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| Kelly DTU Tournament | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: Jul 27 2012, 12:19 PM (254 Views) | |
| I ~ Sasso | Jul 27 2012, 12:19 PM Post #1 |
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A History In Kelly Squared This is supposed to be the part where Kelly's backstory goes. You won't be getting it, as Kelly realized A. She was too poor to afford to pay someone to give it. B. Everyone is going to skip over this part anyways. So yeah, that's all you get. Sorry. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Our scene opens inside the old VW Bus which is home to Kelly Wilson and her fiancee Justin Kelly. The former has her purple hair pulled back into pigtails, clad in an oversized hoodie and tattered jeans. The latter, well his attire is the reason that young Ms. Wilson is blinking in disbelief. He's wearing a custom track suit with "Team Kelly Kelly 2012" printed both on the jacket, and the ass of the pants. Notable is that he's sloppily tried to cover up the "2012" with duct tape. A tad bit reticent, Kelly decides to ask. Kelly: What ... are you wearing? To which Justin eagerly answers. Justin: The official Team Kelly Kelly merchandise of course! I got us a bunch of gear made, it's all in this bag over here ... He points to a large plastic bag resting on one of the seats. Justin: I got you a track suit too. He beams widely. Kelly: Team Kelly Kelly? Is that the best name you could have ... nevermind. Why is there duct tape on your track suit? A sheepish look replaces the grin. Justin: Well actually, here's the thing. I originally was going to go for a whole Presidential spoof theme for the whole Team Kelly Kelly thing. It was gonna be Team Kelly Kelly 2012, and I was going to be both your campaign manager and running mate. Thought of giving one of those spots to Brandon Young, but I decided to re-assign him to a position to be named later. Kelly has a lot more questions than this, but decides to interject by asking. Kelly: Does he know this? Justin shrugs. Justin: Who knows. Anyways, the point is we kinda got beaten to the punch with the whole campaign theme. She shrugs back at him. Kelly: Oh well, it was worth a try. I guess there's no need for me to wear one of those outfits then. Her fiancee looks horrified at this suggestion. Justin: No, no! We're still Team Kelly Kelly, the duct tape fixes everything about that problem! We just need to think of a new theme is all. I spent way too much money on this gear for you not to wear it. She raises an eyebrow at him. Kelly: Yeah, about that. Where exactly did you get the money to have that made? Justin: What do you mean? Kelly: How did you get the money to have the suits made? Haven't you been following along? We're supposed to be poor, remember. That doesn't really make any sense. Justin: Wrestling, darling. It doesn't have to make sense. Somehow that doesn't seem to satisfy her. Kelly: That didn't answer my question. He quickly decides to change the subject. Justin: We'll just have to agree to disagree. Say, enough about that, how about you give a long, boring monologue about how you're going to defeat the unknown now? I hear that type of thing is all the rage with the wrestling folks. Trust me, I researched this stuff back when I was your campaign manager. I even came up with a whole list of motivating factors for ya, check it out. Kelly: But I don't want ... She's cut off as Justin retrieves a hat filled with scraps of paper. As he retrieves one, he assures her. Justin: Trust me, I know what I'm doing. I'm the more experienced one, remember? I was 2-0 in FCW way back in the day. He reads the scrap of paper as he unfolds it. Justin: Needs to win to save dying wife (can be milked for years). I think we have a winner! Kelly: Alright, I think we seriously need to convene and talk things over. Can somebody have some mercy and stop filming? A brief, awkward silence follows. Kelly: Please? Fade To Black |
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| I ~ Sasso | Jul 27 2012, 12:20 PM Post #2 |
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Kelly is seated in the bus once again as our scene opens up; big shocker there. Justin for his part is taking a nap, which actually is the precise reason why she's chosen this moment to record. Kelly: Okay, I didn't really plan on singling anyone out in particular here. Seems kind of pointless, right? But sometimes a promo comes along that just begs to get ripped to shreds because it insults your, I was going to say intelligence so much, but that's not really all encompassing enough. Plus, I'm hoping this will be useful for future reference when it comes to everyone else who hasn't spoken up yet. So, I'm gonna try my best to see if I can do that without waking the fiancee up. I'll probably have to keep this quick though. A brief pause follows. Kelly: Here's a list of things NOT to do when cutting a promo for a tournament like this. First off, the whole schtick of picking a bunch of people to