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Toronto Raptors: :hoops:; HOOPS
Topic Started: Mar 8 2012, 09:28 PM (1,914 Views)
Kou
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Devonta
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The Day the Music Died

DAY 110

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Sports are full of magical tales, this one is about Eric Snow being completely useless yet the Raptors continuing to firmly implant themselves into the playoffs in their maiden year.

With a stunning stat like in nine games of
31.6 MPG, 7.3 PPG (being outscored by super 6er Zan Tabak), 3.0RPG, 3.9APG and 1.2 SPG
Snowsanity has guided the Raptors to a 6-3 record in the games he has started.

But then.

INSERT HORRIFYING PICTURE OF TRACY MURRAY BRUSING HIS HIP IN A GAME HERE

Murray goes down was the shot heard around southern Ontario as STAR Raptor Tracy Murray hit his hip hard and will miss a week.

Of the remaining 7 games the Raptors play, 6 of them fall within that week.

WILL THE FUCKING RAPTORS MAKE THE PLAYOFFS?

Quote:
 
Maybe


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Kou
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Devonta
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DAY 111
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Kou
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Devonta
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DAY 116
Oliver Miller of the Raptors is injured for 8 days due to a Groin Pull.

Jesus hates the Raptors.

Zan Tabak is made GTG #1
Edited by Kou, Mar 14 2012, 04:15 AM.
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Kou
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Devonta
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DAY 119
Nets 103, RAPTORS 101

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The final game?

Pacers @ RAPTORS

Can a line up of Acie Earl/Zan Tabak/Tracy Murray/Alvin Robertson and ERIC FUCKIN SNOW make the playoffs? CAN THEY?
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Kou
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Devonta
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Kou
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Devonta
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MVP OF THE LEAGUE - DAVID MRS. ROBINSON
ROOK ROOK - Arvydas Sabonis, BLAZEEEE
Defensive Hood Goty - Shawn Bradley, Bucks
Sixth Moogle - Brian Willams - Clips

Mighty Mouse makes the all rookie second team at PG. Tyrus Edney of the Kings was better than him.
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Kou
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Devonta
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THE MAGIC ARE YOUR 1995 CHAMPS with Shaq daddy blasting through the cinderella Kings.

Mitch Richmond guided the Kings to the finals but they could not seal the fairy tale as SHAQTASTIC reigns supreme.

END OF SESONSOAN

OLD MEN LEAVING
Alvin "useless" Robertson of the Raptors has retired

TRACY MURRAYSON wants 82m over 6 years. The Raptors decline in an attempt to get a lesser contract through via FA or just lose him who fuckin cares.


OLIVER MILLER tests FA (lol)










da draft lottery.

RAPTORS are #9 in the Lottery.






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Coming up next "I draft someone shitty"
Edited by Kou, Mar 14 2012, 11:08 PM.
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Kou
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Devonta
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PG Allen Iverson is your #1 pick, going to the Grizzlies.
PG Kerry Kittles follows him, going to the 76ers
PF Shareef Abdur-Rahim to the Nets
TWolves draft PF Wyatt Mourning
Pistons go with SG Ray Allen
a run on PGs sees Tony Delk, Stephon Marbury and Patrick Mottola go to the Warriors, Cavs and Clips respectively.

Tha Raptors are on the clock.
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Kou
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Devonta
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With the 10th pick of the 1995 NBA Draft, The Toronto Raptors select CANADAS OWN STEVE NASH.

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RATINGS - C B B C+ D+ B

THE REST

10 Hornets - PF Marcus Camby
11 Heat - PG Charles Gill
12 BLAZE - C Priest Lauderdale
13 LAKESHOW- C Erick Dampier (lol Kobe is still on the board)
14 Hawks - PF Antoine Walker
15 Bucks - SF Jason Hinkle
16 Pacers - PF Dean Garrett
17 Sonics - C Skylar Lue (must trade for)
18 Kings - SG Matt Maloney
19 Knicks - PF Brady Daniels
:banana: 20 Mavs - SF Kobe Bryant :banana:
21 Wizards - SF Damian El-Amin
22 Rockets - C Parker Abbott
23 Jazz - SG Erick Strickland
24 Celtics - SG Chris Robinson
25 Spurs - C Jamie Feick
26 Nuggsgs - SF Lloyd Feick
27 Suns PG Derek Fisher
28 Bulls - PG Marcus Brown
29 Magic - C Travis Knight (lol we have Shaq get another C yo)

