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RIP; More messing around huzzah
Topic Started: Friday, 4. February 2011, 19:52 (69 Views)
Jessie
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Hippohypocamputhalamus
Rip
Rip like that was
A rip like
That was not a rip
Like that was not a rip but
Smoke and a gun and that was
Like a rip but smoke and guns
And that was not a rip but smoke and guns and
Bloody bullets rip like that
Was not a rip but smoke and guns and bloody
Bullets rip like that was not a rip
And I couldn’t tell the difference when I passed to Hell
Couldn’t tell the difference from the
Rip like that was not a rip and Satan and the smoke and guns
And bloody bullets and my heart is only iron.
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2012 Poem of the Year - 2011 Best Poet
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mousely
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Lose.
I read it three times...but I don't get it. I'm trying to understand it...but I don't. I like it, but I don't understand it. lol.
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Jessie
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Hippohypocamputhalamus
Linguistically, I made it deliberately confusing by using a sort of sequential pattern for the first few lines, and offsetting where the phrase started.

One,
One, two
One, two, three
One, two, three, four

One,
One, two, one
Two, three
Four, one, two,
Three etc.

As for what it's actually about, it's about war. :)
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2012 Poem of the Year - 2011 Best Poet
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mousely
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Lose.
Oooh I get it now. :)
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Warrior Poet
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If you lead me, I will go.
Nice. I really like your literary experimentation with these. I just did a sonnet, but maybe I should do something even weirder.

Have you ever heard of L.A.N.G.U.A.G.E. poetry? I think you'd like it, a lot.
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Look carefully. There's something wrong with this picture.
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Harket
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asian
... i so fail. I dont get it at all. But hey, judging from the others, its pretty good. I think. :)
Birds don't like to fly, they have to fly.
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