talk shit on, then robotically droning on through your list is so, so lame. Now I am going to talk about this person, and now I'll talk about why this person is inadequete. So lacking in creativity, and a complete waste of time for the most part. Anyone can do that, and I mean anyone. We've seen attempts to actually be creative here, and then we got ... that. If you're gonna go that route at least try to show some wit along the way instead of doing your best impression of drying paint. She shakes her head. Kelly: Secondly, do not spend half your time droning on about shit in some fed that only the people directly involved could possibly care about. Does anyone know who half the people that got name dropped are? Probably not. Does anyone give two shits to find out who they are? No. I mean hot damn, I'm all for a quick reference to give a bit of exposition, but that THW talk seemed like it would NOT FUCKING END. She recoils a bit, realizing that could have easily woken Justin up. Kelly: Anyways, where was I. Oh right, the third thing. On a related note to number two, if you're saying the words, " I know for a fact that Brian Gun is going to defeat you and take your title," just stop right there, turn around and realize that cutting promos ... you're doing it wrong. Besides the fact that sentence fragment in itself is rife with unintentional comedy, nobody wants to hear about why someone is going to win some stupid title. They care about who's going to win this damn tournament. A light sigh is let out. Kelly: Finally, if you're going to act like a big badass who knows what you're talking about while talking shit about Compton, do not refer to the Crips as the "cripes". There's really more I could've picked apart there, but like I said I wanted to keep this fairly quick. For everyone else in this tournament, you're welcome, I just saved you having to watch that promo. You can skip the beginning part at the pub as well, that was boring as hell too. Peace. Fade To Black |
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| I ~ Sasso | Aug 3 2012, 08:02 PM Post #3 |
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The following footage was recorded a couple of days ago. Why is it only airing now? Because that's how long it took our intrepid team to make it back to civilization. We open in the middle of nowhere on some random backwoods road. Justin and Kelly's magical mystery bus is broken down on the side of said road. To be more specific about the surroundings, they look like the setting of one of those bad horror movies. You know, where the traveling college students break down or get a flat tire and run into some creepy locals. The type who live in a cabin and eat people; either that or they do other weird stuff, you know ... butt stuff. There's a vast contrast in the expressions worn by Justin and Kelly respectively as they stand outside the broken down bus. Justin, still clad in his Team Kelly Kelly gear appears to be in high spirits. As for Kelly, dressed in tattered jeans and a Dead Kennedy's t-shirt? Not so much. Kelly: Where in the hell are we exactly? With way too much enthusiasm, Justin replies. Justin: I have no idea! Growing more agitated, his better half questions him. Kelly: And why pray tell do you sound so happy about this exactly? Justin: Because this is all part of your training! Kelly: What are you talking about? Justin: It's simple, really. This is when she starts to facepalm. Kelly: It's never simple when you say this. Justin: This tournament is all about defeating the unknown, right? Kelly: Yeah .... Justin: So, what better way to prepare to face the unknown, than well ... facing the unknown? If you can survive being stuck in the middle of whichever part of bumfuck we're stuck in, facing some mystery opponent should be nothing! Oh, she does not look pleased with this one. Kelly: You have had some exceptionally bad ideas that I've rolled with, but this has to top them. His tone turns defensive. Justin: Well, I had to come up with SOMETHING new and exciting to prepare you for the second round. It was either this, or get vajazzled by The Engineer and I thought I'd be a nice guy and keep your vaginal sanctity in mind when making my decision. Kelly: My vag ... listen Justin, look where we are! I'm pretty sure there are people worse than The Engineer living around here, who don't care about the sanctity of any of our orifices- including the ear canal. Justin: You should really just trust me; my impeccable leadership as your not-campaign manager helped us to an impressive victory over John Dinosaurus in the first round, now didn't it? Kelly: We have to actually make it to the damn show to win a match, and you don't know where we are! Justin: Hey, now ... it's your job to figure out where we are, not mine. This is your training, remember? I don't think it would be very fair of me to do that for you- I wouldn't want to hog your spotlight. After a brief pause, he continues on. Justin: Besides, forfeiting wouldn't be the worst thing in the World- we're already