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| Who was Jesus? | |
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| Topic Started: Aug 5 2012, 05:14 AM (441 Views) | |
| Deleted User | Aug 5 2012, 05:14 AM Post #1 |
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Deleted User
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GOD ENJOYS A GOOD LAUGH! There were 3 good arguments that Jesus was Black: 1.He called everyone brother 2.He liked Gospel 3.He didn't get a fair trial But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was Jewish: 1. He went into His Father's business 2.He lived at home until he was 33 3.He was sure his Mother was a virgin and his Mother was sure He was God But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was Italian: 1.He talked with His hands 2.He had wine with His meals 3.He used olive oil But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was aCalifornian: 1.He seldom cut His hair 2.He walked around barefoot all the time 3.He started a new religion But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was anAmerican Indian: 1.He was at peace with nature 2.He ate a lot of fish 3.He talked about the Great Spirit But the most compelling evidence of all - 3 proofs that Jesus was a woman: 1.He fed a crowd at a moment's notice when there was virtually no food 2.He kept trying to get a message across to a bunch of men who just didn't get it 3.And even when He was dead, He had to get up because there was still work to do! Can I get an AMEN? |
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| Dana | Aug 5 2012, 05:22 AM Post #2 |
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WWS Hummingbird Guru & Wildlife photographer extrordinaire
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Hallelujah Sister! |
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| Durgan | Aug 5 2012, 05:37 AM Post #3 |
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Veteran Member
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Blasphemy! In Ireland you would be placed in the stocks or at least be publicly condemned by every politician. In a Moslem country you would be stoned to death if the same comments were attributed to Mohammed. And of course have the riots which would be condoned by the Western media, with plenty of pontification about respecting another's religion. Who was Jesus? Which attracted my interest. Mostly a figment of some Greek writers imagination. His myths sure caused a lot of misery for the last 2000 years, and we are just coming out of the dark ages now in some parts of the world. But is it wasn't him, it would be someone else. The sheeple need to be led and flogged periodically. It is so comforting for many. |
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| Trotsky | Aug 11 2012, 01:07 AM Post #4 |
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Big City Boy
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Jesus was certainly gay becasue he wore a dress. His dearest friend John was called BELOVED. He lived with his mother WAY too long. His best female friend was a prostitute, the PERFECT fag-hag. He was never out of the company of 12 men whom he ordered to "leave your wives and follow me." God knows, he was certainly heavy into S and M with a bunch of soldiers. And he was ultimately disowned by his father: "Why have you forsaken me" He knew how to throw a party even if they ran out of bread, fish and wine. And who else could make a fashion statement that would endure for millennia with only a bunch thorn encrusted vines? I mean, really, getting your feet washed with Chanel #5??? Puh LEEZE! (Can you see John Wayne doing THAT?) But really, he was pure fantasy:
AMEN! Edited by Trotsky, Aug 11 2012, 01:11 AM.
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| campy | Aug 11 2012, 01:19 AM Post #5 |
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Handyman Extraordinaire
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He just happened to change history forever? You do realize you are insulting fellow posters who might just happen to be Christians? Edited by campy, Aug 11 2012, 01:20 AM.
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| Deleted User | Aug 11 2012, 05:41 AM Post #6 |
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Deleted User
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I originally got this joke via e-mail from a friend who is a deeply religious evangelical Christian, so if she was passing it on, I doubt there are too many out there who would find it offensive. |
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| campy | Aug 11 2012, 09:47 AM Post #7 |
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Handyman Extraordinaire
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Whatever it takes to get through this crazy world is fine by me. Whether it's atheism, or religion or whatever turns your crank. Go for it and don't knock others who go for their "moment in the sun". |
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| Dana | Aug 11 2012, 11:43 AM Post #8 |
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WWS Hummingbird Guru & Wildlife photographer extrordinaire
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There are always some who would make trouble where there is none. |
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| campy | Aug 11 2012, 03:56 PM Post #9 |
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Handyman Extraordinaire
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That's why you post? Right? |
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| Darcie | Aug 12 2012, 12:12 AM Post #10 |
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Skeptic
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Dana, some people can't be repaired, they have to be angry at anything and everything to make their day. |
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| Trotsky | Aug 12 2012, 01:26 AM Post #11 |
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Big City Boy
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Gee, when I said that Christ was obviously GAY I thought I was giving him the highest praise. :angelwand: Not my fault if others would assume it was derogatory to be gay or CALL someone gay? If Christians are wounded by the thought of a gay savior, then perhaps they should take a hard look at their religion. |
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| Dana | Aug 12 2012, 03:16 AM Post #12 |
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WWS Hummingbird Guru & Wildlife photographer extrordinaire
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I worked with at least 2 men like that. One was even nick-named 'Oscar', from Sesame street. He looks awful these days with some illness and the other who always had a mad on for something or somebody has had a severe heart attack. It pays to take it easy and laugh a little now and then. I heard some people having a discussion on radio recently about coming out about being gay. Mentioned was the fact that Christ was a welcoming loving individual. They, being religious, don't think he would spurn gays. Didn't he hang with Mary of the streets? Did he get married and or have children? Hmmmm. Edited by Dana, Aug 12 2012, 03:17 AM.
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| campy | Aug 12 2012, 11:48 AM Post #13 |
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Handyman Extraordinaire
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Here's the point. The gays have fought to be recognized and not criticized. Now that they are recognized they turn turtle and start criticizing. One day I will be able to figure humans out. |
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| margrace | Aug 12 2012, 02:33 PM Post #14 |
Gold Star Member
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Yes we had a board member who was always yelling at meetings at anyone who disagreed with him. He died soon after of a terrible bout of cancer. Who was Jesus, it was a common name back then and there probably were several prophets called by that name. |
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| Trotsky | Aug 12 2012, 11:57 PM Post #15 |
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Big City Boy
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Don't count on it campy. |
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5:56 AM Jul 14