ROUND 2 NOTABLES
4 TWolves - PF Jermaine O'Neal
17 Sonics - PF Malik Rose
20 Mavs - C Vitaly Potapenko


RAPTORS SECOND ROUND PICK IS

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Ben fuckin Wallace

RATINGS - C+ F+ F+ B C+ D
Edited by Kou, Mar 14 2012, 11:35 PM.
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Kou
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Devonta
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FA Day One aka "IS THIS REAL LIFE?"

aka The signings the Raptors missed out on

Terrell Brandon resigns with the Cavs, 7 years 105m
Latrell Sprewell resigns with Warriors, 7 years 105m
Alonzo Mourning signs with the Magic, 6 years 82m
Tracy Murray (lol) signs with the 76ers, 6 years 82m
SHAQ signs with the LAKESHOW for 6 years 82m (Snubbed the Raps)
David Robinson resigns with the Spurs, 6 years 145m
Mitch Redmond gets PAID and goes to the Cavs for 5 years 77m
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Kou
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Devonta
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Day 2 AKA New Raptor Day

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C -VLADE DIVAC aka fuck Oliver Miller
22m for 4 years
RATINGS - B C- C A B C

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SF - DENNIS "kWo for life" RODMAN
2 year min
RATINGS - C+ D+ C C A C

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PG - POOH RICHARDSON
22.5m for 3 years
RATINGS - C B+ A- B+ D+ C

Other signings
OLIVER MILLER GETS PAID?!?! 12.7m for 3 years to the Cavs

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Kou
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Devonta
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Day 5? I don't know. Whatever man. THE FINAL PIECE OF THE PUZZLE.

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PG - STEVEN KERR
15m for 3 years
Ratings - C A C+ B- D B




YOUR 1996/97 TORONTO RAPTORS TRAINING CAMP
C - Vlade Divac - No Change
C - Zan Tabak - REGRESSION B- IN to C+ C- HN to D+
PF - Acie Earl - IMPROVEMENT B- IN to B D HN to D+!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
PF - Carlos Rogers LIKE I GIVE A FUCK
PF- Dan O'Sullivan - NENAD TC C+ IN to B- F+ HN to D- B- DF to B
PF - Dwayne Whitfield - CUT I FORGOT TO CUT HIM
PF - Ben Wallace - BUST B DF to B- C POT to D r i p ben wallace
SF - Dennis Rodman - GREAT HAIR
SG - Jimmy "Who Cares"
PG - Damon Stoudamire - WHAT A- OUT to B+ C- REB to D+ C POT to B??!?
PG - Pooh Richardson - JUST GOT PAID, TIME TO RIP B+ OUT to B B+ DF to B
PG - STEVEN KERR - who cares about your C INSIDE TO C-
PG - Steve Nash - MVP. MVP. MVP. B OUT to B+ B HN to A-!!!! B POT to A
PG - ERIC "LINSANITY" SNOW - STILL GOT IT D+ OUT to C- B+ DF to A-

YOURRRRRR 1996/1997 TORONTO RAPETORS


BUT WAIT

A TRADE.

RAPTORS WITH A STRAIGHT SWAP

POOH RICHARDSON IS SENT TO THE ROCKETS FORRRR

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SF - CLYDE THE FUKIN GLIDE DREXLER
7m 1 year deal (dumps Pooh's contract since he's shit)
RATINGS - B- B C+ A- C D
Averaged 19.3 PPG with the Rockets last year.

SO. YOUR RAPTORS!

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WE MAKIN THE PLAYOFFS BITCH


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RDT
Tyler
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Pooh Richardson for Clyde Drexler <_<
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Kou
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Devonta
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Clyde is 34 (I don't get it either)
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Kou
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Devonta
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BREAKING NEWS:

Teams are dumb so we signed Larry Johnson (A- B C+ C+ C+) and Jayson Williams (B D+ D+ B A-) on FA. Larry Johnson will be our C/PF backup. Jayson will be starting at PF, Acie Earl will probably be moved.
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