getting offers for gigs in case you get eliminated. With gritted teeth, Kelly responds. Kelly: We, I mean I'm NOT getting eliminated. We are going to find our way out of this hellhole, and I'm going to take out every bit of pent up rage I'm feeling on whoever's unlucky enough to be standing across from me. I swear, I am going to mop every inch of the ring with them and ... Justin: At least hear me out. Kilroy Evans from the Piltdown Campaign called and offered you a spot as Vice President of Wrestling. Honestly, I'd consider it. We cut our losses now, I've got way more political material saved up for you than wacky training ideas. Plus, I've always wanted to be the Jill Biden of wrestling! Now, if this was a couple decades ago there's no way I'd say yes to being Tipper Gore, but ... She simply blinks at him. Kelly: Are you fucking mad? You drove us all the way out here to supposedly prepare me for my match, now you're talking about forfeiting. Either way, we still have no god damn clue where we are. And don't you even think of coming at me with 'It's wrestling, it doesn't have to make sense.' I am beyond infuriated, and when not if I get us out of this mess you are sleeping on the floor of the bus Justin Theodore Kelly! Suddenly a huge grin crosses Justin's face and he snaps his fingers. Justin: That's it! Perfect! That's the level of intensity you're going to need to kick some ass now that the dead weight has been weeded out. Don't worry, I know exactly where we are- I heard some guy rambling on about Yorlik a couple miles back. You see, this was all a brilliant ruse to get you fired up Kel. A long moment passes before she mutters. Kelly: You're still sleeping on the floor. Pulling out his cell phone, Justin assures her. Justin: Now, all I have to do is call AAA, let them know exactly where we are, and ... oooh. His grin disappears. Justin: No bars. Fade To Death Glare |
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| I ~ Sasso | Aug 15 2012, 10:35 PM Post #4 |
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[We open up inside Justin and Kelly's bus. They're both sitting down, but we have a unique circumstance. This time Justin is the one who looks greatly upset. Kelly actually looks quite content. Perhaps happy to be in the third round, perhaps just happy to be back in civilization.] Justin: Did you hear that? They might be moving on without us! Kelly: What in the hell are you rambling on about now? [With an incredulous look on his face, Justin exclaims.] Justin: The Piltdown campaign! They're talking about making this Reavis guy their VP instead! Kelly: Oh, that. Well for one thing, I already told you I have no plan on being second fiddle to anyone. For another, it's your fault they moved on. Justin: What do you mean it's my fault? Kelly: Remember? You drove us off to the middle of nowhere and left us for dead? [Justin strains as he tries to remember what she's talking about.] Justin: Nah, I don't think that happened. [She quickly snaps back.] Kelly: Well it did. We had to hitch a ride with a creepy trucker guy. Justin: That doesn't sound like something I'd do. Kelly: How can you not remember? The guy had a damn face tattoo! He claimed it was a sword, but the hilt looked suspiciously like balls. Justin: Penis jokes? Really? Geez, no wonder they dropped you from their candidate list with language like that. You're clearly unelectable. [A bright smile then crosses his face.] Justin: I knew it couldn't have been my fault. Anyways, it's time for plan B. [Kelly raises an eyebrow. She'd correct Justin and explain that she wasn't joking, but decides it isn't worth the effort.] Kelly: Plan B? Justin: Yes. This one is foolproof. You know how there's eight of you left? [She nods her head.] Justin: What if there weren't? Kelly: Que? Justin: We systematically eliminate the competition one by one before the event. If we increase your odds enough, you might just have a chance at winning this thing! [An evil smile crosses his face as he rubs his hands together.] Justin: And the best part is ... none of them will know it was coming! Muahahahaha! Kelly: Um, Justin? Justin: Not now, I'm gloating evilly! [Somehow he's petting a white cat now. No, I don't know where the hell it came from either.] Justin: Now where was I ... Oh, right! None of them will know it was coming! Muahahahaha! Kelly: Justin? Justin: Hold on, still gloating. Muahahaha! Muahahahaha! Muahahahaha! Now, what were you saying? Kelly: You do realize this is all being recorded on camera, right? [A long awkward pause follows. Longer than the usual awkward pause between them. We're talking Jun Mazuki long.] Justin: Shit. [He clears his throat and sets the cat down.] Justin: Anyways, I present to you our first target! [He reaches behind his seat and procures ... a Viking hat and fake beard. With one smooth motion, he places them on Kelly. For her part, she's in too much disbelief to even bother taking them off right now.] Kelly: No. Justin: But ... I've been studying Hagar the Horrible, and everything! I even trained Snert here to say Voof! Kelly: That's a fucking cat. Justin: Hush. We're poor, remember? And I ... Kelly: Can we just stop rolling now? Justin: Wait, I even made you a sword all by myself! I got the design idea from some sweet tattoo I saw ... forget where. [He reaches back and unveils ... oh god. The color drains from Kelly's face.] Kelly: I'm serious ... NOW! [Cut directly to black.] |
