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| Toronto Raptors: :hoops:; HOOPS | |
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| Topic Started: Mar 8 2012, 09:28 PM (1,911 Views) | |
| Kou | Mar 8 2012, 09:28 PM Post #1 |
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Devonta
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I remember playing wall ball in grade school wondering if the Raptors would ever be good, flashforward to being an old man and they're not WELL SOMETHINGAIHSfjjsfajfsfsff Posted Image MEET DA FUCKIN RAPTORS DA SLAMMAS AND :hoops: ERS Posted Image C - Oliver Miller 25 years old 6'9" 280 "The Big O" (Because he is fat) is a true superstar of this team, pistol whipping a man at a barbecue cookout and being currently in jail for five years for it. Oliver Miller ending up playing in Greece, Italy and the spicy southeastern europe powerhouse. the Harlem Globetrotters. Whom Oliver had two stints, Miller was released for showing "no appreciation for what it takes mentally and physically to be a Harlem Globetrotter" RATINGS B- C- D B+ C+ C 1995 STAT LIIIINE - 33.1 MPG 12.9 PPG 7.4 RPG 1.4 SPG 1.9 BPG Kou J Kouerson's lol o the day - Oliver Miller made a comeback (from getting fired from the Globetrotters and playing in the CBA) with the Timberwolves in 2003-2004. He was listed at 315lbs but still averaged 10 minutes and 2.5 points. John Kahn eat your heart out Posted Image C - Žan Tabak 25 years old 7'0" 245 Winner of the coveted "Name Kou Thinks Is The Best", Tabak is probably the most successful member of the expansion Raptors. Having ripped up the Euroleague with fellow teammates Dino Rađa and Toni Kukoč, winning three straight championships. Rađa was drafted in 89, Kukoč in 90 and our man in 91. Though he would not sign for the team that drafted him, the Rockets, until 1994. Tabak's time in Toronto was marred by injuries. He is currently not a degenerate like Miller and is the head coach of Sant Josep Girona RATINGS C+ D+ D+ B B- D 1995 STAT LINE - 19.9 MPG 7.7 PPG 4.8 RPG Posted Image PF - Acie Earl Age 25, 6'10", 240 The only good picture I can find of Acie Earl is of him flailing around against the Celtics, the funny part? I got that picture from a "Worst 10 Celtic Draft Picks" article. They loved it too. Acie Earl was a force in college, the pro game however eluded him like a good parking spot. Acie is living on borrowed time, as his last NBA season was next year. After that he went on a world tour, playing in Australia, France, Turkey, Poland, Russia, Serbia and Austria. After that stellar basketball career he would do what any of us would, coach a team in Mexico. He was manager of the Tijuana Dragons for the 2005 season. He is now the freshman coach of class 2A Solon High School. RATINGS B- C- D B+ C+ C 1995 STATS - 15.6 MPG 7.5 PPG 3.1 RPG Kou J Kouerson's lol of the day - I forgot Montenegro. Posted Image PF Carlos Rogers Age 24, 6'11", 220 Notable for being in the trade that sent Scottie Pippen to the Blazers. That's about it. RATINGS B- D+ D B C C[/b] 1995 STATS - 18.6 MPG 7.7 PPG 3.0 RPG The next two players are ghosts PF - Dan O'Sullivan PF - Dwayne Whitfield Posted Image SF - Tracy Murray Age 24, 6'7", 228 Murray played for six different NBA franchises, so already you know like all of our players he is a stud. Just seven days after being drafted, on July 1, 1992 Murray was dealt twice in the same day. He was first traded to the Milwaukee Bucks for guard/forward Dale Ellis and then dealt by the Bucks to the Portland Trail Blazers for forward Alaa Abdelnaby. Note to self, trade for Alaa Abdelnaby. Murray had his best offensive season in 1995, naturally this meant he left Toronto in 96 via FA going to Washington RATINGS B- A- C B+ C C 1995 STATS - 30 MPG 16.2 PPG 4.3 RPG 1.6 APG 1.2 SPG GHOST TOWN/I DON'T CARE SF Martin Lewis SF Jimmy King SF Vincent Esposito Posted Image [PG]PG - Damon Stoudamire[/PG] Age 22, 5'10', 171 Our shining prince and first draft pick. He went to Woodrow Wilson HS so he is also the best person ever. Mighty Mouse is the cornerstone of the franchise, which just means he's actually good amongst this mess. He won the Rookie of the Year despite missing ten games at the end of the season. Just like the real Damon, he will bring us points until I decide to flip him for something sexier. RATINGS C A- A B+ C- C 1995 STATS - 40.9 MPG 19.0 PPG 9.3 APG 4.0 RPG 1.4 SPG 3.8 TPG Too lazy to find a picture PG - Alvin Robertson Age 33, 6'4" 190 lolbackin up Damon lole RATINGS C C+ B- A C C THE FUKKIN RAPTOR ROSTER Posted Image 1995 Raptors Record - 21 wins 61 losses UP NEXT: START OF THE SEASON AND SHIT Edited by Kou, Mar 8 2012, 10:11 PM.
