| You are currently viewing our forum as a guest. This means you are limited to certain areas of the board and that there are some features you can't use or read. We are an active community of worldwide senior members participating in chat, politics, travel, health, blogging, graphics, computer issues & help, book club, literature & poetry, finance discussions, recipe exchange and much more. Also, as a member you will be able to access member only sections, many features, send personal messages, make new friends, etc. Registration is simple, fast and completely free. Why not register today and become a part of the group. Registration button at the very top left of the page. Thank you for stopping by. Join our community! In case of difficulty, email worldwideseniors.org@gmail.com. If you're already a member please log in to your account to access all of our features: |
| 3 men and a bear | |
|---|---|
| Topic Started: Dec 17 2013, 01:05 PM (144 Views) | |
| Deleted User | Dec 17 2013, 01:05 PM Post #1 |
|
Deleted User
|
We have a curmudgeonly former neighbor who just moved back to rural Colorado, and I am the only Jew he ever knew. We were never close friends, but we were organic gardening buddies. I am the only neighbor here with whom he stays in touch, and he is constantly sending me jokes involving Jews, liberals or both. Usually they are appallingly racist and I delete them, but this one I found quite funny. Three Holy Men And A Bear A Catholic Priest, a Baptist Preacher and a Rabbi all served as Chaplains to the students of Northern Michigan University at Marquette in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan. They would get together two or three times a week for coffee and to talk shop. One day, someone made the comment that preaching to people isn't really all that hard,a real challenge would be to preach to a bear. One thing led to another, and they decided to do an experiment. They would all go out into the woods, find a bear, preach to it, and attempt to convert it to their religion. Seven days later, they all came together to discuss their experiences. Father Flannery, who had his arm in a sling, was on crutches, and had various bandages on his body and limbs, went first. 'Well,' he said, 'I went into the woods to find me a bear. And when I found him, I began to read to him from the Catechism. Well, that bear wanted nothing to do with me and began to slap me around. So I quickly grabbed my holy water, sprinkled him and, Holy Mary Mother of God, he became as gentle as a lamb. The Bishop is coming out next week to give him first communion and confirmation. 'Reverend Billy Bob the Baptist spoke next. He was in a wheelchair, had one arm and both legs in casts, and had an IV drip. In his best fire-and-brimstone oratory, he exclaimed, 'WELL, brothers, you KNOW that we Baptists don't sprinkle! I went out and I FOUND me a bear. And then I began to read to my bear from God's HOLY WORD! But that bear wanted nothing to do with me. So I took HOLD of him and we began to wrestle. We wrestled down one hill, UP another and DOWN another until we came to a creek. So I quickly DUNKED him and BAPTIZED his hairy soul. And just like you said, he became as gentle as a lamb. We spent the rest of the day praising Jesus. Hallelujah! The Priest and the Reverend both looked down at the Rabbi, who was lying in a hospital bed. He was in a body cast and traction with IVs and monitors running in and out of him. He was in really bad shape. The Rabbi looked up and said: "Looking back on it, “circumcision” may not have been the best way to start." |
|
|
|
| Durgan | Dec 17 2013, 01:11 PM Post #2 |
|
Veteran Member
|
Pretty Good. |
|
|
|
| Darcie | Dec 17 2013, 02:09 PM Post #3 |
|
Skeptic
|
Sending this one on, including my Jewish son-in-law. :sign10: |
|
|
|
| angora | Dec 18 2013, 04:36 AM Post #4 |
|
WWS Book Club Coordinator
|
funeee! :) |
|
|
|
| 1 user reading this topic (1 Guest and 0 Anonymous) | |
| « Previous Topic · Sense of Humour · Next Topic » |