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| I ~ Sasso | Aug 18 2012, 10:16 PM Post #5 |
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[Kelly is alone in the bus as our scene opens up. That can only mean one thing, it's time for super happy ranty Kelly fun time! One of her legs is folded across the other, and a stern look is revealed on her face as she removes her sunglasses and sets them down to the side. With pure vitriol filling her voice, she begins to speak.] Kelly: Excuse me? I'm one of those women? Where the hell do you get off judging me like that Talfourd? What in the hell have I done to deserve such a label? Show my heart and how bad I want this, when I can actually get a word in edgewise to talk about my goals? Show the fierce determination not to be second to anyone that I've talked about? Oh, wait, that's right- I haven't done anything to deserve the label. Why? Because besides being incredibly condescending, it's also incredibly vague. See, it groups me in as some incompetent that's somehow not representing the female gender properly without actually explaining why ... at all. It's the type of cheap, tired, insult that anyone can throw out without needing an ounce of proof to back it up. Well listen up you snot nosed bitch, you're on my damn radar now. And I pray that we end up faced off with each other, so I can show you just how much of a serious competitor I am. [She pauses to catch her breath.] Kelly: If anything, I have had to overcome twice as much as anyone else here. Because as much as I love him, let's be blunt- my fiancee's best attempts to help have been a complete trainwreck. And if I can overcome that, anything the likes of you can throw at me in the ring will pale in comparison. Not to mention, to be perfectly honest if anyone is making the women in the tournament look bad right now it's you, because ... [Her rant is cut off as Justin enters the bus in his Hagar The Horrible outfit and asks.] Justin: Are you coming? [Not in the mood at all for this, Kelly snaps back at him.] Kelly: No, I am not going to murder Brett Cross with your giant penis sword right now! I'm trying to be serious! [He raises an eyebrow.] Justin: Oh? What about? [She inhales a deep breath and lets out a big sigh.] Kelly: Sally Talfourd. Justin: Oh yeah, her. What a weirdo, leaning on a male counterpart to get through her promos. [A long silence follows as Justin flashes a grin. Whether that grin indicates an incredible lack of self-awareness, or the fact he was just doing a bit of tongue in cheek trolling with his last statement, is unclear. He then whispers.] Justin: I think I know the perfect way to get rid of her though ... it rhymes with Honya Tarding. Kelly: Anyways, as I was saying- if anyone is making the women in this tournament look bad right now, it's you. Really? You're going to 100% eliminate Callahan as a possible opponent this round based off the clue? You do realize that Piltdown has been running a Presidential campaign theme throughout this whole tournament, right? So there's a 50/50 split chance on which one of those two the clue is talking about. Or did you not get the broadcast of his promos from up in your ivory tower? The only possible opponent you should have been ruling out is Johnny "The Goat" Reavis- that's it. Holy shit, this stuff isn't rocket science; it shouldn't be that hard. The only thing more sad than your inability to grasp that concept is that two of you combined couldn't. Jesus tapdancing Christ on a pogo stick. [The cameras pan over and on cue Justin is seen frantically changing into a Jesus costume.] Justin: Have you seen my pogo stick? Kelly: Where did you ... Justin: I don't know if you know this, but I looooove disguises. Kelly: You stole that line from Roger on American Dad. Stop it, we're gonna get ourselves sued that way. [She refocuses herself.] Kelly: So yeah, like I was saying- you didn't come off too bright. Oh, and really? You're going to bust out the oh so cliche tactic of listing off people one by one, and how they can't possibly match up to you? With all the venom, and biting wit of a Special Olympian, I may add. That boring, cliche, tripe is a good way to end up on my list, and ... Justin: You have a list? [A horrified look crosses his visage as he points at her.] Justin: Serial killer! [For her part, our purple haired protagonist simply shakes her head.] Kelly: Lost my train of thought there. But the main point is, whoever I'm facing is in even more trouble than they were before now. Whether it's Talfourd, or someone else. Because thanks to her, and anyone else out there who thinks like her, I've got even more of a point to prove now. I am not some affront to women in wrestling, and I sure as hell will not be treated like one. Everyone just watch, as I go above and beyond to turn your heads- I'm done here for now. [Fade To Black] |
