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| Flat; A poem. With words. | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: Monday, 10. January 2011, 21:35 (100 Views) | |
| Jessie | Monday, 10. January 2011, 21:35 Post #1 |
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Hippohypocamputhalamus
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Flat Sometimes you drop off the face of the earth, While people in churches keep ringing their bells, And you're not certain why, or what that could be worth, They're all so deluded, kept under THOSE spells It's so obvious, right? The hard, frozen truth It's so clear that whatever you want never lasts You can break every nail, you can chip every tooth, But it's simply a fact that you'll never get past Then one day you realize the earth isn't flat You don't see how you could drop off it at all Why would a person think strange things like that? But the minute it you think it, love... down, down you fall. |
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| Cow! | Monday, 10. January 2011, 21:56 Post #2 |
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Moojestic Queen Moomay the Resplendent and Hot
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OH MY GOD. ... HI! Nice to see you're still writing epick pomez. And +500 for finally coming back. Apparently I should ignore you more often
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| Warrior Poet | Tuesday, 11. January 2011, 01:14 Post #3 |
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If you lead me, I will go.
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Noice. You know what would really impress me? A poem without words. All seriousness aside, this is an interesting one. So I'm not sure what you mean by the whole church bells comparison. Before mass communication, the church bell was the only reliable way to get everyone in the village to gather at the same place in the same time. This seems to be more about what's taught in church, and there are definitely churches now and in the chruch-bell days that were deluded. A few of my friends belong to these deluded churches and it's pretty sad how self-centered they are. This isn't a problem with God, but a problem with men, and I think it will be for at least some time. There are other churches out there that are very honest, truly worship God, and reach out to the world with both love and logic, providing for physical and even mental needs all over the planet as well as spiritual ones. I'm lucky enough to be part of one. But once I understand the comparison, I'm sure I'll appreciate it. I can appreciate stuff I don't agree with ![]() I really like the rhyming in this thing, all the way through. The rhymes were subtle and most were slant rhymes, and I didn't even notice they were rhyming until I looked. That's EXACTLY how it should be. There was one line that didn't make much sense though Why wouldn't a person think strange things like that unless someone told them something else, or better yet how to think for themselves? Also, some trivia here. The Bible does not teach that the earth is flat. This was taught by the Catholic church back when it was common sense. The main reason they tried to keep the flat-earth idea alive was because if they were wrong about the world's shape, people would think they were wrong about God. If they had just admitted, "These scientists have learned something new about the world God created," and added it, it would have been much better. Unfortunately, Catholics are human beings too ![]() The last line is the most interesting part. I'll have to sleep on that one for a while. I'm not sure what your worldview is, and interpreting a poem isn't fully possible unless you really understand what they believe and why. My main criticism for this one is that the comparisons you used were both tired and old: church bells was used in a more original way, but the flat earth one is one I've heard way too many times ![]() Well, I look forward to your next one! |
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| Jessie | Tuesday, 11. January 2011, 16:28 Post #4 |
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Hippohypocamputhalamus
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Thanks WP!! I appreciate the thorough feedback. The church bells are meant to represent the unfaltering belief of many participants in religious faith - the bells keep ringing if there are two people or two thousand. Even if these beliefs are a delusion, those who stand by them appear to be happier than those who would prefer to - in their own words - "be realistic". That part of the poem, at least, is a social commentary that has everything to do with religion and especially Christianity. The rest of the work is driven by my favorite device: irony. The narrator of the poem believes followers of religion to be deluded, when in fact he is the one that has supposedly "dropped off the face of the earth", implicitly suggesting that the world in his view must be flat, implicitly implicitly suggesting that he is also deluded. The final line is a nod to one of the philosophical ideas produced by transcendentalism: the idea that the world is what you make of it, and you have the power to think whatever or however you wish. Thus, if you believe the world is flat, it is entirely possible that you could fall off it. Thus, if you believe your religion is true, it becomes a Fact for you personally, and no matter what other people tell you, it can and will hold true. Hopefully that clarified some of the spiritual concepts. I understand that the bible doesn't teach about the flatness of the earth, and it was not my intent to suggest that it did. But thanks again for the constructive criticism! I now know that somebody actually pays attention
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| James | Tuesday, 11. January 2011, 19:48 Post #5 |
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it's all cool
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The last stanza is awesome. J'saying. Reminds me of ring around the rosie..
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| Warrior Poet | Tuesday, 11. January 2011, 22:37 Post #6 |
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If you lead me, I will go.
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Nice, I really appreciate the thorough explanation too. Without it, it seemed to be something entirely different, claiming Christians are deluded and that God (love) is dead, and then not even giving a reason for it. But the explanation cleared it up a bit. Your stance on Christianity is still very confusing, but I'll get to know that more as I get to know you more too. I'm a Biblical Christian and by extension a Creationist too. I think we're going to be good friends! transcendentalism rant Also I really really like "break every nail, chip every tooth" |
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| Jessie | Wednesday, 12. January 2011, 00:44 Post #7 |
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Hippohypocamputhalamus
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One other main theory of Transcendentalism is that the physical, material world doesn't actually exist. If this is so, the only thing I can know for sure is that I exist as an individual, which is a prelude to Agnosticism (and personally I find Agnostic ideas, for the most part, vague and hard to relate to). If the spiritual world is the only thing that exists, then it's easy to surpass the more complex forms of logic and science. The world looks flat. Therefore it IS flat. It's always interesting, for me, to combine these ideas with the Deistic notion that God wrote the laws by which nature operates in the very beginning. Because we are lower life-forms than God, by my own observation it seems we have to abide by these basic rules (read: Newton's laws ). However, ever since Adam ate the apple, we do not have to follow the same spiritual rules as the other creatures with which we share the earth. We can defy God all we want and ignore the consequences, at least until the theoretical afterlife.I could go on and on and on but I won't for my own mental health. I find this conversation thought-provoking and I'm glad we can respectfully attempt to see each others views.
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| Warrior Poet | Wednesday, 12. January 2011, 04:37 Post #8 |
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Lol, what exactly are your views? |
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| Jessie | Wednesday, 12. January 2011, 16:32 Post #9 |
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Hippohypocamputhalamus
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I'm really not sure, myself. I believe that God is a being of immense Good, and we should try our best to lead our lives according to that example. I believe there is some truth and that this Good is present in virtually every religion. I believe that as human beings we are ultimately also beings of Good but we can choose to dip our toes in Evil (or in some cases completely submerge ourselves). I don't believe that following the rules is always the best way for my in-born Good to manifest itself. In short, I know what I believe but I have a lot of difficulty finding a label that fits all of my views. |
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| Warrior Poet | Wednesday, 12. January 2011, 20:34 Post #10 |
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If you lead me, I will go.
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Depends on whose rules? Man's rules definitely don't always line up with Gods, but what if God passes the rules? jw |
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| Jessie | Wednesday, 12. January 2011, 20:42 Post #11 |
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Hippohypocamputhalamus
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Sure, sure. Mainly man's rules - both written and unwritten. If a rule is really God's than there would be little point in breaking it unless you're a masochist or something. |
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I find this conversation thought-provoking and I'm glad we can respectfully attempt to see each others views.

2:30 PM Jul 11