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Mar 8 2012, 10:22 PM Post #2 |
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Tyler
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I like how Damon Stoudamire has [PG][/PG] tags. And Tracy Murray has a 50 point game! |
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| IShootFours | Mar 8 2012, 10:43 PM Post #3 |
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Trust The Process
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this might be the most anticipated diary in my EBL career. |
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| Kou | Mar 8 2012, 11:37 PM Post #4 |
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Devonta
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I didn't sign anyone okay? I just...IT DIDN'T WORK OUT OK. Let's whip these assholes into shape in KOUERSON TAKES THESE ASSHOLES TO TRAINING CAMP The results: No one changed? NO ONE? Does my game even work right. Anyways, we're rolling with Miller - Earl - Murray - Robertson - Stoudamire in a Slow offense that likes to trap. Hopefully we are slightly better than the irl Raptors and can draft Kobe or something and then we can have two 96 Kobe on a different team diaries or something. DAYS 1 - 30 Posted Image WHAT THE FUCK No seriously what. How? No. How? Look at this start of season. Raptors 110, CAVALIERS 109 RAPTORS 102, Hawks 82 RAPTORS 96, Pistons 94 Raptors 113, HORNETS 109 RAPTORS 86, Clippers 84 The answer? Zan Tabak scored 27 against the Hawks so that's probably it. LOOK AT THEM STATS. Posted Image Oliver Miller is barely holding on to the starter job as Zan Tabak is CLEANING IT UP as the C/PF backup. Though Miller edges him out in blocks. We are turnover city, however. With both Murray and Stoudamire popping 3.0+TOPG. Damon isn't scoring that well either. Alvin is useless as fuck at SG and I should replace him as soon as possible (nice SPG though). We are only scoring 92.3, thankfully the 76ers are plopping up a 87.2 turd so we're far from bottom. TEAM STATS 92.3 PPG 45.8 RPG 23.8 APG 11.3 SPG (Second in the league) 6.4 BPG 16.9 TOPG (second worst in the league) 95.5 oPPG OF NOTE: Our first points as a franchise were scored by shitbag Acie Earl. We can never take that back. The Cavs offered us Dan Majerle for Zan Tabak. Since Tabak is on a Tabakear we of course say no. David Robinson is your player of the month and the Craptor's own Stoudamire is your RoM! WOOOO. Posted ImageWE ARE 10 WINS AWAY FROM BESTING THE ACTUAL 1995 TORONTO RAPTORSPosted Image 30-60 AND ALL STAR GAME SHIIIIIIT NEEXTTTT |
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| Kou | Mar 9 2012, 12:16 AM Post #5 |
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Devonta
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MORE FUCKIN GAMES Posted Image We're still a bad team but apparently not that bad at all, almost pulling off .500 with a non player at SG. CHECK OUT THESE STATS (now sorted!) Posted Image Mouse still sucks, Murray is carrying us on O. ASGGGGGGG Damon Stoudamire starts on the Rookie team at ASG Kerr and Jordan flame out of the 3P shootout, Sean Elliott of the Spurs wins it 16-14 over Dell Curry. Jordan also flames out of the slam dunk in the first round as well. Penny Hardaway wins with a 95.4 over Tony Dumas and Alonzo Mourning. No Raptors make the All-Star Game, starting lineups are WEST Robinson - Barkley - Drexler - Hornacek - Kevin Johnson EAST SHAQ - Mourning - Webber - Jordan - Terrell Brandon WEST BEASTS EAST 112 - 102 David Robinson is ASG MVP with 19 points, 9 boards. Jordan shuts down Hornacek and Mitch Richmond. Posted Image WE ARE THREE WINS AWAY FROM BESTING THE 1995 RAPTORSPosted Image Edited by Kou, Mar 9 2012, 12:21 AM.
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| Kou | Mar 9 2012, 03:46 AM Post #6 |
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Devonta
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aaaaaaaaaaa Posted Image I've just stopped understanding why this works. Damon was player of the week after he scored a triple double, the first in Raptor history. We somehow have the third best D and even managed to hold the Bulls, beating them by double digits. (Though we have lost to them three out of four times) YOUR STATS Posted Image Tabak has become the super 6, since Carlos Rogers is garbage. All the players are garbage really. I might as well not even put a SG out there. :hoops: WE ARE BETTER THAN THE 1995 TORONTO RAPTORS BY 7 WINS :hoops: |
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| Kou | Mar 9 2012, 03:53 AM Post #7 |
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Devonta
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Posted ImagePosted ImagePosted Image Posted ImagePosted ImagePosted ImagePosted ImagePosted ImagePosted ImagePosted ImagePosted ImagePosted ImagePosted ImagePosted ImagePosted Image Edited by Kou, Mar 9 2012, 03:54 AM.
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| Dubb | Mar 9 2012, 08:00 AM Post #8 |
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That's what she said
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Damn Hornets moving to New Orleans in 1995 apparently. <_< |
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| Kou | Mar 9 2012, 12:38 PM Post #9 |
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Devonta
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And the Grizz debuting in Memphis |
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| Mofoticon | Mar 9 2012, 05:30 PM Post #10 |
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EBL Commissioner
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nobody changes during the 1st TC after the 1st FA period fyi |
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| Kou | Mar 10 2012, 02:06 PM Post #11 |
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Devonta
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fyi b my j |
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| Ess See | Mar 10 2012, 10:40 PM Post #12 |
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JStarr
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Best.diary.ever. |
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| Kou | Mar 14 2012, 03:32 AM Post #13 |
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Devonta
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yo son we need a PG yo call up that fa line who we got. Posted Image Eric Snow? THAT GUY? OK. ok. book him in. to the starting lineup. RATINGS - C+ D+ C B+ D A |
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| Kou | Mar 14 2012, 03:42 AM Post #14 |
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Devonta
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HANGIN WITH DA SNOW MAN damon stod died on day 95, a loss to the spurs. DAY 96 RAPTORS 86, Nets 82 DAY 97 Raptors 88, KNICKS 80 DAY 99 RAPTORS 99, Grizzlies 73 #snowsanity |
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| Tylerdelphia | Mar 14 2012, 03:46 AM Post #15 |
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WC
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#SNOWinginToronto |
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