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| I ~ Sasso | Aug 22 2012, 08:59 PM Post #6 |
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[Kelly doesn't look in the best of moods as the scene opens up on her and Justin. Yes they're in their damn bus again, what do you expect, they live there? She's wearing a baggy black t-shirt and ripped jeans, with her hair back straight. Justin is wearing a grey hoodie, and also has torn jeans- their wardrobes aren't very diverse. He's seated next to a brown backpack, while she leans against a wall of the bus.] Justin: What's the matter, grumpypants? Kelly: Well, it doesn't look like I'm getting my hands on Talfourd this round if the hint is any indication. One of us will be facing "the darkness", who I assume is Thirteen this time. Justin: Hey now, you should look on the bright side of things. Like be happy for the guy, he wanted to be the darkness so badly, did you hear that one promo he did? Kelly: Of course I did. Justin: Well the ghost of human kindness says turn that frown upside down and be happy for your fellow man then! [She sighs.] Kelly: Please don't tell me you're going to dress up as ... Justin: No, that's the one costume I don't have. Anyways don't worry, I have just the thing in case you're that brave young woman who has to face the darkness! [Grinning like an idiot, he procures a flashlight from the backpack next to him. Holding it aloft, he continues beaming as Kelly rolls her eyes.] Kelly: Ha ha. I don't suppose you have any serious suggestions. [His expression turns confused, as does his tone.] Justin: What do you mean? I am serious. I'll distract the ref, then you hit them with this flashlight. Kelly: Yeah, no. Justin: Listen to me Kel! I won't steer you wrong! Lights on, lights out! I'm your own personal Mr. Miyagi. Kelly: Whatever you say hon. Justin: The Pharoah of the Flashlight! The Earl of Illumination! Kelly: Okay, I get the point. Anyways, I'd prefer to just outwit him out there, if I am facing him. I don't think the guy's that bright. Justin: That's a rather pointed thing to say. What would lead you to think that? [He asks, quizically.] Kelly: Did you hear his promo last round? The whole thing on how we could all have different personas and whatnot in our home companies? I mean isn't that pretty easy to debunk by you know ... doing our jobs and watching film on our opponents? There was only 8 of us left by that point. Justin: True dat. If Reaper was able to study years worth of footage on everyone when there was 32 of you all, that should be no problem. Kelly: That seemed like a rather unnecessary shot. And you call me mean? [Justin adopts his best "Who, me?" expression, and Kelly simply shakes her head in response.] Kelly: But I need to adopt a strategy if I'm going to be facing Callahan too. He looks pretty ... Justin: Say no more! I have the perfect diversion. Allow me to demonstrate! Here, you be Callahan. [He rifles through the backpack and pulls out an NRA badge which he hands to her.] Kelly: I'm not putting this on ... [She responds, her voice beginning to trail off as Justin has already disappeared out of sight behind one of the seats.] Justin: And I will be ... [He re-emerges, and oh lord. He's dressed in drag; as a certain Southern Belle to be specific.] Justin: Hey sugah! It's a right pleasure to meet such a muscly politician such as you! [She's facepalming so hard in response. So, so hard.] Justin: Why don't you try some of my home baked ... Kelly: Stop, please just stop. For one, you might accidentally offend Natalie and she's really nice. For another, it's disturbing how much you actually sound like a woman right now. [Our special crossdressing friend pouts.] Justin: But ... but ... it's foolproof! [Kelly looks up.] Kelly: No it's not. You broadcast your secret plan on camera ... again. [A moment passes before that sets in.] Justin: Damnit! Why does that always happen to me! Kelly: Oh, and you want to know the final reason why I want you to stop? Justin: Not really. Kelly: Because I'm going to do things my way. It's worked for me so far, and it's going to continue to work. Me going out there and showing just how damn good a wrestler I am, how much passion, spirit, and intensity I carry has gotten me this far. Your wacky plans and disguises got us lost in the middle of nowhere to the point where I almost missed one of the matches. I've still got a giant damn chip on my shoulder from what's been said about me, and the only way to completely shut up my doubters is going to be to win this whole damn thing. Besides, I can almost taste the $500,000 dollars- and lord knows if anyone in this tournament could legitimately use it, we could. I didn't get this far to have it screwed up by some wacky plan, or to cheat my way to the finals. Every step I've taken in this tournament I have earned and I will continue to earn everything as I go through whoever I'm facing this round, then win the whole damn thing. [A fire and intensity emanates from her as she finishes up, while Justin meekly responds.] Justin: I said not really. [Fade To Black] |
