political Matrices.”]

DOM: Scary! Well, hopefully, we’ll see them down the road someday. We have 3 or 4 more newcomers that will make their debut at SWAT next week, and hopefully we’ll hear from them soon as well. As far as this week goes, we have 3 promos from men looking to make a splash in SWAT, and soon. Today we will have words from 2 of this week’s combatants, and a message from a man for whose name I have been requested to withhold until you see this promo. So without further delay, let’s go to the SWAT cam to listen in.

[Domino smiles and stands up.]

DOM: Chuck, ROLL that beautiful bean footage!

[The scene fades out. Text appears on a black screen.]

Today on Livewire:

- Handy Andy speaks out to Statewide champ Adrian Tanner and gets in touch with his inner housewife, literally and figuratively

- Sly Fondell does his best Fonz impression and tells us what he plans on doing to Stoon and A-bomb

- A mysterious newcomer makes his impressions known to SWAT



********************************************************************


HANDY ANDY


[We see Handy Andy standing in what appears to be a laundry ironing some shirts.]

Handy Andy - Yes, thats right fans. The life of a Handy Man isn't all working on cars, fixing roofs and servicing them lonely housewives.

Especially when the extra money I was making from my career in SWAT seemed to dry up. Seems them suits down there decided to stop booking the Handy One ... thought i wasn't fit enough to compete after the injuries I suffered no thanks to Ned and his Tyre iron.

[Andy finishes ironing a shirt and hangs it up grabbing another shirt.]

But one phone call to that foxy new president Domino and all that has been fixed. Seems there was a communication problem, but thats all been corrected, and I am back into active competition, and .... a Statewide title shot no less.

[Andy finishes another shirt and reaches into the basket, pulling out some frilly pink panties, looking at them in mock shock.]

Wow ... I wonder if she slipped these in here on purpose.

[Andy fishes through the rest of the basket, pulling out several thongs and sexy fish net tops.]

Looks like Mrs ****** is a bit of a dresser. Might have to make sure I drop these off when the husband is at work .... but back to my work, (Handy Andy looks into the camera) and thats you ADRIAN TANNER JR!!

You and me, one on one for the Statewide title. I know you are meant to be a big star in this business Adrian, but i am not to be taken lightly, I could end your title reign just like that!

[Andy clicks his fingers.]

And then it will be my time ... the Handy Reign!

I like the sound of that ... the Handy Reign! Yes, that works, as does this ..

[Handy Andy holds up a fist.]

and this works as well ...

[Handy Andy holds up the iron.]

Adrian Tanner Jr .. I have nothing against you boy ... but you stand between the Statewide title and the Handy One, and thus I must take you down ... underestimate me at your own peril!

********************************************************************


SLY FONDELL

Scene opens up at the Melbourne regency hotel, the hotel is busy with important and high flying guests coming and going. The camera moves up through the reception area and up into the hotel, the camera stops outside one of the exclusive suites on the top floor.

The door to the suite opens and stood in the doorway is Jada, Sly Fondell's valet, to say she looks smoking is an understatement, she looks totally AMAZING!

Jada: Hi guys, come on in the Ace is waiting

Jada turns and slinks back into the suite followed by the camera crew, the camera man struggles not to completeley focus on Jada'a hot butt!
The camera moves into the plush suite and pans around the room, sat watching television is Sly Fondell, he is watching the run down for the Lst No Man's Land event and the card for the upcoming show, Sly looks up and turns off the TV and stands up and walks over to the camera, he grins as he towers over the group

Sly: Finally the Ace gets some TV time, I don't know what you guys put out here as quality TV, but take some advice, import some American programs, that will improve the ratings!

Sly smirks arrogantley at the camera

Sly: So my first match approaches and it's a handicap match against Stoon and A-Bomb, what a joke that is. I guess our commiss is really happy that he has put me in a two on one situation, is he trying to piss me off? But his plans will fail, this may be a handicap match but the handicap is on those two fanooks, not the model of male perfection. I deserve the red carpet treatment, instead I face two men in my first match, I'm the blue print for wrestling perfection yet Xanathos thinks he can treat me like a god damn curtain jerker, well the Ace is gonna put on a stellar performance, one that no-one will ever forget!

Sly preens himself in the reflection of the camera

Sly: So on to my so called opponents, A-Bomb, I'll take him out like Grant took Pittsburgh, he will be diffused in double quick time. Then we have Stoon, what kinda name is that? Anyway his stinking hide is gonna get planted (Sly counts on his fingers) 1,2,3. I f you boys thought you got beat down before, well that was just the starter, you both got the main course coming and believe me it's more than your plates can handle!

Sly stops to preen himself yet again

Sly: Man I look good, infact I look real good, a million dollars good. I got the handsome movie star looks that have every fashion bigshot wanting me on the catwalks in their creations, the body of a greek god, and the power, technique and talent to rule this industry. And to top it all I got the hottest sexiest woman in this entire sport! Man I got it all!!

Sly gives Jada a wink, then turns back to the camera, his piercing blue eyes glinting

Sly: Three men enter, one man leaves and that will be the model of male perfection, while those two peckerwoods lay in the ring like a couple of crack whore's on overtime!! I intend to make my debut one that no-one will forget, boys your gonna be the example to every other wrestler, the exclamation mark will be made right in the middle of my ring, so bring your A-game boys, stock up on your multivitamins, hell even pray for divine intervention, because you are both in the Ace's sights and I don't miss! At No Man's Land you will know why I am called the model of male perfection.................Live and in the flesh baby!!

Jada: OK guys, time to go, now hit the bricks

The camera crew leave, pausing only to get a last lingering shot of Jada, the final shot is of the suite door closing

Scene ends.....................................


********************************************************************


???????

As the video begins the sounds of screaming indaviduals echo accross a dead field of burning roses and bushes. The flames lift up and reach towards the stars of the black night sky. The screams continue into the sound of a heart pounding and then a figure runs through the flames seeming to dance amoungst the hot strings of fire without begin licked by their deadly and scarring heat. The figure is short, slender, and is wearing a pink little dress. It appears to be a child, most likely a little girl enjoying the distruction of the roses. She then stops and looks this way. The shot does a 180 and then another figure is seen, much closer than the little girl is. It is tall wearing a black cape on one arm. It's face covered by it's long hair and a deadly smile peering through the thinner stragelers on the bottom. An explosion is heard and then the sounds of the little girl laughing can be heard. The figure lifts it's head and shows his face. His mouth moves with his words not coming with them but seemingly dubbed a second too late to catch his mouth.

Voice: I've seen pain before and I've seen pleasure. I've known about corruption and I've learned about pure feelings and life. I've always prefer the pure route. Unfortunatly there are those who have not been able to follow the same path and sometimes blood must be spilt to teach them about the heart of life and wrestling. Greed has corrupted their souls and lust has stained their names. It is these indaviduals that become my targets. I attempt to find retribution for them and in terms help them to become better at the sport all together. I do this because this is what my father has taught me to do. It is my goal to help these people, but first I must judge. I warn all to show me their true selves because pain is all I can bring if they don't. There are still lessons to be learned by myself and I have been learning. To learn I've become the first ever HDW Tag Team Champion, I've become the first ever BAW Heavyweight Champion, and I became the final CWF Interglobal Champion. It is with this history I will strike fear into their hearts and with that I will see into their souls. Then they will be judged. For the names of my dead mother and my dead father I introduce you all to one face of Dave Brickheart.

The figure raises it's fist and the flames seem to die down. A flash of lighting blinds the entire picture with white light and the screen fades to black with running letters written in blood "Pain Has Returned". Scene fades...
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