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| I ~ Sasso | Sep 7 2012, 03:47 PM Post #7 |
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[As we open up on Justin and Kelly, Justin is surprisingly not up to any shenanigans. That's because he stuffed himself on way too many Cherry Pop Tarts, so he's simply sitting back digesting alongside Kelly. He still manages to keep an upbeat demeanor though.] Kelly: And the award for failure to comprehend the English language goes to ... Thirteen! Justin do we have a prize for him? [All too cheerily, Justin replies.] Justin: Indeed we do! He's won a free date with a top of line Natalie Burrows look-a-like! [He flashes that wide grin of his.] Kelly: Your understanding that I came into this tournament, would happen to be wrong. Natalie Burrows said I was best known as Justin's manager in her circle of the wrestling world, or something along those lines. Wrestling's a big World Thirteen, deary. Again, these are the types of things you would know if you actually watched the footage that's out there. Like I suggested. Oh, and by the way, you're prattling on now about me assuming that Reaper had footage of you from years ago, and explaining that he must not actually have watched it. Which was something Justin said by the way, not me. Let me break that down for you a bit slower ... that ... was ... a joke. A ... joke. Would you like me to explain to you how a joke works? You see one way it works is you mock an absurd statement by someone else. Such as "Reaper claims he's watched years worth of footage on 32 different people." That is considered a mean tongue in cheek joke, hence me telling Justin it was mean. Half of what he does is make sarcastic and tongue and cheek jokes. Do you understand? Anyways, my point still remains that it's rather easy to check current day and see that people are in fact who they claim to be, or where they work. Besides film, there's a magical little invention called Google. [She rolls her eyes.] Justin: I don't know what she's talking about, I'm always serious. Always. And when I'm not serious, it's because I'm too busy being serious. Kelly: But let's look at your brilliant logic a bit further. You think I'm just known as a Manager, which would make this my first major wrestling foray. Right? And you're going on about needing to look in the mirror and worry if people will be able to take our word seriously if we fall here. Holy crap, your mind games are so lame and ineffectual. Think about it for a moment; no matter what happens here. If I was really just thought of as a manager before, do you really think even making the final four of an interpromotional tournament will do anything but improve my stock? Again, this is just the scenarios presented in the fantasy World that you live in. [Justin frowns slightly.] Justin: His fantasy world is no fun, I was expecting hobbits. Kelly: Furthermore, you go on to bitch and whinge and bitch and moan and bitch and bitch some more because supposedly "everyone" has labeled me the underdog hero. Waaaah, everyone should be calling me the underdog and not Kelly. Look how much I've overcome! You fucking idiot, you're the first person I've heard call me an underdog in this thing. You're complaining that I received a label that you were the first one to place on me. Think about that. Go ahead and name one person besides you who's called me that ... [A pause follows.] Kelly: Nobody? Thought so. Oh, and by the way. You had a tough life, big fucking deal. You're not going to get a medal for it. This is wrestling, like anyone left hasn't run into people with an awful backstory before. And nobody cares what you got put through in SCW; this isn't fucking SCW. I thought we've already had this discussion before.All leaning on "Oh, I've been through so much in life and in my home company" like a crutch does is show a serious lack of creativity. Anyways, I think I've said enough about you. All you proved you can do is drone on, whine, and not grasp basic logical concepts. Oh, and act like your rambling is somehow deep and profound and might make us question ourselves. You know why people tune you out? A. Because your arguments are full of holes and you make assumptions about the lives people who you admit to knowing little about have lived, and B. Because you're fucking boring. I'm out, sorry if you're unlucky enough to be standing across from me this round, Thirteen. Justin: Ha! I see what she did there! Get it? Unlucky? Thirteen? I'm marrying myself a clever one. Kelly: Oh shut up dear. [Fade To Black] |
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| I ~ Sasso | Oct 1 2012, 01:34 PM Post #8 |
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[We open up in an arcade to the sight of fleeing patrons. Why are they fleeing? Well a look at the Wac-A-Mole machine would reveal the reason why. Brandon Young, and his partner in crime Justin Kelly happen to be going to town on the machine- except they're not using the hammer. Instead they're using katanas. They're also clad in Gis; Justin's with a name patch that reads "Young Silverware", while Brandon's reads "Medium Silverware". Justin's fiancee, the purple haired Kelly Wilson happens to be standing nearby holding Brandon's daughter, Olivia. Olivia has been dressed up like Quan Chi, while Kelly is clad in a ceremonial robe which reads "Master Pong", and a fake Fu Manchu mustache. ] Master Pong: Do not rush your training, Young Silverware. He who rushes his training will only be trained to be rushed. Medium Silverware: That sounds like what happens when we play human video game Mario Kart on the Nintendo Wii! Young Silverware: Please, I can defeat you at Nintendo Wii at any time. My body is ready! [Master Pong and Medium Silverware share a laugh. ] Master Pong: Oh, Young Silverware you have much to learn. Medium Silverware: Yes, brother Young Silverware. You have much to learn brah. Young Silverware: Not as much to learn as Billroy Nevins and Andre Cartilage. Shared forced laughter. Ah ... crap, I wasn't supposed to read that last part was I? [Master Pong sighs.] Master Pong: Way to break character; now I dressed up in this ridiculous getup for nothing. This outfit with my hair makes me look like Shang-Tsung in his rebellious younger teenage years. [Feigning anger as he sheaths his Katana, Justin/Young Silverware shoots back while walking out of view of the cameras.] Young Silverware: Oh, I see how it is. I guess I'm not needed here then if I'm such a screwup. Fine then! But I'll keep reading my narration if I want to, damnit. Young Silverware exits the shot as the scene slowly fades to black! [Master Kelly raises her hand while shifting Olivia so she can keep a good grip on her. She's just noticed something now.] Master Pong: Uh, hon? Why do the cameras say DTU on them? Justin: What do you mean? Kelly: You told me this was the Hardkore World camera crew. Justin: It isn't? [Kelly sighs. So, so hard.] Kelly: No, it isn't. What the hell am I supposed to do now? [She hands Olivia off to Brandon who sees it best to slink off out of sight.] Kelly: I mean, for one, a lot of the people watching this aren't even going to get the references and jokes we made. For two, it makes me look totally ridiculous after bashing people for making references to their home companie. For another, I was going to be cutting a serious impassioned promo for DTU. This means a lot to me, hell, it means a lot for us. Period. [Justin shrugs.] Justin: Well go ahead and do it then. [Kelly's brow lowers.] Kelly: How in the hell am I supposed to be taken seriously while wearing this Fu Manchu? [Her male counterpart looks offended.] Justin: Hey, don't bash the Fu. Embrace it. Embrace the Fu Master Pong! Kelly: I most certainly will not. [Justin lets out a loud exaggerated sigh.] Justin: Fine! [He starts to rip the Fu off, before Kelly begins to protest with a look of pain on her face.] Kelly: Ow! Ow! Stop! Stop! It's caught! Justin: Caught on what? Kelly: My nose ring. [She replies while grabbing her nose.] Justin: You have a nose ring? Kelly: .... Justin: I'm going to take that as a no. [Kelly just shakes her head.] Kelly: Whatever, I'll just do this with the mustache on. It's really simple Callahan. I'm not one of those people who cares about your ideologies, or whatever. All I care about is getting a winner's check. The little preview for the match said it all. For me and Justin, this is the kind of money that can change our lives. And I damn well plan on earning a better lifestyle for us. I'm this close to at least being able to refurbish our bus so we have some decent living conditions, and will not let this opportunity slip through my fingers. I know you're good, really good- but I'm prepared to overcome that. I've been making my way through this whole damn tournament that I started as just another name, and kept advancing while so called bigger names fell by the wayside. [Her gaze is transfixed straight ahead, totally serious. Unfortunately for her, it still looks rather amusing with the getup she's got on.] Kelly: Whatever way you slice it, you may want this really, really bad, but I need it. I know you're someone who's been making quite the impression on people and name for yourself. Me, this is my chance to start forming my legacy. My chance to have a breakthrough moment. I won't let you, or anyone else take this away from me. I won't be stopped. Period. Justin: You know what I've always wanted to try? Coke Zero. [Kelly's momentum having been completely derailed, silence follows. That's finally broken by Justin letting out a loud belch, while Kelly simply buries her face in her palms and the scene fades to black.] |
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8:47 PM Jul 10
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8:47 PM Jul 10
